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Wise Guys: Do Men Prefer Watching Porn Solo or with a Partner?

Tue, Jan 10, 2012

Advice, Wise Guys

photo via flickr

Advice from three of EMandLO.com’s guy friends. This week they answer the following: “Given a choice, would most guys like to watch porn with a partner? Or would they prefer to keep it as a purely solo activity?” To ask the guys your own question, click here.

Straight Married Guy (David Jacobs): You’re talking to someone whose wife gets embarrassed when actors make out in regular old Hollywood fare, so I’ll admit I haven’t pushed the mutual porn-watching angle much. This is not to say she’s a total prude — she’s just not a fan of excessive PDA. Granted, there doesn’t seem to be much genuine affection evident in your average porno, though certainly plenty of over-the-top affected passion. Actually, that being the case, she might get a kick out of some brief triple-X viewing here and there, since she loves ridiculous, badly acted B-movies, especially the made-for-TV variety. But it would just be for laughs — which is obviously not why I’d want to rope her into the whole thing.¬†No, the reason you try to get your partner to watch porn with you is to make her horny, or better yet to make her realize that a threesome with a super-hot, slutty nurse is really all she wants for Valentine’s Day. Otherwise you’re better off saving that kind of thing for the occasional date with yourself, and instead spending quality time with your partner either watching an intentionally funny movie or getting it on to the less polarizing accompaniment of Marvin Gaye or 30 Rock.

Gay Married Guy (Jon Ross):¬†Personally, I’ve tried watching porn with my husband, and overall it’s been a somewhat¬†unsatisfying experience. Of course, each man is different. But for me, porn is a very personal “me time” activity. I find that most guys are very picky about porn, and they each have their own particular way that they like to watch it. The glut of internet porn available to us has also made us very greedy. We all have our own particular way we want to watch it — sometimes we want to see some oral action, and then flip to some penetration, then back to oral. Or we want to have ten videos up on our computer at the same time, and flip back and forth between scenes. Maybe we want to watch a longer, slow-burning clip. Or perhaps we just want to watch that¬†one moment¬†that is just¬†so hot -- over and over again. It all depends on our mood. When my husband comes in and messes with the¬†control¬†I’m used to having, I begin to get antsy. But every guy has a different style. Maybe your man’s style is to watch it together. Just ask. If you want to watch it with him and it gets you in the mood, I guarantee he will be willing to work something out.

Straight Single Guy (Adam):¬†Hmmm… interesting question… gimme a sec…. okay, back (sorry, had to hit pause on the good ol’ Blu-Ray). ¬†Now to your question: I don’t think there’s a black and white answer to this one because it all depends on mood and purpose. Feeling inspired and all alone? ¬†If so, then maybe it’s time for a little solo viewing. ¬†Feeling frisky and your S.O. is around (and she’s feeling frisky too)? ¬†Why not make it a tandem activity? ¬†All that said though, my suspicion is that most guys would probably prefer to watch porn by themselves. ¬†There can be a certain discomfort about watching your favorite dirty movies with someone else because you’re not sure what the other person is ultimately going to think about the things that turn you on. ¬†It’s kind of like watching the Lord of the Rings movies with someone whose never seen them before: You hope the other person likes them, but more importantly, you hope they still like you afterward. ¬†(Plus, what are they going to think of all that hobbit-on-hobbit love at the end?! Which, come to think of it, and depending on genre, can be a question equally applicable to porn.)

Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors. This week’s Straight Married Guy is David Jacobs, a NYC-based photographer; our Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross, who works for a network news program and lives in Brooklyn with his husband and two dogs; and our Straight Single Guy is Adam, a lawyer and native Floridian in his early thirties. To ask the guys your own question, click here.

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One Response to “Wise Guys: Do Men Prefer Watching Porn Solo or with a Partner?”

  1. sean Says:

    Always better if with a partner, but thats not to say its no good to try alone. But always prefer a little assistance if you know what I mean!


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