Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: “Why do guys seem to dislike giving oral sex more than woman seem to dislike giving it?“
Gay Married Guy (Jon Ross): I’ve met a bunch of straight men and woman who dislike the pastime, which is a bit of a mystery to me — most gays just love the activity! One in my position can only speculate, but I wonder if it’s a fear of “the other” that has some people so squeamish. Sure, everyone loves sex, but some just want to keep to keep everything perfectly aligned, mouth to mouth, genitalia to genitalia. I bet the people who shy away from oral sex are just unfamiliar with how everything works down there or fear they’ll get a mouthful of a bodily fluid.
Straight Single Guy (Chris): I hate to disappoint you, but we don’t all dislike giving oral. I’m not fishing for dates here, but I personally love giving as much as receiving. I promise I can have that verified for you. I think many guys are just too anxious to get to sex. I suppose I was too when I was younger. Now that I’m a little older, I’m much more interested in leaving a good impression. My recovery time isn’t the same as it once was either, so I guess I’m compensating somewhat, but I remember always being pretty into it. I don’t know if there’s a secret. Ladies, keep things nice and trim down there: consider going with a complete “no spin zone” or maybe even a vajazzling to try to drum up some interest. (He should do be willing to do the same for you.) And speaking of reciprocation, remember the golden rule: if you give good head then hopefully you’ll get good head in return. I guess the only other advice I can give if you’re still having trouble is that you can find me on Facebook pretty easily…
Straight Married Guy (Mike): Who said that men dislike giving oral sex? Nothing is more arousing than the smell of a woman. So, just for selfish reasons, oral is a great way to start. However, there are obviously men who are repelled by the idea and women who are self-conscious, but it’s nothing that a little personal hygiene won’t cure. As for women, there seems to be much more pressure and expectation to expertly perform orally — the blowjob is a fixture of porn and is practically de rigueur. I wonder how many women really enjoy being a service provider? With either, a little communication would go a long way: as exciting as oral sex can be, there’s also nothing worse than when it is half-hearted.
Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors. This week’s Straight Married Guy is James Glazebrook of Manflet, our Straight Single Guy is Chris DiClerico, and our Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross of Boerum Hill Blog. To ask the guys your own question, click here.
December 26th, 2010 at 5:53 pm
i love the smell of balls, penis, a mans body hmm. i love a man to have lot of hair, especially down there he musnt shave! I know some men who do.i love to be nice and smooth for my man. i love dressing up for my man. as long as its clean down there ill suck him, and sometims it turns me on more when im giving him as much pleasure as possible, becuase it turns me on when hes turned on. i suppose im a giver. i have a fetish for my man to have their clothes on during sex, and for us to have quickies! i always suck him then go on top of him and have sex lol the best way for me to enjoy and get pleasure, and he seems happy too ;’)
February 13th, 2011 at 11:29 pm
I’d rather a man not have hair down there. With that said, I love to give blowjobs. Though I won’t say it, I want the reciprocation and I want him to enjoy it, not act like it’s a duty. “Just think of England” guys are a profound turn off.
July 5th, 2011 at 9:18 pm
I think there is a large percentage of men who enjoy giving oral sex to women, but there are those who are opposed to it. I think these men are hesitant because of thier lack of knowledge of the genitalia. I often notice the guys who like to go downtown tend to be more experienced and better in bed. So ladies don’t feel bad and think it’s you, most likely case scenario is they are frightened they won’t be good at it and don’t take criticism well.
September 27th, 2011 at 1:29 am
I love my boyfriend very much and the sex is wonderful but I hate the fact that I give him oral sex allllll the time and I can’t get it in return. I tried talking to him about it but he says its not his thing, what should I do?