by Rebecca Jane Stokes for YourTango
So you’re in a relationship. You’ve met the guy or gal of your choice, and now you’re together … but now what?
We take it as a given that once we’ve found the person we want to be with that everything will just fall into place. That’s not always the case.
Even the happiest couples in a relationship can fall victim to these six insanely common relationship problems, that can easily turn your happiness into a giant mess of relationship toxicity.
1. Housework Inequity
Housework can go from irksome to major woes. Women feel pressure to be responsible for keeping the house clean AND to work AND to take care of themselves. If a man forgets to clean up, it’s just because he’s forgotten, but women don’t see it that way. We see it as unspoken statement: I don’t respect you.
2. Co-dependency
Of course you rely on your partner for a lot, but relying on them too much can deaden your sex life. It’s so important to build relationships outside of the one you have with your partner, and to foster your own hobbies. No one person can be everything for someone else.
3. Lax Self-Care
In the immortal words of RuPaul: If you can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love someone else? Ru speaks truths. In order to be healthy and present in a relationship with another person, you’ve got to known how to love yourself, and how to take care of yourself. If you don’t, you guys are doomed.
4. Limited Personal Space
When you first meet your partner you can’t get enough of each other. You have to spend every single second together. But the longer you guys are together the more important spending time on your own becomes. Personal time is crucial to restoring you and keeping you present in your relationship.
5. No mystery
If you’re with someone long enough you take it as a given that you know every little thing about them. That’s a relationship killer. View your partner as someone who still has the possibility to surprise you. People are vast, y’all. They contain multitudes.
6. Bad Fighting Habits
You get used to fighting in a relationship. It’s par for the course. You know now that a fight doesn’t mean the relationship is over. But that doesn’t mean you should dismiss each one. Remember when you fight that the things you say you can’t take back. When it’s over, never forget to apologize and makeup.
This article was originally published on YourTango: 5 Toxic Things Couples Ignore That Actually RUIN Relationships
More content from YourTango:
