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We Joined the Mile-High Club…And Got Caught

Fri, Jul 26, 2013

Advice, Books, How To, Pop Culture

Earlier this week we published an excerpt from Tracey Cox’s awesome new book, Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True, which is available now on Amazon for your Kindle. The excerpt explains how and why fantasizing can improve your sex life. Today, in a second excerpt from the book, a British woman named Madison (you’ll notice some fun U.K. slang!) who is 24 and works in sales, shares her ultimate fantasy… and what happened when she tried to make it come true!

THE FANTASY

I’m traveling with a work colleague who I have always lusted after. We’re both single and we travel together a lot for business. We get on really well but I’ve never been able to tell if he fancies me or just likes me as a friend. The night before our flight, we were up late schmoozing clients, so we’re both a bit hungover and in silly moods. He looks even hotter than usual because he hasn’t shaved and I love the stubble – his jaw line is square and the stubble just accentuates it. He’s got long, dark eyelashes and gorgeous blue eyes, and every time we work together half of me works while the other fantasizes about the two of us getting it on. We both line up to board the plane and are delighted to find we’ve been bumped up from Business to First-Class. It’s an eight-hour flight and we’re both looking forward to having a glass of wine and then passing out on the flat beds. We settle in, chat a bit, then both start watching movies while enjoying our wine.

In First-Class, there are about a zillion films to choose from and I end up watching an old movie: 8 Mile starring Eminem and Brittany Murphy. There’s an incredibly hot sex scene in it that’s explicit and looks really real, like they’re really having sex, not just acting for the cameras. The combination of the hangover (I’m always up for sex the day after drinking), the wine, the sexy luxury of being in First and my hot colleague sitting next to me, makes me feel really turned on. I surreptitiously play the same sex scene over and over, rewinding and replaying. My colleague is blissfully unaware of my high state of excitement because I’ve angled the screen so he can’t see what I’m watching. (Well, that’s what I think, anyway!) Eventually, I get to the point where I’m desperate for release and it just so happens, I have a small bullet vibrator in my hand luggage. I discreetly get it out of my bag, pocket it and get up out of my seat, smiling at my friend and pointing to the loo to explain where I’m going. He looks at me intently and we lock eyes. I flush. For a moment, it feels like he’s reading my mind and knows exactly what I’m going to the loo to do . . .

As I move through the cabin, I see nearly all the passengers are asleep. Brilliant. I won’t have to rush and won’t be disturbed. The flight attendants are eating their meals and have the curtain pulled back. But I’ve barely had time to pull up my skirt and turn the vibe on, when there’s a discreet knock at the door. What the fuck? Annoyed, I say loudly ‘Someone’s in here’ and am astonished when I hear my work mate say, ‘I know. Let me in.’

My stomach flips and I’m genuinely shocked. What does he want? Is something wrong? I don’t dare hope for what seems obvious: he wants to join in! I get myself together and pocket the vibe. When I open the door he’s standing there with a huge naughty grin on his face. He looks directly into my eyes and says ‘I know what you’re up to. I could see what you were watching. Let me in.’

I’m tipsy enough not to be embarrassed and all those years of pent-up lust render me incapable of resisting him. I reach out with my arm, grab him around the neck and pull him inside. We’re kissing before I’ve even locked the door behind us and it feels glorious. We’re biting each other’s lips and there’s lots of tongue. He starts moving his tongue inside my mouth suggestively, mimicking oral sex, so I push his head down and he immediately moves to my breasts and pulls open my top, sucking and squeezing my nipples. There’s not much room so I end up sitting on the closed loo seat with my skirt hiked up and him kneeling on the floor between my legs. He takes my panties off and then his deliciously slippery tongue is teasing me and I come in about two minutes. He pulls back and looks at me – his face is wet from licking me and he looks so aroused, it makes me crazy. I tell him to stand up then I unzip him and take his lovely erect penis into my mouth. It’s big and thick and exactly as I’d imagined. I’m great at giving head – all of my boyfriends have told me – so he doesn’t last very long either.

The whole thing only takes about five minutes, so when he comes out of the loo, the coast is clear. I wait a few minutes then come out myself. There’s only one guy awake in the cabin and he either didn’t notice both of us missing or didn’t care. Back at our seats, my sexy colleague leans over and gives me a slow, sexy kiss and says ‘I’ve wanted to do that for years.’

THE DECISION

My boyfriend of two months and I went on our first dirty weekend and were at that ‘can’t keep our hands off each other’ stage. We arrived at the airport a bit early so went to a bar to have some celebratory champagne. Then the flight was delayed, so we had another glass and by the time we got on the flight, we were pretty tipsy. The plane was full up the front and empty down the back so once we’d taken off, we headed down the back for some privacy. The staff could see we were a bit away with the fairies but we were so obviously smitten with each other, I think they found it quite sweet. They more than happily gave us more alcohol, which made us even soppier and then more and more daring. We were snogging like mad and started getting quite het up: my boyfriend started fondling my breasts when the flight attendants were up the front of the plane serving drinks, and safe to say we were both up for anything.

THE REALITY

My boyfriend went to the loo, which was literally right next to our seats, and after he’d had a pee he opened the door and said ‘Quick, come inside here with me.’ On the spur of the moment I went to join him, more as a bit of a laugh. It wasn’t pre-meditated, but becoming a member of the ‘mile high club’ was a favourite fantasy of mine. He pulled me inside and locked the door and we were giggling away but then we started kissing and the mood changed. I unzipped him, knelt down and took him in my mouth, which wasn’t quite as sexy as it sounds because there’s no space in there and it’s bright as hell with the automatic lighting. It’s not exactly romantic or erotic and it smelt a bit! So I’ve got my mouth wrapped around his penis but am eyeballing the flush lever and tissue dispenser, and he was looking at a plastic door. It was a turn-on but not as hot as everyone makes out!

His penis was as hard as rock though so I thought, Sod it, we might as well go for it. We swapped positions (easier said than done in a tiny space), so he had his back to the door and I turned around so my bum faced him, held onto the toilet seat for balance, lifted up my skirt and pulled my knickers to the side so he could slip inside. That felt amazing and clearly it did for my boyfriend as well because he was groaning way too loud. I turned around to tell him to shhhh but he put his fingers in my mouth and made me suck them and we fucked for a few minutes, hard and intensely, both loving every second.

But then we heard voices outside the door. It was the flight attendants chatting away – our seats and the loo were right next to their station. He pulled out and we got ourselves together ready to exit (neither of us had orgasmed but I don’t think we really expected to – we figured it would be more of a tease than anything else) and waited for them to get whatever they’d come back for and then disappear back to the front of the plane. Except they didn’t disappear and it soon became obvious they weren’t going to because they were getting the trolley ready to serve the meal. Shit! We both stood there, locked inside the loo, our hands clapped over our mouths to stop us laughing, looking at each other with wide eyes because the realization we probably weren’t going to get away with it was starting to hit.

After a few minutes, we heard two other voices that weren’t the flight attendants. A woman said ‘Have you knocked on the door? Maybe there’s no-one in there.’ We froze. Next thing, there’s a knock and the flight attendant says ‘Is anyone in there?’ We both looked at each other, willing the other to deal with the situation. I felt horribly drunk and didn’t trust myself to speak because I knew I’d sound slurry. We hadn’t thought this through at all so it wasn’t like we had a back-up plan. My boyfriend finally said ‘Just a moment!’ I had a brain wave and said ‘Say you came in here with me because I felt sick.’ We both thought that was amazingly inventive but apparently that’s the standard excuse every couple gives when caught.

Unlocking that door was the worst. My boyfriend opened it to see a queue of about three or four people, standing there with arms folded and looking really fed up. Our sense of time was obviously skewed from all the drink and I got the horrible feeling we’d been in there for a lot longer than we thought we had.

They looked mighty pissed off when they saw my boyfriend and glared at him. Then they clocked that he wasn’t in there alone. ‘My girlfriend isn’t feeling well,’ he said, but absolutely no-one was buying it. The flight attendants kept stacking the trolley, pretending nothing untoward was happening but they looked highly amused. They’d obviously seen it all before! The woman at the front of the queue was stroppy and furious. ‘She’s drunk, not sick,’ she said and gave us a withering look as we slunk out of the loo and slid back into our seats. That was the other problem: we then had to sit there while the other three people waiting for the loo smirked and giggled and whispered to each other because our seats were right where they were standing!

Even worse, they all went back to their seats and spread the word because suddenly everyone was craning their necks and turning around to look at us. It was mortifying! When the flight finally landed, we waited until everyone else got off the plane before leaving. The flight stewardess said ‘That’ll teach you’ when she saw us hiding in our seats but at least she laughed. When we got off we hid until most of the people had got their luggage, then sheepishly went to get ours.

Despite the embarrassment, it was worth it. We laughed about it the whole weekend and although the actual sex was rubbish and we didn’t even orgasm, the thought that you’re having sex and there’s only a flimsy door separating you from the other passengers is undeniably erotic.

Dare: What Happens When Fantasies Come True by Tracey Cox is on sale now! And her toys are available at LoveHoney.

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