But then I started approaching women casually….waiting for a bus, in line for coffee, etc, just making chit chat. I only asked out maybe 1 in 10, but I looked at the situation as “Which of these women will say/do something that impressed ME?” I didn’t do any of the BS that the “approach” guys teach you (insulting the woman, etc.), but just had casual conversations. Most of the women were ok/boring, so I passed. But my current girlfriend was really funny, smart, and hot, so I asked her out.

1.5 years later, we’re totally happy. She has told me that a lot of guys had approached her in the past, but were clumsy. She said that I seemed comfortable and wasn’t waiting to drop a pickup line, and that made her comfortable.

You’re spot on if you’re trying to pick up someplace like college, or within a social circle, or workplace, or whatever.

But if you find yourself high and dry and want to start all over with total strangers, Em&Lo are spot on with this.

The only way to get good at making passes is through practice. Speaking as a seduction community guy, I had to make at least a hundred approaches before I started getting smooth.

And now… damn, I am smooth. I can easily strike up conversations with women, start flirting, escalate sexually, and get them home in a matter of hours or less. And I can do it consistently. This is something I once considered an unattainable feat for me. I thought the guys who could do this just had some special magical power that I lacked. Never thought I could be one of them.

But it took work, and some SERIOUS volume approaching. And I got it wrong along the way many times. Weirded a few girls out, offended a few, bored a few more… you get it. This doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Practice makes perfect.

You can’t expect to just live a socially and sexually closed life 99% of the time, then bust out the ladies’ man act once in a blue moon when you see a girl you like. Doesn’t work like that for some of us.