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Wise Guys: Gagging During Oral — Hot or Not?

Tue, May 10, 2011

Advice, Wise Guys

photo by Public Domain Photos

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: What do men think about a woman gagging while giving oral sex? How does the fact that it’s a porn trope affect your real life experiences? Is it a turn on or do most men just feel bad for the woman because she’s obviously uncomfortable?”
Gay Single Guy (Angelo Nikolopoulos): As someone who’s been both gagee and gagger, I’m conflicted. While it is thrilling to imagine that your tool is insurmountably large, having your partner on the perpetual verge of tears/ralphing can’t, I imagine, be that sexy. So here’s some practical advice for the Gagging Gal: behold The Python: he sits up and you lie on your side behind him so you can coil around his waist and come at his unit from one side (and slightly above). I find the penile trajectory to be, well, more palatable in this position—though peppering in a few well-timed gags couldn’t hurt either.

Straight Committed Guy (Johnny): For me, it’s a turn-on to watch. What can I say? Like many men I’ve had my brain warped by pornography. That said, I’ve only ever met one woman who said she liked being gagged (I never did find out for myself). Most women I’ve talked to about blowjobs or have been with personally — even the kinkiest ones — are really turned off by gagging. Degredation aside, the sensation of almost puking is awful. The closest I’ve ever come to receiving this experience is gagging on a tongue depressor at the doctors office, and that was anything but hot. So I’ve relegated the gag thing to the bin of over-the-line fantasy — those fantasies which one can not reasonably expect a partner to indulge, like doodoo fantasies or bestiality ones. I wouldn’t want a woman to do something in bed that she hates.

P.S. Did you know that the scientific name for… I can’t think of a polite way to describe the behavior… anyway, it’s called “irrumatio.” Now you know, if you didn’t already.

chris_diclericoStraight Single Guy (Chris): I personally don’t like the idea of a girl choking and crying and throwing up on my penis, but certainly love how a proper deep-throat blowjob feels. I am not into the domination thing but I imagine there are guys that love the feeling of power they have over their partner, and get a combination of domination and ego boost from thinking that their penis is so big the girl can’t handle it. And it probably feels pretty good. I’m just not into it at all. Either way, I think porn plays a big factor. It seems that the gagging blowjob has become super commonplace in porn and guys who are prone to this kind of domination behavior must love the idea. (Please bear in mind that I’ve met one or two women who swear they love it too…)

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Gay Guy is Angelo Nikolopoulos, host of an NYC queer reading series The White Swallow; Straight Single Guy is blogger Chris DiClerico; and our Straight Committed Guy is regular EMandLO.com commenter, Johnny. To ask the guys your own question, click here.

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17 Responses to “Wise Guys: Gagging During Oral — Hot or Not?”

  1. stephan Says:

    why does only the gay guy have a picture of himself?

  2. matbo Says:

    wow I never knew gagging was such a thing. Whatever – I’m a bomb in the sack, I’m not gonna start explodin’ in other ways.

  3. misspiggy Says:

    but if you’ve been gallantly fighting down your gag reflex so as not to upset your blowee, and then realise he’s actually turned on by you openly gagging, then it’s a win win situation!

  4. eric Says:

    as a guy, I don’t really find it that attractive. seeing it in porn makes me feel sorry for the girl involved…but she’s getting paid to do it. I think it’s much sexier for a girl to be able to handle the penis deep in the throat without gagging.

  5. Karen Affeldt Says:

    Years of practice has resulted in me being able to take it all the way down without gagging. Maybe that’s a bad thing.

  6. anonymous Says:

    Is the gagging in porn a new thing? (Like, in the last decade?) My recollection was that the women in porn tended to take it in pretty deep without gagging.

    I have a very strong gag reflex. In high school, I threw up on a guy’s dick. (Though, I managed to create a seal with my lips, pull off and run to the bathroom without getting any on him. He didn’t know what had happened until I told him. I’m actually pretty proud of how I handled such a disastrous turn of events.)

    I would love to be able to take it all the way down. The one guy I’ve been with whose penis was on the smaller side absolutely raved about my blow jobs, and I loved being able to do that for him.

    I know my husband would love for me to take him further in, but he would never make a big deal about it. I use a hand around the base to control the depth, but I’m going to try Angelo’s trick now.

  7. Tony Says:

    If you’re keeping a tally, please enter my response in the NOT HOT column. Thank you.

  8. Anathema Says:

    Oh for cryin’ out loud. I mean, if you don’t like it you don’t like it and that’s fine, but gagging and throwing up are not synonymous. I think it might be a little bit more of a kink thing . . . I identify as a bottom w/ submissive tendencies, and I am really turned on by being gagged. I guess I’m lucky in that I don’t have a very strong gag reflex, but that feeling over being choked and overwhelmed is really exciting (my last boyfriend was well endowed but not crazily so. The guy I’m dating now is very large, so while it’s a bit of an adjustment, we’re making it work). The rule I’ve used for deep-throating / throat-fucking is to have a nonverbal safeword. I want him to essential force me to take it, and not to let me up even if I struggle, but if I reach up and tap on his chest, that means, “no, I really want to stop.” I’ve only felt like I might throw up once, not sure why–combo of angle, maybe something I’d eaten, who knows. Tapping out worked, and all was well.

  9. guy Says:

    I’m with the first guy. I love it and porn is more than likely to blame. Hardcore porn is gonna be hardcore, the sex is supposed to be rough and usually centered around the guy dominating, face banging is just a part of that.

  10. Mandy Says:

    well i done gagging tonight and found it a real turn on i can’t wait for next time x

  11. Deepthroat Says:

    I’ve had some guys so thin & pretty short (like 5 inches) who thought I cannot deepthroat, but what they didn’t realize is their penis is simply too small so they’ll never be able to get DT. Now, on to penises that can reach deep in the throat, with some guys they are so damn huge I find I just need to warm up a little to do it w/o gagging. If I’m doing the deepthroating I don’t gag, but its when they grab my damn head & face f-ck the hell out of me is when I’ll gag & tear up, never to the point of vomiting though cause I still am pretty skilled.

  12. Greg Says:

    I don’t mind gagging at all . She’ll get over it. It feels good when she tightens her throat

  13. Reality Check Says:

    Personally I hate the trend in modern porn to basically force a gag response from the woman giving head. Not only is it not sexy, to me it crosses a line in my mind from a couple enjoying sex together, and into one person using and abusing another just to get their own rocks off. Not hot or sexy, just unpleasant.

    To me oral should always be controlled by the giver, so forcing them to go beyond their ability or comfort level is, at best, taking advantage, and at wort, abusive. I don’t like it at all.

  14. Reality Check Says:

    Oh, and to ‘Greg’ above who said “she’ll get over it”, thus proving that he doesn’t give a damn about his partner, as long as he gets what he wants, can I just say that you are a complete fucking douche.

  15. iloveit Says:

    I love giving head and gagging. I don’t do it for show but it happens during a good deep throat from time to time. Most men love it and I had one guy tell me that I didn’t have to do it (as if I don’t enjoy the feeling) which was rather annoying. I have thrown up once which was embarrassing and was not sexy at all….my partner was very proud and turned on by it….so I guess everyone is different! This women loves oral and doesn’t mind chocking…it happens :-)

  16. ShirleeSez Says:

    My partner and I have come to a mutual decision. You want a PBJ (platonic blow job), do not touch me. I will control the job so I can control the deep-throating and lack of gagging. You just holler out if you’re getting close so I’m prepared for the swallow. He is to just relax and enjoy the sensation.

  17. jack Says:

    I just met this lady who loves to gag this is very new to me we had talked about out likes and dislikes and see eye to eye on almost everything . we have not reached her actualy deep throating me yet . but once we were going at it and she had a toy in the mix then just near completion for both of us . she deep throated her toy several times I heard her gag and seen her eyes water up.. and she had a huge orgasm.. like I said we were both near completion who was I to stop when she did this ? im still not sure how I feel about it . maybe ill form a better opinion when she deep throats me and gags on my man hood …

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