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Altoids as Sex Toy: Fact or Fiction?

Fri, Apr 17, 2009

Advice, Confessions

altoidsphoto by Mistral938

This “curiously strong mint” with sexy ad tag lines (“Pleasure in pain”; “These mints have not yet been rated”; “Shrinkage may occur”; “Dental Damn!”) was the subject of a widely circulated 1997 email extolling the mints’ powers as an oral sex aid. (Hmmmm, we wonder who originally sent that email? Could it be…Altoids?!) The faux email reached widespread urban legend status when it was referenced in that noted collection of hot erotica, Kenneth Starr’s impeachment report: Monica Lewinsky handed the prez a printout of the email while she herself was sucking on an Altoid (cheeky monkey). The jury’s still out on whether it’s all hype — Snopes doesn’t know what to think, and apparently Bill rebuffed Monica’s minty advances, meaning even the Starr Report can’t enlighten us. But if you’re going to, er, look into the matter yourself, sensitive vagina owners beware: getting anything with sugars in and around your sensitive bits might lead to irritation or infection. So do your own research — whether with Altoids, Tic Tacs, Fisherman’s Friend, or Hall’s Mentholyptus — at your own risk. Those who throw caution to the wind should report back here.

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20 Responses to “Altoids as Sex Toy: Fact or Fiction?”

  1. Isis Uptown Says:

    Yes, this is true. Chew a few Altoids (original) before going down. Some partners may be more sensitive than others, so you are at your own risk!

  2. Jennifer Says:

    Lol I know this does work from personal experience. My honey woke me one morning with a nice little suprise. He had an Altoid in his mouth and went down town. I didnt know this til I started to feel a tingling, amost hot sensation. Needless to say it was a hot experience. Although I would advise like Em and Lo, to be careful. As it may be safest to stick to the clit with this idea, no need to chance discomfort later for pleasure now.

  3. Heather Says:

    Boys like it :)

  4. Kel Says:

    I tried (crunching some in my mouth pre-bj) when the urban legend was first in circulation, and found that the cinnamon ‘toids worked better than mint.

  5. Mwah! Says:

    Yes, this works! I tried it just last weekend. My bf didn’t notice anything at first, but then a few minutes in, he noticed something a little different that he liked. It’s a tad awkward to give head with one still in your mouth, though…

  6. Lily Mathilda Says:

    Hhmm.. the comments are making me curious…

  7. Wendell Says:

    I feel the same as Lily above. Skeptical, but curious.

    I personally like minty toothpicks, or as the company calls them, “Australian Tea Tree Chewing Sticks” and am curious about their use on people regardless of their equipment–no sugar to be found!

    (Duh disclaimer: chew on the toothpick for a few minutes before going down. Keep the damn things away from each other’s crotches!)

  8. Kristine Says:

    I’ve never tried mints before, but I have tried ice, which my boyfriend found to be a surprising, yet pleasant experience. Though after reading this, I definitely think I need to jump on this mint bandwagon.

  9. Francine Says:

    I’ve never done the Altoids thing but one thing that my boyfriend loves is menthol drops (like Halls). Sadly, it seems to be something that feels good for guys and bad for girls (think cold burning on your lady parts… bad news).

  10. NLP Zine Says:

    I found your blog on Google. I’ve bookmarked it and will watch out for your next blog post.

  11. liHl.BihTt:: Says:

    WelL…HAHA iVE TRiEd iT..i HAd PuT A ALtOiD iN MAii MoUTH B$ EHAd..ADn WuNCE i STArtEd HE DiDnT NoTiCE But THEn HE SED HE FElT TinGlEy AlL oVEr HiS BoDy.AnD HE LoVEd It now WeN We DoOH HAVE ORAl HE LyKZ ToOH BRiNG tHE AlTOiDs lOl

  12. seks shop Says:

    Needless to say it was a hot experience. Although I would advise like Em and Lo, to be careful. As it may be safest to stick to the clit with this idea

  13. big daddy Says:

    this does work. in fact, I used it 2 weeks ago on a whim. Only recently thought to google it. I used a few tic tacs and cold water. have the glass of ice water next to the bed. You and your partner can switch off between mints and cold water while giving each other amazing oral! She gave me an ‘Ice-Cold BJ’ – mind-blowing!! I gave her a ‘minty mouth’-job – also mindblowing!! This is now something we do on the regular – my lover and I. Everyone should try it at least once!! Sex is all about experimenting in pleasurrrrrre :-)

  14. Biffington Says:

    I was poking around (no pun… well, maybe) looking for some info on this as last night the lady decided to impulsively pop one into her pie. After a brief ‘uh’ moment, I shrugged and went for it. Very tasty for oral and, if you don’t take too long with the licks, the little mint bounces quite nicely around your fire helmet! A little burn-y, but definitely not unpleasant. The missus enjoyed it, although she also enjoys bites, scratches and reality TV, so it’s somewhat relative.

    It’s now the next night and there are no lingering effects, although I’m still wondering how safe this is to continue as she keeps grinning and shaking the little tin at me… I mean, if you can put an Altoid in your mouth, you can put it anywhere, right? If you can down it, you can pound it? What’s safe for the eat is safe for the meat? If you can… ok, I’m gonna stop now.

  15. j Says:

    try french kissing with altoids! me and my bf tried it last night and it’s awesome. you stick one in your cheek or anywhere in your mouth and your partner tries to get it out with his/her tongue. :) great deep kissing, tastes great, and i guess it could be a subtle way to freshen your partner’s breath if they need it!

  16. S Says:

    Yes it’s AWESOME. Only if it’s a little peppermint altoid and not so much it freezes your sex off. Peppermint is all we’ve used.

  17. sugarmag Says:

    The other thing that’s great for oral is drinking hot tea, imagine a hot mouth. Just be careful not to spill!

  18. weird dude Says:

    I HIGHLY recommend a mouthful of Wendy’s frosty for an awesome bj. It’s the cold like ice but not too cold or hard. It’s mushy and it sloshes around giving an amazing mix of warm and cold sensations all at once.

  19. Barry Says:

    i dont know about altoids but ive been told about fishermans friend work so give it about and the wife will be home from work and we will have a go.

  20. Barry Says:

    about the last comment i was that excited that we were going to try it that i didnt say how long iwas going to give it ,( 1 hour ) lmao

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