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Overnight Handbag: How to Prepare for a Casual Sleepover

Thu, Jul 1, 2010

Advice, How To

photo by dunikowski

Ladies, if there’s any chance your evening will end up in a sleepover, transform your purse into a make-shift washbag. Even if there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell you’ll be getting nooky tonight, carry these items with you anyway ‚ÄĒ because the best hook-ups happen when you least expect them.

  1. Compact ballet flats. Don’t be caught making the walk of shame home at 7am in your uncomfortable six-inch disco stilettos. Comfortable “City Slips” (fold up flats) and “After Soles” (roll up flats) can transform that journey home into a walk of fame.
  2. Condoms. Even if you’re on the Pill, or some other form of birth control, do not assume that it’s the guy’s responsibility to provide the STD protection, simply because he’s the one to wear it. You are responsible for your own sexual health. Plus, there’s nothing worse than running out of safety socks when you’re both up for round two!
  3. Mascara & moisturizing lipstick. You don’t need your whole ten-pound makeup bag, just these two essentials. The mascara will brighten up tired eyes in the morning. And a moisturizing lipstick will add color while soothing lips chapped from kissing. The lipstick can even double as impromptu rouge (though your cheeks will probably already be flushed from the evening’s activities). With these simple tools, you’ll look bright and fresh in the morning, without looking overdone.
  4. Dissolvable breath strips. A toothbrush and toothpaste, even travel-sized, is a bit much to tote around all evening. But you don’t want to be chomping on a piece of gum like a cow, either after dinner or before breakfast (before you’re ready to get out of bed and clean your teeth). Minty breath strips are powerful and dissolve quickly, so you can get onto more important things.
  5. A tank top. If what you’re wearing out that night will look funny on a commuter train home in the morning (or out at brunch), then pack something small you can wear as a top alternative. Nothing gives away a one-night stand like a sequined halter top glittering in the morning light. Note: If you are attending a super fancy affair, either bring a purse which can hold a casual skirt too or don’t sleepover (a girl’s gotta have her dignity).
  6. A book of matches. Speaking of dignity, should you find yourself in the unfortunate and unlucky situation of being stuck in his bathroom in desperate need of a room deodorizer, light a match, quickly blow it out, and flush it down the toilet.
  7. A razor. If you’re one of those women who can’t stand her own stubble, carry a razor in your purse. Because if you end up at his place, chances are he’ll have some shaving cream in his bathroom that you can borrow for a quick touch up. Remember, men can be very territorial about their razors, and nothing’s more annoying to him than nicking his neck the next day because you dulled his Mach 3 with your leg hair ‚ÄĒ and yes, he’ll always be able to tell.
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12 Responses to “Overnight Handbag: How to Prepare for a Casual Sleepover”

  1. sugarmag Says:

    really? Bring a razor (not to mention a change of clothes, shoes, and make up) but not a toothbrush? You’ve got to be kidding me. If he has shaving cream he has toothpaste, and even brushing with just water is better than not brushing at all. I can go one morning without shaving, but I have to brush my teeth.

  2. Sundae Says:

    I’d have to agree with sugarmag, if as a lady you have no shame about toting around a whole new outfit and a freakin’ razor, a toothbrush barely even rates on the carrying-your-life-around-with-you scale.

  3. figleaf Says:

    “…nothing‚Äôs more annoying to him than nicking his neck the next day because you dulled his Mach 3 with your leg hair.”

    Thank you, thank you, thank you! We can tell because it _hurts!_ And for whatever reason leg hair is way, way tougher on razors than pubic or facial hair. Also sharing a stranger’s (or even non-long-term partner’s) nicks and cuts from razor isn’t quite as risky as not bothering with a condom, but it’s not exactly “safe sex” either.

    I agree with Sugarmag, though, that if you’ve got room for a razor you’ve also got room for a toothbrush. Conversely, if all you’ve got room for is a pack of breath strips, how are you going to have room for a razor as well?

    figleaf

  4. PK Says:

    Although, I’ve gotta say as a sailor I’m used to packing very light for overnight races and it’s pretty easy to find shirts and shorts that roll up into a very small size. From what i’ve seen outdoor stores (REI and other athletics outfitters like Athleta for women) seem to have casual dresses that could easily withstand a night in a handbag and, at least to this guy, look fantastic.

  5. Jen Says:

    If you need to spend the next morning in the shower shaving your legs or worrying about bathroom smells, then the sex wasn’t worth having, nor is the person you had it with if he’s going to dump you because you have a day’s worth of stubble. A book of matches? What guy over 12 years of age doesn’t realize that women poop too? Who doesn’t find the smell of sulphur even more revolting and identifying than a bowel movement?

    Why perpetuate the ‘walk of shame’ stereotype? There should be nothing shameful at all about having had sex the night before if you’re both adults, unless you’re trying to reinforce the stereotypes that women who have ‘casual sleepovers’ are sluts.

    If you need to go to work directly from bed then obviously you need to look professional, in which case you call a cab a few hours in advance (pro-tip…most people have alarm clocks) in your disheveled clothing and go home and shower and change.

    Helpful ‘casual sleepover advice’ would encompass the “I loved the sex, but I don’t want to give you my phone number” to the “I ditched all of my friends at the bar for this gorgeous guy who happened to be lousy in the sack and now how do I make it up to them” internal monologue, to how do you surreptitiously find out what address you are at so that you can call a cab, to how do you tell the guy who was a casual hookup that you’d like to see him again?

    I expect better from you two, because I’ve read your columns for years. There isn’t a need to make women feel ashamed because they spent a night having sex with someone, or to encourage the myth that we all have to be beautiful all the time. Screw the mascara moisturizing lipstick and pack the number of a good delivery service instead..if there’s anything better than a great morning after feast with someone new and exciting, I’ve rarely come across it.

  6. Ash Says:

    What? A razor? Ridiculous, my bf always laugh at me because I usually bring a pair of shorts and a tank top over to change into but who the hell wants to walk the dorms in a mini skirt and skank top at 2pm?

  7. nick Says:

    i kind of agree with Jen. what’s wrong with being proud that you got laid. If the next day you are ashamed about WHO you were with, that you need to examine yourself and make some mature changes.

    Having had the sex in an of it’s self you should be proud of. what to bring, i TOTALLY agree with the condom “better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it” the change of shoes is a good idea, and your own tooth brush is a good idea (though borrowing a tooth brush after the intense making out probably isn’t as big of an issue as people make it out to be)

    everything else is unnecessary. Why walk home in shame. after you sleep with the guy, he should be more than happy to let you stay until the afternoon if you feel more comfortable that way. Then he should be glad to drive you home, and it’s only right for him to walk you to the door.
    how is THAT a walk of shame.

  8. S Says:

    If you don’t know your partner well enough that you feel embarrassed to have them discover you are one of those disgusting women who POOP, perhaps you shouldn’t be sleeping with them.

  9. Madamoiselle L Says:

    It’s been a LONG time since I’ve had to worry about this, but I would NEVER go without a toothbrush. Yuck. Luckily, Colgate makes a little disposable toothbrush which takes up only a little room in your bag. Otherwise, you may end up rinsing with Scotch the morning after, like Elizabeth Taylor did, in Butterfield Eight.

    http://www.colgatewisp.com/wisp/HomePage?cid=ppc_gg_nb_stan_Wisp_Broad_disposable+toothbrush

    IMO, that, CHEAP ballet flats (you can get them for between $5.00 and $10.00 at discount stores) and definitely under eye cover up and eye LINER (both do most of us more good than mascara, when we’re in a hurry, at least for those of us with slightly more Mediterranean or Latina complexions) and you’re good to go…..home.

    It would NEVER have occurred to be to ever bring a razor. To each her own. The tank top is a good idea. The condoms, go without saying, although it should be said.

  10. dysgrace Says:

    obviously, the solution to this is to have the gentleman over to your place, and then you can shoo him gently out the door (after breakfast – it’s only polite) while you shower, shave and doll up in peace.

    if you must sleep over i understand the tank top and flats for pure comfort, and while you’re toting half an outfit around, might as well throw in a pair of underwear and a toothbrush too. how about some flip flops? (i’d like to see the size of THAT party clutch-bag.)

    …but a razor????? how insecure are you that you need to ‘touch up’ every morning?

  11. Steven Says:

    While my girl doesn’t REQUIRE a razor, it makes her more comfortable. I.E. if she doesn’t have it, I can’t touch her legs, unless she has jeans, which she does because she is at my place so often (still in college, and about an hour and half away from each other, ONLY reason we haven’t moved in yet). As far as a tooth brush, in my experience with friends, if there is ANY chance of nookie at all they keep a spare toothbrush at their place. Any guy who doesn’t is rude. If you must shave, please bring a razor, or shave after we do, and let us know. It does hurt. She did it once with mine (it was new) and didn’t let me know (she thought it was no big deal, most things aren’t), needed to pull out a new razor. got three nicks doing half of my face. thought it was the razor till she told me over breakfast. (and now I make sure she has a razor at my place, I tend to learn after one mishap).
    Sorry about the long rant, hope it helps.

  12. Dr Prosciutto Says:

    Sharing a razor is riskier. HIV and Hepatitis C are much more transmissible by blood.


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