Most Useless iPhone App Ever Claims to Rate Your Sex Life

passion_iphone_app

Maybe we’re just jealous because we’re still trying to come up with an iPhone application that will make us millions while we sleep (why oh why did we not come up with iFart first?), but we think that the new Passion iPhone app that scores your boinks has about as much to do with good sex as a fart joke. We admit that we haven’t road-tested the application — $4.99?! Are you kidding? — but this description tells us all we need to know: The timer measures duration, the microphone measures orgasm, and the accelerometer (the iPhone’s built-in motion sensor) measures activity. In other words, an hour-long jack-hammer-style session that leaves a woman yelping in pain from the genital equivalent of rug burn will be a big winner! Same goes for that Meg Ryan wannabe who fakes her way through three octaves. (And yes, there’s a “high scores” board if you want to brag about that rug burn.)

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4 Comments on "Most Useless iPhone App Ever Claims to Rate Your Sex Life"


3 years 7 months ago

And what about those who enjoy intercourse in silence?

4 years 11 months ago

I think sex with an iPhone is always going to be “kind of sloppy!”

5 years 23 days ago

There are quite a number of adult sex toys that connect to you iPhone. That’s what I call a “smartphone”

5 years 1 month ago

What we actually need for an IPhone app is something that actually detects the studs from the ‘Oh, was that its’. I would be willing to pay a couple of hundred bucks for such an app and after a night of heady passion, we could leave comments on their personal shagometer message board.
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There, thats my idea now can someone develop it and give m a cut please.