Consider this advice on what NOT to say on a first (or second or third or fourth or fifth…) date:
- You remind me of my ex.
- I can’t stay out too late tonight — the season finale of “The Bachelorette” is on.
- Cutco knives are so awesome.
- I only cry during rom coms…and right after sex.
- I should warn you, my penis is unusually large.
- Contraception is not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.
- I can’t wait to show you my teddy bear collection.
- Just a sec, I have to text back my mom.
- The last novel I read? That one by Snooki.
- It’s chilly, I should have worn my cape.
April 11th, 2012 at 8:59 pm
Ha! I had a job selling Cutco knives for about three days right after high school.
April 11th, 2012 at 10:29 pm
What’s wrong with teddy bears? I’m a perfectly straight male who happens to like them.
April 11th, 2012 at 11:39 pm
Lmao! I sold Cutco too! I still have two of the knives and the scissors.
Those knives are pretty awesome
April 12th, 2012 at 8:17 am
I too sold Cutco knives for 3 days in high school. Remember the rope-cutting demonstration? My friend’s dad sliced off a small bit of my finger tip during that part. My finger print now has a distinctive smooth area.
April 12th, 2012 at 10:31 am
Hold on, we’re all assuming this is a date that’s going well! These are some of my go-to lines to bail!
April 12th, 2012 at 11:00 am
^ Ha!
April 12th, 2012 at 1:13 pm
I just want to tell you up front that I have herpes. Talk about a buzz kill!
April 12th, 2012 at 4:14 pm
“Let’s get matching tattoos” Yeah, she said it. I considered it for a second. :p
April 12th, 2012 at 5:55 pm
Hey, what’s wrong with capes? They’re good enough for super heroes, they’re good enough for me. *grin*
May 21st, 2012 at 9:53 pm
Capes are cool. Just saying.
May 26th, 2012 at 4:02 pm
Not gonna lie, I told my guy that I sold Cutco up front, except mine was to brag- sold over $30,000 in 4 months. Those knives ARE awesome!