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Wise Guys: When Is a Good Time to Meet the Parents?

Tue, Nov 6, 2012

Advice, Wise Guys

Advice from three of EMandLO.com‚Äôs¬†guy friends. This week they answer the following:¬†‚ÄúWhen is a good time to meet the parents and when is too soon?‚Ä̬†To ask the guys your own question,¬†click here.

anonymous_suitStraight Single Guy (Max):¬†The only thing that I know is that meeting the parents has got to be planned and discussed ahead of time. The only time that I’ve ever felt it was “too soon” was when I didn’t know that I was about to meet the parents. God, that was an awkward walk of shame. Otherwise, I think that it’s a nice thing to get out of the way. What if you date someone for months and months only to find that your parents don’t like them? That would be a bummer. It’s best to introduce everyone and start working on forming a solid relationship, even if it has to be an awkward one.

wiseguy_benStraight Married Guy (Ben):¬†Five months. Anytime before that is too soon, even if they’re just breezing in and out of town. And if you haven’t met them by the one-year-mark, the relationship really isn’t going anywhere.

 

Gay Single Guy¬†(Justin Huang):¬†You should definitely meet the parents before you move in together, just out of respect. Other than that, it’s really case-by-case. Just don’t overthink it. Some parents are really chill and you’ll just be another trick to them. Of course, if he or she makes a big deal out of it and makes you rent a tux, maybe it’s a good time to reconfirm that both of you are on the same page in your relationship.

Our ‚Äúwise guys‚ÄĚ are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Ben, a writer and artist living in Los Angeles who runs AdultParlorGames.com; our Gay Guy is Justin Huang, an LA-based freelance film editor, producer, certified personal trainer and the voice of IAmYellowPeril.com; and our Single Straight Guy, Max, is a recent college grad in New York City. To ask the guys your own question, click here.

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One Response to “Wise Guys: When Is a Good Time to Meet the Parents?”

  1. figleaf Says:

    Interesting question. For at least your first couple of partners chances are pretty good you met the parents before you actually became partners.

    A little later, especially if you go away to college, it’s probably a bigger deal to you and your partner than it is to your parents because chances are good it involves one of you being away from the parents over a holiday — sometimes for the first time.

    Speaking as a parent (of teenagers, yikes!) I just want everyone to keep in mind that it’s almost always going to be a bigger deal for you than it is for your folks. First because we remember meeting our own partner’s parents, and second because chances are very good that the new partner won’t be radically different (in terms of “being good for you”) than your previous ones. And as for their opinion on whether your partners are good for you or not? Each parent’s opinion counts as one vote just like anyone else’s. But only that one vote.

    figleaf


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