2 weeks ago
6 Rules for Outdoor Sex (Video)

Now that the weather’s turning warmer, many people are overcome by two urges: to get outside and to get it on — two great tastes that taste great together! And so the season of outdoor sex has begun — is there anything more all-American worth celebrating this July 4th? But it’s not all fun and games like naked Slip n’ Slide — there are some practicalities to consider before you answer the call of the wild:

1. Be discreet.

Outdoor sex, a subset of public sex, by definition includes the perpetual potential danger of being discovered — that’s part of its thrill. But most people don’t want to see you doing it. Therefore, you must calculate the risks and unless the chances of being discovered are next to nil, don’t do it.

2. Avoid nudity in public places.

Unless you’re at a nude beach, at college or in Europe. Wear a skirt or dress or elastic-band pants and forgo the underwear. Your partner will have easier access to some of your fun bits, while being able to maintain a modicum of discretion. Plus, you can make a faster getaway if you’re not caught with tight jeans around your ankles!

3. Bring a blanket.

…to lay down over dirt, rough ground, sand or itchy grass. Poison ivy on your butt is no picnic.

4. Use sunscreen.

Protect any flesh that doesn’t usually see the sun (e.g. your pasty bum), making sure not to get any in or around your very private parts.

5. Use condoms.

If intercourse (vaginal or anal) is on the agenda, use a condom (even if you two don’t usually) – it’ll keep everything tidier, especially when there’s no running water near by.

6. Pack out what you pack in.

You know, like all good campers! Don’t leave any unsightly evidence of your tryst for innocent hikers or beachcombers to stumble upon.

Pro Tip: If it’s a chilly night, hop in a sleeping bag (or two zipped together) in the missionary position — the close quarters might increase your body contact ratio, which many women find helpful in their orgasm endeavors.

This post has been updated.

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1 Comment on "6 Rules for Outdoor Sex (Video)"

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Hiker

Also: ALWAYS HAVE WATER. Seriously. Very important. Outdoor sex interrupted by dehydration is the worst thing ever, and actually likely if you’ve had to hike to the location in question.

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