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Dream Interpretation: My Straight Husband Received Gay Oral

November 13, 2013

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photo via flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

My husband, two nights in a row, has dreamed of oral sex. The first night was him getting a blow job from Tully on Australian Big Brother and the second night was him getting blow job from Ben from the same show!!! OMG! Am I insufficient?

Lauri:¬†My goodness, I hope not! Surely Hubby would let you know if your oral skills weren’t up to par. Don’t worry. These dreams are more about him than they are about you.

Oral sex in a dream is often about communication in real life… intimate conversation to be more precise. Since your husband was on the receiving end of the oral sex, it is likely that he was on the receiving end of this conversation in real life. ¬†The givers in these dreams are clues as to what this intimate conversation may have been about. The common thread is that they are both on Big Brother. So it may not be so much about these people but more about what Big Brother represents to your husband (dream interpretation is like the game connect the dots). Did husband feel on display recently? Was he under scrutiny? Was he worried about being scrutinized and evicted in some way, kicked out of something at work or in his family or social group?

Whatever the case, it seems a good, honest and intimate conversation was had over the situation and that he has been… left satisfied!

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too!¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Dreamed My Crush Was Under Anesthesia

November 7, 2013

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photo via flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had a dream about a coworker that I have a crush on — we both work in the O.R. I am sure of two things: 1. He doesn’t know I like him, and 2. He is WAY out of my league.

I had a dream that he was on the table and under anesthesia. Everyone just walked out of the room and I was left standing there alone and very upset about his condition. His head was turned very far to the right, which made the intubation that much more obvious. I was crying and rubbing his neck, and saying over and over again, “You have to be ok. You can’t do this. You have to be ok.” Once I said, “You have to come back to me.” I actually woke up crying a little from this.

Lauri: As upsetting as this dream was for you, I believe it is trying to help you manage your emotions in regards to your co-worker. In the dream he is under anesthesia because in real life he is oblivious and not awake to the fact that you dig him. You are rubbing his neck/throat area in the dream for two reasons, I believe:

1. The neck/throat area is where the voice comes from. Have there been times where you really wanted to voice yourself to him?

2. Voicing your interest in him would really put both of your “necks” on the line as far as your job goes. I mean, you guys are working in an operating room… the absolute last place there should be any distraction whatsoever!¬†But you know this; your dream reflects this knowledge.

Finally, what you say to him in the dream is what you are really saying to yourself in regards to him (I always say, dreams are a conversation with the self): “You have to be okay. You can’t do this.” YOU have to be okay. YOU can’t let this attraction overpower you. YOU can’t do this, i.e. you can’t tell him how you feel and you can’t let it get the best of you.

And I believe when you say, “You have to come back to me,” you are really saying you have to bring your thoughts and focus back to yourself so you can continue to perform at your best while in the O.R. And this is where your sadness over his potential death comes in to play. Deep down, you know it just can’t be, and so, through this dream, you are expressing your sadness over this reality. I understand. You can’t help whom you are attracted to but you are a human and we humans have will power and self control, and through this dream, I believe you are drawing upon yours.

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too!¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Liked My Bi Dream, Does That Mean I’m Bi?

October 24, 2013

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had a dream last night where my best friend (a girl, like me) and I had sex…and I enjoyed it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Does that mean I am BI??????????????????

Lauri: No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  If you were bisexual, you would probably know it by now.  Everybody gets naughty dreams where they are with the same gender. And gay people get dreams where they are with the opposite sex. Dreams are not to be taken literally because they speak in a symbolic language.

In addition, sex dreams aren’t commenting on your sexuality, they are commenting on your psyche. ¬†Most often, sex dreams are really about the union of qualities, mindsets or opinions. If you look at it this way — psychologically rather than sexually — it makes sense that you would have had such a dream with your BFF.

The day before you must have really connected in some way, united emotionally and/or psychologically. In a nutshell, the two of you came together in your dream because you “came together” on some level in real life. ¬†Make sense??????????????????

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too!¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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My Fiance Bit Me Like a Vampire in His Sleep

October 20, 2013

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nosferatu_vampireimage by King Chimp, from “Nosferatu”

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I am big into pain while having sex, and I am also into vampires. My¬†fiance and I live together and he knows about the things I like. Well, one night while we were both sleeping he snuck up on me like vampire. Like he was lying next to me in bed and slowly¬†creeped on top of me. He then pushed my shoulders down holding me tight and bit my neck. I liked every second of this because I LOVE being dominated and controlled in the bedroom. What I don’t get is why he did this while he was sleeping. After about 10 seconds, he let go, turned around and went back to sleep.¬†He didn’t even remember doing it the next day! What does it mean? Am I just lucky or should I be worried?
Lauri: Aw, man.Too bad for you he didn‚Äôt continue!!While it is not unusual to talk in one‚Äôs sleep, it is more unusual to act out while asleep.So I have a few questions for you to pose to your boyfriend.Does he have a history of sleep walking?Sleep walkers in childhood often go through phases of it again as adults and it’s often triggered by stress.While he didn‚Äôt actually get up and walk, he did act out so if he did sleep walk as a child, keep an eye on him in case he actually makes it out of bed next time.Is he on any sleep aids such as Ambien?Ambien has been known to cause all kinds of parasomnias, which are abnormal and unnatural movements, behaviors, emotions and perceptions that occur while falling asleep, sleeping, between sleep stages, or arousal from sleep. One of the most reported parasomnias caused by Ambien is sleep sex!If he answered no to all of the above, then keep yourself aware of his sleep behavior.If he acts out again, start keeping track.It couldbe the beginnings of REM Behavior Disorder where people act out their violent dreams.It mostly affects men and, of the men affected, most are middle aged.It can be treated with muscle relaxers should that wind up being the case.But odds are it is nothing to worry about and should give you a great role playing game idea for the bedroom‚Ķ if you haven‚Äôt acted that out already.

Response from dreamer: This does seem right. He said that he was caught sleep walking once as a child, but hasn’t noticed or been told about it besides that.¬† We have had sex after “waking up” in the middle of the night, and he hasn’t ever remembered it the next day. I have told him about it, and he just is in amazement that it happened. He is not on any kind of sleeping medications.¬† He also grinds his teeth really bad while he sleeps. Is this a part of REM Behavioral Disorder? Thank you for taking the time and answering my questions! It eases my mind to know that him acting like a vampire in his sleep isn’t really anything to worry about.

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Banged My Boss!

October 4, 2013

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I only hangout with people I work with — mostly guys who are 8 or more years older than I am. I’ve never been uncomfortable with this, in fact I’ve had a few flings with two of them. But I had a dream that I had a serious romantic relationship with my boss who is middle-aged, but attractive. I haven’t thought of him in this way at all until I had this dream. In it, my parents encouraged a marriage between us that I wasn’t wanting at all yet he and my parents forced me to marry him. How could I have such a dream?

Lauri: Shagging the boss in your dreams can sure make it difficult to come into work the next day, huh? Remember, sex dreams are not necessarily about the person but rather about what he or she represents.

In the case of your boss it is most likely power, authority, management skills, decision making, etc. that you need to merge into your own life. Your parents are even encouraging marriage in this dream. In real life what have your parents been encouraging you to do? Take on more responsibility? Better management skills? Or maybe it’s your job in general that they are wanting to be long term for you?

You don’t want to do this in the dream so it must be connected to something in real life you aren’t to keen on… but that may in fact benefit you, regardless. Where in your life do you need to take on the role of boss?¬† Are you facing a tough decision?¬† Do you need to fire or get rid of a certain element, person or behavior in your life? ¬†Or perhaps you simply need to merge with your boss psychologically in order to deal with a client or project. Whatever the case, the message of this dream is that it’s time to take charge! Being decisive and authoritative would suit you well now.
Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: Abusive Ex-Boyfriend Is Still In My Dreams

September 26, 2013

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had a dream that my current boyfriend tried to attack me last night. I was involved in a previous relationship that was abusive and still have fears about it. I woke up crying and I scared my boyfriend to the point where he doesn’t wanna be bothered with me. I try to remember the dream, but something won’t really allow me to. Please help.

Lauri:¬†Unfortunately I hear about this sort of thing all too often, a woman who was in an abusive relationship continuing to have nightmares about it long after she got out. Sigh. Breaks my heart. It’s a traumatic thing to live in constant fear of being pummeled at a moment’s notice. It really wrecks your sense of self worth and your sense of security, and obliterates your peace of mind!

Even though you are out of the relationship, your psyche hasn’t calmed down and you still hold onto the fear and it is expressed through your dreams. Your dreams can’t move forward until you move forward, and that is going to take a little bit of work, mostly on your part — but it sure would be helpful if your current boyfriend gave you some support too. He doesn’t want to be bothered with you? What kind of bullshit is that? The biggest predictor of future behavior is past behavior. If this is how he reacts to your very understandable issue, I wouldn’t expect him to be terribly helpful to you in the future. Sheesh already!

Luckily, this is something you can make great strides in with or without Mr. Can’t-Be-Bothered. First of all, realize that you are giving yourself these dreams; they are a creation of your own subconscious, therefore you can change and even put a stop to them! Typically, writing down the dream and then re-writing the ending the way you would like it to play out can work wonders.

But since you aren’t able to remember the details of the dream, journaling at bedtime will work just as well. It is crucial you journal right before you turn out the light to go to sleep, because what is on your mind as you drift off will affect your dreams.

I would start by writing a letter to yourself, and in that letter you need to do a couple things. First, forgive yourself for being in the relationship as long as you were. A lot of women who have been in abusive relationships continue to figuratively beat themselves up for staying in the relationship way longer than they should have. That does not help. So write yourself a forgiveness letter.

Then, write yourself a love letter. Yes, a love letter. If that seems crazy and you can’t imagine doing it, just pick three things you like about yourself: one thing you like about your physical appearance, one thing you like about your personality, and one thing you’ve done that you’re kinda proud of. Then expand a little bit on these three things. This will help you to build yourself back up after your ex has torn you down. This will also help you let go of unnecessary emotional baggage such as contempt for yourself. Do this every night for a while. When you make it a habit of going to bed feeling good about yourself, your dreams can’t help but follow the pattern!

In addition, it wouldn’t hurt to take some martial arts or a self-defense class. May as well build up your physical strength while you are building back up your inner strength. Be consistent with the journaling, make yourself physically stronger, and you’ll be surprised what a powerful force you’ll become in your own life… and your dreams will become pretty freaking cool as well! Keep us posted, will you?

 
Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: My Ex and My Current Boyfriend Are Interchangeable

September 19, 2013

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photo via Flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had a dream where my current boyfriend of six months, whom I just moved in with a few months ago, and my ex boyfriend (we were together and lived together for three years) interchangeably play the same role in my dream. One second in my dream it’s my current boyfriend, the next he is my ex. In the dream I am being rejected not in a harsh way but I am not wanted in my new home and my boyfriend has another non-sexual heterosexual male friend over. I am there to collect my belongings. I feel a sense of apprehension and a small amount of pain. I have been thinking of my ex but I am content in my current relationship. This has just left me a tad bit confused and curious as to how I am really feeling about my life right now. Seeing as though I never remember any of my dreams, this one definitely seems to have some significance.

Lauri:¬†Indeed this dream has quite a bit of significance and it seems to be showing you that you haven’t fully let go of your ex, or at least fully let go of any resentment, anger, and feelings of victimhood that the relationship may have caused.

According to your dream, by not fully letting go, you are essentially allowing your ex to reside with you and your current boyfriend. He is renting out space in your head! That ex must have really done a number on you. It’s very common when someone goes through a horrible break up to bring the pain into their next relationship, which is totally unfair to the new love interest. Be honest with yourself; is this what you are doing?

You should also ask yourself if perhaps your current boyfriend is cut from the same cloth as your ex. Do you keep falling for the same personality type? Is your current boyfriend starting to exhibit similarities in behavior and the way he treats you as your ex did? If so, your dream may be warning you that you are pretty much dating the same person. This is up to you to decipher. If your current boyfriend is becoming eerily similar to the ex then you need to realize that you don’t need to learn that lesson a second time and get out.

If your current boyfriend is nothing like your ex, then your dream is showing you that you MUST let go of the resentment because there is not enough room in your life, or your home, for both your boyfriend and your anger. Three’s a crowd, dahling.

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: My Boyfriend Said No to a Threeway

September 12, 2013

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had a dream last night that me and my boyfriend were having sex in a hotel room, and women kept on coming in and trying to get involved to have an FFM. I told my boyfriend that I didn’t mind if he really wanted to, but he kept on sending them away regardless of this, and he was even more annoyed when they tried to kiss me, etc. I don’t know why I had this dream and I’m really struggling to work out its meaning!

Lauri: Has this been a topic of discussion lately between the two of you? If so, your dream may be telling you that, deep down, you know this would not be a good idea for you two.

If you haven’t been discussing this option, and this dream seems to be coming from left field, I think I can help! First of all, the setting of the dream tells us that it is connected to a current issue in your life, or in your relationship, that is temporary, because we only stay in hotels for a temporary amount of time.

The way all these women kept coming in and trying to get involved tells us that there may be outside influences that are beginning to affect your relationship. What’s been going on lately that feels like an intrusion? Has someone been nosy? Or is there some sort of recent development that you are okay with but that your boyfriend is not?

The kissing makes me think this may have to do with either a conversation he does not want to have, or perhaps discussions you have been engaging in with others that he feels are wrong. What this boils down to is that your dream seems to be trying to show you that there is something you are okay with in real life that he is not and, once you figure out what it is, it may be best to move on from it rather than pushing the issue.

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: My Partner Sterilized Equipment to Kill Me

August 29, 2013

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I just had this awful dream that my partner was trying to kill me. It was a little odd at times as he was actually married to someone else in the dream, but I lived with him, and they both decided they were going to kill me. I kept trying to get upstairs to get my daughter to leave, but he was upstairs making everything sterile, all the instruments, it was horrid! I finally got my daughter in the car, then his wife — a random women in the dream — came chasing after me, hanging onto the car. It was so realistic I can smell bleach!

Lauri:  Dreaming that someone is trying to knock you off is fairly common. However, I really like the added element of the sterilizing bleach. Nice touch!

So, let’s figure this out. Odds are, your mate is not a homicidal maniac, so don’t worry. But he probably does want to “kill off” something about you or something in your life. Do you have a behavior or a habit he wants you to stop? Does he want you to lose weight? Is there anything going on in your life that he thinks needs to end? Or does he want to kill off who you are now and make you someone else… like his wife?

The bleach, and the fact that he is married in the dream, are both clues. The wife could mean that he is committed to this change that he wants to take place. The bleach might mean he wants to, or he wants you to “come clean” about something. Or perhaps he wants a fresh clean start in some way.

Whatever this change is, it is something you are resisting, which is why the dream was so horrid. It seems you don’t see it as a change but rather a death sentence! Might be a good time to discuss this with your mate, because he may be putting the pressure on a bit too much!

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: My Doctor Has a Penis AND a Vagina

August 23, 2013

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photo via Flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I work at a hospital as a professional vampire. lol The other night I had a dream about a woman doctor — no one I knew or recognized. She and I were dating and she didn’t care who knew or saw. She was very hands on in the hospital with me. I’m pretty sure we did “stuff” because I knew she had a vagina and a penis. What could this mean?

Lauri:  Your dream reminds me of one I had just the other night where I was a unicorn and I was dating Kelly Clarkson! But enough about me.

Dating is an interesting dream element and it can usually be connected to “courting an idea” in waking life. Are you courting the idea of becoming a doctor? If not, then this doctor represents something else you desire or are interested in trying out. Doctors are healers and to the dreaming mind they represent our own ability to make a waking life situation better. Is there an issue, a behavior or a relationship you are trying to heal?

The fact that she happened to be an hermaphrodite is another clue as to what this dream is really about. Remember, the doctor represents some part of you and her sporting both genitalia is a sign that, whether you desire to be a doctor someday or wish to heal some waking life situation, it’s going to take your male assertive energy and your female nurturing energy to do so.

And if you happen to sprout a magical horn in your next dream, we’ll need to talk!

Dreamer responds: Thanks for letting me have some insight on my dream. I was thinking that because¬†I’m kinda struggling with whether I like men or women or both, that is why she had both parts to her…? ¬†I agree about the part where you said it’s going to take your male assertive energy and your female nurturing energy to do so. I have been kinda telling my self I don’t want a relationship and acting like a guy when it comes to my relationships but in reality I do want one and that’s when the girl part comes into play. I do look up to doctors and really admire them but I don’t want to be one. Thanks so much for your help. I’m sure I will have plenty more weird dreams for you in the future.

Want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning? Lauri’s latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, will give you the tools you need to become a Dream Expert too! Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

 

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