And having been that young man who “waited” right along with her, my advice to guys is always to move on if you’re not getting laid in a time frame that you find acceptable. Waiting sucks, especially considering that it might not even happen. Don’t pressure her. Don’t “communicate” about it. Just leave and find a woman who’s on the same page as you.

In Western culture, pre-marital sex is common and an important part of a relationship for the majority of men. A man regarding sex as an important part of a relationship is just as an acceptable sexual preference as you regarding sex as strictly a marital act. By deciding to wait until marriage, you are therefore going to be ‘sexually incompatible’ with the majority of men you meet. Just in the same way two incompatible personalities won’t make a good relationship, neither will sexual incompatibility.

What’s happened in the past is that you’ve established a relationship with men who you are not so sexually compatible with and these men have left when that incompatibility has emerged. Not your fault, not their fault, just simple dating forces at play.

So, to stand a good chance of meeting the minority men who are sexually compatible (i.e. are happy to wait), you’ll need to increase the number of single men you meet. Be upfront about your preferences early in the dating game and you’ll ensure that you don’t waste time pursuing incompatible men who will break up with you when they realise you both want different things. Seeking a social group where such preferences are more common (e.g. Christian church group) will tilt the balance in your favour. Just be aware that pure statistics dictate that the older you get, the fewer similarly aged single men will be available.

So in summary, stop being so bitter about the fact that the majority of men want something different to you, and instead focus your efforts on meeting the minority of men who are compatible. Meet lots of men, and pick a social group where the compatible proportion is higher. Be open with your preferences earlier in the dating game to reduce the time you spend chasing incompatible people, and you’ll do fine. Good luck!

Now I am with the love of my life and he was more inexperienced than me when we first met but because of my experience, I could show him what I liked and things have gone really steamy. He was really impressed with me and told me no other girl had never made so much effort in foreplay.

While I’m not saying go and jump in bed with the next guy you see, you do need find out what makes you tick in sex because just because you are compatible in other ways it doesn’t automatically make you sexually compatible and vice versa.

It took time, work and patience for us to be where we are even though we fell for each other instantly and even more so when we realised how compatible we are as a couple. I do recommend watching Em & Lo’s Sex: How to do Everything because although you may not agree with everything shown, sex is not black and white. There are many weird and wonderful components to it.

My bf loves me and respects me but it doesn’t mean I’m going to hold sex back from him. It’s part of one of our many expressions of love to each other which include talking to each other everyday (we are long distance), poems, gifts & cuddles and not a day goes by where we don’t tell each other “I love you” but we are animals and sex is a primal thing as well as an uncensored love expression.

I think if you are trying to test whether a guy respects you or not, then sex is not the only factor. Does he listen to you? Does he make a mental note of things you like and then do something spontaneous about it? Does he make you laugh?

Maybe you could try long distance as that involves a lot of talking and less opportunities for touching but after meeting a guy in person first- always safer. If he puts the effort into the relationship, then go for it with him because hell you need to show him you fancy him back.

An example is my bf will visit me just for the day to spend time with me regardless of whether “action” is involved or not. He will wake up at 6 am to catch trains and coaches to be here for 11 am and then go back in the evening (because he works) and not be home until 11 pm.

I understand where you’re coming from but you need to look at sex like a slice of pizza. It’s just one slice of a relationship but it’s still there. You would never expect a pizza with one piece missing to be delivered to you.

You don’t know what will happen. Any guy is capable of heartbreak as much as the right one is capable of loving you for you. I’ve had my heart broken by more bfs I haven’t slept with. You’ll never live if you fear the future.