Reader K said the following in response to the post, “Your Call: My Husband Isn’t Interested in Sex with Me.”
I am dealing with some of the same issues. My husband hardly ever wants to have sex. He used to blame it on my weight gain, the house is messy, heâ€™s too tired . . . Finally he admitted that he has trouble getting it up. Heâ€™s in his mid 50s, a long-time smoker, and diabetic. I clicked on this page because I was hoping someone had some ideas. Instead I feel that I have advice:
- There are likely deeper issues there. See if you can get some alone time to tell him how much you love him and let him know you want to know whatâ€™s REALLY going on.
- Get him to a doctor if you can. Diabetes, high blood pressure, low testosterone, high stress, obesity, and many other conditions may make it difficult or impossible for him to perform.
- Be patient. Sometimes I think of how I would handle things if my husband was paralyzed or otherwise truly unable to have sex. I would still stick with him because I love him.
I hope some of this is helpful. I have gotten to the point where Iâ€™ve been turned down for sex so many times that itâ€™s hard to try anymore, but I wonâ€™t give up. I love him too much to allow lack of sex to ruin a good thing.