aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Beware of Greeks bearing gifts.
taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
Play slow, win slow; play fast, lose fast.
cancer (June 22nd-July 22nd)
If you are in hiding, don’t light a fire.
leo (July 23rd-Aug. 22nd)
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one.
virgo (Aug. 23rd-Sept. 22nd)
You’ll never plow a field by turning it over in your mind.
libra (Sept. 23rd-Oct. 23rd)
It is for her own good that the cat purrs.
scorpio (Oct. 24th-Nov. 22nd)
The nearer the bone, the sweeter the meat.
sagittarius (Nov. 23rd-Dec. 21st)
You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar.
capricorn (Dec. 22nd-Jan. 20th)
It is a far better thing to bespoil your youth than to do nothing with it.
aquarius (Jan. 21st-Feb. 18th)
From listening comes wisdom and from speaking comes repentance.
pisces (Feb. 19th-Mar. 20th)
As the dog said, “If I fall down for you and you fall down for me, it is playing.”
June 1st, 2009 at 6:05 pm
Is there, perhaps, somewhere we can look up the meanings of these?
June 2nd, 2009 at 3:58 am
Heh, I think they’re all pretty explanatory. Like my favorite, “Don’t try to whistle with your mouth full of Jello.”
June 2nd, 2009 at 4:20 pm
Where do you get these? They are hilarious.
June 5th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Just wanted to say, the these stars are SO right, A couple weeks ago they said for the taurus, about how not to mix work and pleasure together and WOW!! They are so correct because yeah that gets you in a lot of trouble never thought the stars could really tell me my future but this sites did big time!! I now, every week make sure I check this site for them.
June 5th, 2009 at 7:38 pm
I like to dabble in them every once in awhile but don’t look for them. Sometimes they are spot on, other times they are sooo off base. Its like a football weekend of pics, I don’t care how knowledgable or dumb you are, chances are you will pick winners.