Comment of the Week
Confessions
How to “Open Up” to Your Wife

Enjoyment of and fascination with one’s own butthole can get a bad rap. Freud deemed it one of his psychosexual “stages,” thereby guaranteeing negative societal judgment of it for about a full century now. And if you’re a straight dude? Forget it: all the narrow-minded sexist homophobes will call you gay and girly (as if those were […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week: Why Monogamy, Not Polygamy, Is the Norm

Reader Charles recently posted his theory as to why monogamy rules in the comments section of our post “Top 10 Reasons to Be — and Stay — Non-Monogamous.” Jump into the debate in the comments below: To be blunt, the most effective method of doing something dominates. As a central economic tenant states “A firm that […]

Confessions
Yay, Our First Trump-Inspired Hater!

Well, that didn’t take long. A sad Trump-supporter who projects his own self-hatred onto women went on a tear through the comments of the post “My Boyfriend Has a Small Penis…At Least It’s Small to Me.” Add this to the growing number of public expressions of hate now legitimized by Trump’s win. We’ll keep loathsome comments up as long […]

Comment of the Week
5 Ways to Avoid a Lifetime of Sad, Unsatisfying, Marital Sex

This comment by MEK in response to the post “My Husband Won’t Even Try to Give Me an Orgasm” is truly depressing. It’s a layered onion of bummer that makes us want to cry. This 21-year marriage has it all: Physical pain? Check. Miscommunication (or total lack of communication)? Check. Selfishness? Check. Resentment? Check. Bitterness? Check! […]

Confessions
Strap-Ons Are the Great Gender Equalizer

Discussions on pegging usually go in one of two directions: 1) Straight into the ugly past where men who enjoy anal play automatically means they’re either girly or gay [sic], OR 2) towards thoughtful discussions about the nuances of sex and the politics of gender. We obviously prefer to highlight the latter, so today we give you Jon’s recent […]

Confessions
The Great Strap-On Debate: Can a Woman Pressure Her Boyfriend to Get Pegged?

Every few months, a new debate pops up in the comments section of one of our most popular, evergreen posts — “Confession: I Want to Do My Boyfriend with a Strap-On” — written by an anonymous female contributor a few years ago. The standard fare is usually something tired about how “it’s gay and feminizing […]

Confessions
The Negative Power of Porn

Porn is a tricky thing. On the one hand, you can’t legislate people’s fantasies, especially when pornography may be the one sexual outlet they have.  As sexual liberator, educator or tension reliever, it can be a positive thing. But, it can also be a destructive thing: ruining relationships, setting up unrealistic expectations, perpetuating misogyny. Certainly some porn […]

Confessions
Talking to Your Daughters About Comfort and Consent

A friend just wrote us about her real world application of some of the advice Lo recently gave in “How to Prevent a Brock: 10 Practical Ways Parents Can Fight Rape Culture.” We couldn’t be more delighted! Raising conscientious kids with agency — especially girls — is possible in small, everyday ways like this: I wanted to share […]

Confessions
“DON’T Marry Someone for Their Potential”

Embed from Getty Images   Ciris had a particularly thoughtful response to our recent Your Call, “How Can He Get His Boyfriend to Fight Fair?” which broached the topic of trying to change a partner before you get married: A lot of the discussion seems to be “what I would do” or pseudo-psychoanalysis of the […]

Confessions
“Stop Relying on Your Dick to Please a Woman”

Apologies if we seem to be beating off a dead horse here: our last Comment of the Week was related to penis size, as well. But we can’t help it! This topic gets some of the best, most thoughtful and helpful responses from our amazingly enlightened readers. Behold,  RodR‘s smart reconceptualization of sex: I think […]

Confessions
“Below Average Penis Size Is NOT a Character Flaw”

Our post “My Boyfriend Has a Small Penis….At Least, It’s Small to Me” has the most comments of anything on EMandLO.com — almost 1000! And they just keep coming. Not all of them are helpful . . . or sane. So it’s nice when we get a tempered voice of reason. This week it was […]

Confessions
A Straight Man’s Take on Rape Culture

As usual, Johnny had something thoughtful to say. This past week it was about rape culture, thanks to the Stanford rape case in the news: You know… as a straight man you think “rape culture” is bullshit when you learn about it. You believe that a tiny percentage of men are rapists, and since they’re sociopaths, there’s no […]

Confessions
Like Rare White Antelopes, There ARE Men Who Don’t Watch Porn

Reader Corrinne recently responded to a comment by Madamoiselle L on the post “I’m Put Out About His Porn.” First L’s comment, followed by Corrinne’s:  Plehay said: “I’ve had very serious conversations with my boyfriend about why I am against the use of porn in lieu of human contact or communication, and the content that is […]

Confessions
The Most Disturbing Comment This Site Has Ever Received!

After over fifteen years in this business, we’ve seen and heard a lot. There was the couple asking about how they could get their golden retriever to consensually have sex with the wife while the husband watched. There was the morgue worker wondering if he could get STDs from the corpses. There was the “gentleman” Em […]

Comment of the Week
Should You Ask Out a Coworker? 6 Questions to Ask Yourself First

The following is a very thoughtful, thorough response to our post “Should He Hit on a Coworker?” from reader Barbara Arthur, a self-proclaimed “middle-aged female who used to work in career-oriented management positions but now chooses to work ‘just a regular job’ because she thinks management jobs suck (so thinks she can offer various perspectives).” […]

Comment of the Week
How Do I Deal with a Bisexual Girlfriend?

Our contributor Dr. AlanK had some sage advice for a young male reader whose girlfriend recently discovered that she is bisexual: You’re an early 20-something man and your girlfriend announces she’s bisexual. She has discovered that an important piece of her erotic makeup involves women. She will eventually connect with one. Hell, she probably should connect […]