The following is an excerpt from the “S”section of our new A-Z book, 150 Shades of Play: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink. Every bolded word below indicates an entry in our encyclopedia of sorts. The book is on sale now!
Spanking is hand-to-tush contact, which many consider more intimate and less scary than any other type of flagellation. Itâ€™s Christian Greyâ€™s calling card. Spanking is definitely safer for newbies, since you have much more control over (and better aim with) your own hand. Spanking can be a seasoning (a few spanks during a particularly passionate bout of intercourse to add some kinky flavor), an appetizer (spanking as foreplay before more orgasm-focused activities, like the first vaginal balls scene in Fifty Shades of Grey), or it can be a meal in and of itself (a session in which the spanking is the goal — the main course, if you will — that takes half an hour to serve and enjoy).
If youâ€™re hungry for more than just a sprinkle of seasoning, then follow the rules of any first-time flagellation: Have the spankee lie across your lap, kneel on a bed, stretch out stomach-down, or bend over something they can put their full weight on for comfort; start slowly and build up intensity gradually with your bottomâ€™s permission, varying your pressure and strokes; and contain your spanking to the lower, fleshier halves of each cheek and the backs of the upper thighs (even if youâ€™re just having a spanking snack during sex, this area should be your target) — avoid the lower back, tailbone, and back of the knees at all costs.
Specific considerations for spanking include the following:
- Remove all bracelets and rings.
- Start with a butt massage.
- Follow each blow with a short massage, too, to spread out the pain and keep things nice â€˜nâ€™ warm (at least during your first few sessions together).
- A woman might like particular attention paid at the intersection of ass crack and crease, with the vibrations reverberating throughout the vulva, but definitely steer clear of the guyâ€™s family jewels.
- Remember that, because of your close proximity to your partner, spanking is especially great for pleasantly diddling their lemonade area while whacking the steps of their fudge factory â€˜round the corner.
A.k.a. fanny dusting.Â See also floggers, paddles, slappers, and arnica cream.
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