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Wise Guys: What Do Guys Think of Au Naturel?

Tue, Jul 20, 2010

Advice, Wise Guys

photo by Ollie Crafoord

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, What do guys think when a woman doesn’t trim, shave or wax her pubic hair at all?

anonymous_suitStraight Single Guy (Max): My rule is simple: if I can get through the forest and perform certain acts without being inhibited, then I don’t care. That being said, I would much rather go down on a girl than have her go down on me (which I know is somewhat rare), so my preference is easy access. Do you ladies understand how rad it is to hear, see and feel you freaking out when we go down on you? It’s awesome. Especially when you’re completely comfortable with it. Keeping it completely bare is not necessary but I confess that when a girl is freshly waxed we can BOTH have a lot more fun.

wiseguy_benStraight Married Guy (Ben): It sort of depends. If there’s some thought behind it, like she’s a hippy or a really old school feminist – in other words, if she’s not shaving/ waxing/ trimming on purpose – then it doesn’t really matter to me. The fact that she’s deliberately making an aesthetic choice about her pubes makes all the difference. But if she’s just being lazy or not putting in the effort, well then that actually says a lot — much more than what’s actually going on down there. Of course, realize that if you do make that choice not to do any upkeep, you’re going against what a lot of guys are hoping / expecting to find (see other Manhandled columns here and here). So if you do want to go for that “overgrown look” then I’ll give you this quick tip: popping out of the top of the underwear or bikini is way sexier than coming out of the sides. In fact, a bit of bush overflowing the top of some low cut panties can actually be pretty darn hot.

Gay Single Guy (Bradford Shellhammer): I know what gay guys would do. They would hold you down, pin back your arms, and call for back-up. Shaving it all away, I find, is weird and kinda upsetting. But everyone should trim: your eyebrows, your nose-hairs, your hair on your head, back hair, and yes, down there. Say “We’re animals and it belongs there” and I might upchuck on you. Some things in nature need to be cleaned up. Not removed. But cleaned up. Like a lawn. Letting it go is just troublesome.

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Ben, a writer and artist living in Los Angeles who runs AdultParlorGames.com; our Gay Guy is fellow SUN blogger Bradford Shellhammer, the creative director of fabulis and a New York Times featured decorator; and our Single Straight Guy, Max, is a recent college grad in New England. To ask the guys your own question, click here.

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26 Responses to “Wise Guys: What Do Guys Think of Au Naturel?”

  1. Johnny Says:

    Natural bush is very unsightly – deal-breakingly so, for me. Suppose I never groomed my head or face – I’d be considered a slob, right? I never got why hair elsewhere on the body should be any different.

    My personal depilatory regimen rivals any woman’s. When I started living with my GF and she saw how much time I spend shaving, trimming and plucking, she was like, “damn…”

  2. Bettyboo Says:

    no offense Johnny but I’m not sure there is much I would find more of a turn off than finding a guy has waxed, trimmed or plucked all his body hair into oblivion.. If my guy started using tweezers for anything more than removing splinters I think I would start to have serious reservations, just not sexy to me.. plus, one of my greatest achievements lately is managing to swallow so much of him that my nose was buried in his pubes and that was pretty damn sexy.. :0) fortunately I’m with one of the few remaining guys who prefer au naturel, so other than a little off the sides for tidiness in my swimming cossie I’m very happily as nature intended, in fact my cute little bush is my favourite bits of me :0)

  3. Johnny Says:

    ^None taken! Although I’m not plucked or shaved “to oblivion”… the reason my routine takes so long is that I try to make it look “natural” – hence my girlfriend’s surprise. I used to shave much more, but, like you said, girls told me it was weird. Go figure. Just shaving everything was much faster!

    BTW, is there a trick to your latest, greatest achievement? My little lady is on the same mission but can’t do it.

  4. Bettyboo Says:

    fair enough :0) my main objection would be to not looking natural plus saving makes things scratchy so if your regimen enhances your naturalness then why not.. ;0)

    I started on my personal quest when I discovered a) that my best friend could do it (nothing like a bit of rivalry) and b) that whenever I went a bit deeper when we were in 69 he reacted by doing a special something to my clit that just made me explode.. which was a very good incentive and it made it a huge turn on for me too.. for us it works best in 69 with him on top so I can tilt my head back slightly and trust him with the movement and I can deepen it by moving my head up if I want :0) It also seems to help if he’s not totally hard when we start so he gradually increases in size as we go along and I relax into it.. you just have to think swallowing rather than worry about gagging, after all we all swallow many times a day without incident, and get into the moment.. We’ve not absolutely perfected it yet as he still has to be a bit careful so ironically it’s actually better for me as I always come from what he’s doing with his tongue plus the idea that he’s f*cking my face seems to be a big turn on but he can’t quite let go enough to tip him over the edge without worrying about suffocating me but we’re working on it.. ;0) practise, as they say, make’s perfect :0) and I’m very happy practising :0)

  5. BCofUIMhere Says:

    Grrr…I’m really starting to hate this topic, b/c it’s everywhere! “Natural=dirty” “Bare=sexy” Screw it. If you bathe on a regular basis, you’re *not* dirty. As for the sexiness of a bare crotch – my ex decided to “surprise” me with shaving his — and I *was* surprised, because the bareness made his genitals look ridiculously small. And when we had sex, he started “ouch”ing because my pubes were poking him (which was not an issue when he had pubes). So he wanted me to go bare too. I didn’t want to, but to please him (his bareness was not about pleasing *me*), I shaved…and ended up with ingrown pubic hairs that got infected and had to be treated by my doctor! Embarrassment, pain, expensive medication, and a red, itchy, pus-y pussy…now THAT’S sexy!

  6. Bettyboo Says:

    I’m in the natural camp, much sexier to have hair to play with and I love the warm natural smell of my guy’s hairy bits.. :0) he seems to feel the same so all is well :0) I’ve been in your place BCofUIMhere with an ex who pushed and pushed till i gave in and it itched like hell when shaved and immac etc burnt and I felt so unnatural so I stood up for myself (for once) and said no more.. on the other side of the coin all he ever d*ck ‘to make it look bigger’ which may have worked on a one nighter but is a little pointless in a LTR when you know exactly what size it is.. ;0) far as I’m concerned as it comes (with options for a little minor groomage of outliers) is definitely sexiest :0)

  7. Coralie Says:

    I like to trim and edge things, but I have to leave some hair there – if it all comes off I find myself ridiculously turned on constantly and it makes it very difficult to get anything done!

  8. Collie Says:

    I have to say, I like it both ways. For myself, I prefer not to shave or wax because I find it uncomfortable to shave and I don’t have the money to wax.

    However, my pubic hair can get pretty long. That is to say, if I go too long without trimming it, it actually gets in the way of having sex. So, while I neither shave nor wax, I do trim, almost obsessively. I have hair, but it is very neat, and this is how my husband likes it also.

  9. Johnny Says:

    A lot of people are hung up on the trauma of a razor-shave here, but there’s much middle ground between big natural bush and bald.

    The question was about TOTALLY ungroomed pubes, which I do find gross. But I never insisted that any woman in my life shave. A short, neat trim job is fine. Any woman who won’t do that, for ideological reasons or just because she’s lazy, is definitely not the woman for me.

  10. Leslie Says:

    The Husband could really care less. I trim b/c I feel more comfortable and less likely to sweat in that area. My husband trims his as well, but it’s an aesthetic choice of his. I can’t say I mind, but I probably wouldn’t notice if he didn’t.

  11. Savannah Says:

    For myself I like it waxed bare nice and smooth. On my men, I like to see some body hair just keep it neat. Lately I have been having problems with ingrown hairs though can’t figure it out cause I’ve waxed forever with no problems?
    To Johnny: Your girl needs to first be into the said “mission” for her own love of doing it, she needs to let her self relax and her throat and mind won’t “panic” for lack of a better way to say it…lol Tell her to breath rhythmicaly nice and slow through her nose while she has you in her throat. Also, she should control the action until she is comfortable…you be as still as you can (yes that takes control on your part) ;) Last but most importanlty practice and have fun! Before too long she’ll have it ummm “down”..lol and you can start directing the action and thrusting more. Good Luck!

  12. Elisabeth Says:

    I started to shave bc of the swimsuit issue. I didn’t like hair sticking out. I wasn’t sure how far I could go down but have figured out an okay system that my guy likes. I also keep clean. My guy “man-scapes” as well and puts lotion on. We are really into each other.

  13. greg Says:

    as long when I look at her she doesn’t look like she has buckwheat in a headlock than i’m fine, I prefer short but it’s what she is comfortable with. I have shaved for several years my wife has just started getting comfortable with doing a close trim but not a clean shave for herself.

  14. SS Says:

    @greg “Buckwheat in a head lock”……sweet jesus,I will be taking that image to the grave, and stocking up on venus refill blades. Tooooo funny!!

  15. Black Iris Says:

    This is one of those times when it’s nice to be older. I am so glad guys never expected me to pour hot wax on the most sensitive part of my body!

  16. JR Says:

    For the missus, I prefer her bare, but a little landing strip is ok. She pefers the same for me.

    Big bushy is just not my thing. Generally speaking, guys are visual and I’m no different.

  17. Jenn Says:

    A man can expect me to wax my genitals after he waxes his. Trimming- I’m all about it, but waxing? You’ve got to be joking.

  18. Anais Says:

    Glad this has come up! I have been absolutely mystified why removing one’s pubic hair could ever be thought of as sexy! Back in the 70′s many women were fighting with the docs to NOT shave us when we gave birth as it was viewed by us to be degrading and about men wanting us to look like children,it did not reduce infection rates, but INCREASED them; we interperate the practice as one of an attempt to DE-sex us.It was an issue of who controlled our bodies. We thought that guys who were into their women sporting what are now called “brazillians” were closet pedophiles, and we were horrified.We were comfortable with our bodies; pubic hair our southern crowning glory…the curls that we and our lovers toyed with, the shine, the “real” blondes,not wearing panties and feeling the sexiness of the feel of summer breezes tickling our airy furbelows. Razor stubble, wax burns and red infected skin bumps are NOT sexy.The time it takes could be put to better use pleasuring ourselves or our lovers; that part of our body should be treated to as much pleasure and fun as possible. Waxing, shaving lasering-NOT FUN.

  19. Sugarmag Says:

    Anais,whether to remove pubic hair is a personal choice. When you say “we” you mean “I” you are talking about your own preferences and choices. Some women like the way it feels to be bare down there and that their choice.

    Here is what I think. Do what feels right for you. If you do not want to remove hair down there and your partner wants you to, he is not the guy for you. If he likes it and you like it, then everyone wins. My body, my choice. Is that not what we feminists have been fighting for? I’ll shave if I want to.

  20. Gabbi Says:

    I think one of the points Anais is getting at, Sugarmag, is that we should all be questioning why we “want” to. What do you get or expect to get by shaving? Many people have already pointed out the physical pain that can result, in various ways. So what is the real reason or reasons why people are willing to subject themselves to pain or the potential for pain (including infection)? And are those reasons something you want to “fight for”?

    I’m not saying that it’s impossible to have a good reason to shave/wax/whatever, but when it comes to our personal aesthetic decisions it’s always a good idea to deconstruct ourselves every once in a while.

  21. sugarmag Says:

    This is not about whether I personally shave (I am not a very hairy person anyway and I would not have sex with a man who expected me to keep my pubic area shaved). What I have a hard time with is telling other women what they “should” do.

    I agree that it can be healthy to deconstruction oneself, to question one’s preferences. I just have a problem with anyone telling women what our preferences and personal choices should be. The right to decide what to do with my own body is something I feel strongly about, and I have a strong negative reaction to anyone telling me what I should feel or what I should like.

  22. Freida Says:

    What does Max mean about being able to see, hear, and feel a girl freaking out? Is a natural bush so enormous that he’s completely sensory-deprived?

  23. LambChop Says:

    I must disagree with Anais on “Waxing shaving lasering –NOT FUN.”

    Shaving does sort of suck because of the stubble. Lasering hurts like hell. Waxing is sort of fun, and the end result? Amazingly soft skin — FUN!

  24. loosegoose Says:

    I find that body hair on a gal is a big turn on for me (almost a fetish), as long as she is clean and takes care of herself. It may be that I love the contrast since, as a man, I have an unbelievably small amount of hair on my body naturally. I didn’t have any whatsoever until I turned 19. One girl I dated noticed I had a thing for the fur on her body and completely stopped shaving. I was astounded at the amount of beautiful hair that adorned her all over. She loved to place her hairy legs and arms right next to my smooth hairless ones. She would tease me about what a little boy I was as her fluffy hairs would rub up against my skin, driving me crazy. I was so turned on by her, yet at the same time so jealous that she could grow all that hair and I was so immature in comparison. I say throw away the razors.

  25. Cortney Says:

    I choose to trim things up a bit so it looks neat & clean but going bald is definitely not my thing.keeping it trimmed & cute is acceptable for me and my man.

  26. TheScouticus Says:

    I, personally, keep mine trimmed back most of the time.
    But if I want to pamper myself, sometimes I’ll go to the spa and get a brazilian with a landing strip.
    I don’t really like shaved, or completely bald. Shaved is itchy, and completely bald makes it seem like a little kid’s.
    But it’s all up to personal preference I guess. Each to their own.


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