THE WINNER: Kids at last asleep My wife went out to Costco A break from laundry — Carol R. Congratulations to Carol, who will soon be the proud owner of a luxury Ina Wave pleasure object from LELO.com (worth $200). With so many fantastic entries to choose from, it was a tough call to make, […]
***THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED*** May is Masturbation Month! Enter our Haiku Contest and you could win an Ina Wave from LELO.com, the revolutionary vibrator with the come-hither gesture for optimum G-spot stimulation worth $200! (One runner-up will receive a bottle of LELO Personal Moisturizer to help make months like May go more smoothly, if […]
A big THANK YOU to everyone who entered our Tux-themed haiku contest! We got so many great entries that judging was tough…but not impossible. Unfortunately, we can’t include every single entry below, but some are just too good not to share! So along with the winners, we’re posting the honorable mentions — or should we say, “honorable unmentionables”? The 1st Place Winner […]
THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED: SEE WHO WON HERE! We’re giving you the chance to win a great, romantic, sensual gift set worth almost $200 from LELO.com for Valentine’s Day! LELO just launched Tux, a sophisticated, elegant, and luxurious…wait for it…willy warmer! (Only LELO could combine humor and refinement so effectively.) In honor of the occasion, we’d like you to […]
aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th) These aren’t sex toys: Friends, neighbors, coworkers, pets. Stick with your own hand. taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th) Do not jump the fence. The grass under your feetsies Is fertile and green. gemini (May 21st-June 21st) The leaf told the tree, “I’ll fall off when I’m ready.” Don’t pull leaves off trees. […]
Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes — ignore our advice at your own peril. (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.) aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th) They say they’re single. Who are you to believe them? Truth eludes us all. taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th) If you […]
Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes — ignore our advice at your own peril. (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.) aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th) I eat an apple. Outside it’s red, inside brown. Next time, banana. taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th) […]
As of pub time, we have no idea who will win the Germany vs Argentina final today (our guess: Germany; our hope: Argentina), but we do know who’s the winner in our LELO sexy World Cup haiku contest! You guys proved that sex toys and the World Cup go together like Suarez and animal behavior […]
Did your male sports fan partner miss the memo about buying you a sex toy before the World Cup? Or did you yourself miss the memo and your partner is now wondering where her pleasure object is? Well, here’s your chance to win $200 to spend at LELO and make amends, no matter who wins […]
Thank you for your many, many entries into our LELO Oral Sex Haiku Contest! You guys sure do like oral (or oral sex simulators… or LELO pleasure objects of any kind). And thank you especially for heeding to our wishes to leave the explicit stuff on the cutting room floor. Instead, you used beautiful images […]
sponsored post *** THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED *** The deadline for our LELO Ora haiku contest is end of day Friday, January 31st — a deadline specially chosen so that we can get the winner’s toy out before V-Day! So here’s your last chance to wax lyrical about oral sex and win yourself or […]
photo by Simply Schmoopie Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes — ignore our advice at your own peril! (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.) This week, we present your horos in short poem form: aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th) Let’s get physical Sang Olivia Newton. […]
Thank you for all your inspired entries in our Self Love Haiku Contest. Rabbit imagery seemed to be a big theme, which makes sense considering the prize up for grabs is a Rabbit-style vibe (one that’s waterproof, body-safe, powerful and quiet). And there were a lot of hilarious haikus that tickled our funny bones (which […]
***THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED*** We guess we should really title this post “Top 10 Haikus About Self Love That Em and Lo Just Came Up With.” We figured it’s a Friday, so what better time to celebrate the wonders of onanism! In honor of this joyous occasion, we’d like to give away one INA 2 […]
We know the suspense has been killing you. But now all will be revealed. Behold, the winners of our Sex Toy Haiku Contest sponsored by Lelo! @fredofsnakes will be getting a luxury Oden couples ring with SenseMotion technology as the winner of a random drawing from all who Tweeted their sex toy haikus. The competition was tough for the Best Written […]
Who knew that hashtags weren’t forever searchable on Twitter? Did you know that? Um, we didn’t. Which means we can no longer find any of the sex toy haikus that you Tweeted for our Lelo contest since #EmAndLoHaikuContest is no longer searchable. So, if you Tweeted your sex toy haiku, please send us your Twitter […]
