Comments on: Dear Dr. Vanessa: Any Medical Libido Booster for Gals?

By: Wendell

Wendell — Sun, 14 Feb 2010 17:49:16 +0000

Lady, thanks for bringing Wellbutrin up. For those, like myself, whose depression symptoms include(d) lack of libido, this medication could help out. Of course, it isn’t the best way to boost libido for all.

By: Madamoiselle L

Madamoiselle L — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 16:51:50 +0000

Camelia, I asked my GYN for testosterone for that very problem. He gave me Viagra, instead, I think I am going to basically insist on some testosterone the next time I see him. The Viagra is too damn expensive, and you have to take it an hour before you have sex, (and we don’t usually think about it that far in advance, it just happens. We also make love a LOT in the morning, My Man gets up VERY early, I’d have to set my alarm for, like 3:00 AM to take the damn blue pill at the right time. And then what if one of the kids wakes up, or he’s running late and we don’t get to? $20.00 down the drain and a VERY horny upset lady.)

I was given Estrogen creme, which I was afraid to use, because estrogen in the Pill used to really make my migraines worse, but I did anyway, the creme has had no effect on my headaches. There’s a prescription called “Estra-test” which is estrogen and testosterone, and if my GYN won’t prescribe either that or at least testosterone injections, I am going to see someone else who will do this.

I hate having to worry every time “OMG, is it going to happen? Is it going to take an hour? What if he gets bored?” ect. NONE of this is good for an otherwise great sex life. (He doesn’t get bored, but he has fallen asleep a few times, which did not make ME a happy lady.) And I love my sex toys, but don’t want to HAVE to use them every time.

It is frustrating as hell. WHY does no one talk about how perimenopause may do this to you? All I knew about (and I’m a nurse with a Master’s) was hot flashes, night sweats, “increased fat deposits” and “thinning vaginal tissue.” NOBODY said anything about “taking all day to have an orgasm, and maybe sometimes not getting to have one at all.”

As for ss’s suggestion for literature, I have found Violet Blue and Alison Tyler’s women’s erotica collections from a variety of authors to be VERY helpful. Good stuff.

By: Camelia

Camelia — Fri, 05 Feb 2010 06:55:41 +0000

Testosterone helps me have orgasms more easily. After I started going through menopause, it seemed to take forever to reach orgasm. Sensation in the clitoris seemed be down 100-fold. Testosterone brought me back to pre-menstrual sensitivity.

By: ss

ss — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 22:00:53 +0000

I was in the same boat recently (married, 46, 3 kids), use to be up for it all the time when I was younger, then kids, etc happened, and libido went out the window. I think part of the problem is that we stop thinking about sex, whereas men fantasize about it frequently. Strange but true: I found that once I started thinking about sex again, I started wanting to have it again (a lot!), and I did this by reading (brace yourself)romance novels. I’m a former English major, and previously had nothing but scorn for books like those those, but after one of my teenage daughter’s friends left a few at our house, and I picked one up out of curiosity, I was hooked! My husband said, “I don’t know what you’ve been reading, but tell me where I can buy them to keep you in constant supply.” Seriously, it’s a cheap solution/suggestion, unlike medication or counselling, give it a try! Recommended: Gena Showalter, Emma Holly, Lora Leigh, Kresley Cole to get you started. Oh, and buy some decent lube, not KY.

By: Madamoiselle L

Madamoiselle L — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 17:55:52 +0000

From what my personal GYN said to me, Viagra is only prescribed for women who HAVE a healthy libido, but are having trouble reaching orgasm. It works for some, not for others. It seems to only work for this problem when women have normal female levels of testosterone, as well.

As others have said, it doesn’t nor promote desire, just helps with blood flow to the clitoris (so it can become engorged enough to trigger and orgasm) in women who may be having climax problems due to perimenopause or certain illnesses.

As most insurance companies will NOT pay for this drug for women, (even including the ones who pay for it for men) and they cost about $20.00 or more a pill, most women in this case are out of luck, unless they are rich.

As for helping your libido, HAVING sex actually releases hormones and changes blood flow to make it easier to FEEL aroused more often. The more you do it, they more you’ll want it, most of the time. A lot of women (as long as there aren’t any significant trauma problems) find that just DOING IT more frequently will do wonders for their libido.

By: emandlo

emandlo — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 17:09:31 +0000

Britni: In Dr. Vanessa’s defense, it was the reader who mentioned Viagra casually and we (Em & Lo) just went with it because we found this funny picture (more ethereal things like libido — or a lackthereof — are hard to illustrate photographically). But thanks for the clarification!

By: Lady

Lady — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 16:46:29 +0000

Wellbutrin and its generic, buproprion, can help women with libido issues. It seems that anything that boosts the dopamine increases libido.

By: Britni

Britni — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 13:43:30 +0000

I think it’s important to clear up a common misconception about ED medications. Viagra does NOT increase libido. It helps with erectile dysfucntion. The man WANTS sex, but cannot physically get an erection. If a man with ED did not want to have sex with someone, Viagra wouldn’t make him aroused and give him an erection. He has to be aroused for that to happen.

So calling Viagra a “libido booster” is a misnomer.