TV
Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 7)

photo courtesy of ABC/Michael Fullana If you’re looking for an “intellectual connection” with a potential mate (like Sharleen), don’t go on “The Bachelor.” If your date makes you wish you were a little dumber (like JP makes Sharleen wish she were), then that is a clear sign this relationship should be kept squarely in the booty […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 6)

screenshot from ABC’s The Bachelor Everyone has their patented move (e.g. gently curling your date’s hair behind their ear). Just make sure your move doesn’t become an automatic, robotic gesture when a) you’ve run out of things to say, b) you’re not interested in the words coming out of your date’s mouth, and/or c) you’ve […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 5)

screenshot from ABC’s The Bachelor Your date being interested in hearing about your career is not “AMAZING!”, it does not make him an extraordinary human being with mystical qualities that make him the perfect guy for you. Asking you about your job and him actually listening to the answer should be the bare minimum for […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 4)

photo courtesy of ABC/Christopher Jue When your date confides in you about their terrible, deadbeat, alcoholic father who abandoned them, do NOT respond with, “Wow, that must have been so difficult for your father.” The appropriate response is, “Wow, that must have been so difficult for your YOU.” Don’t tell your date what you think […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 3)

photo courtesy of ABC/Rick Rowell Date location don’ts: cold and dirty city harbors (that you intend to swim in), sport stadium hot dog kitchens (that you intend to make out in), and bungee-jumping bridges next to busy 8-lane freeways. If you put just the tip in, it doesn’t count. We’re of course talking about putting just […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from The Bachelor: Juan Pablo, Ep 2

photo courtesy of ABC/Todd Wawrychuk Sensual massage and talk of the dearly departed do not mix. If someone on a date is pressuring you to do something that you don’t feel comfortable with, that goes against your values, and that you simply don’t want to do, then stand up for yourself and don’t do it! […]

How To
How to Get Over a Breakup…with Breaking Bad

In honor of the last episode ever of Breaking Bad (sniffle), we’ve reconnoitered our classic “How to Get Over a Breakup” article so Breaking Bad fans the world over can better deal with the loss of their loved one and try to fill the void left behind by the series ending.  Come here, Baby Blue, […]

Music
A Round-Up of Thoughtful Spankings Over the Miley Cyrus Spectacle

There’s been a LOT of talk this week over Miley Cyrus’s performance at last week’s VMAs. Here’s some of our favorite analysis: The 2013 VMAs Were Dominated by Miley’s Minstrel Show How Ratchet Culture Became The New Implied Bisexuality A 6-Minute Guide to the Prejudices of the Entertainment Industry What Miley Cyrus Did Was Disgusting […]

Music
The 10 Best and Worst Moments from the 2013 VMAs

photo via MTV.com THE WORST 1. Lady Gaga’s 26 costume changes into smaller and smaller outfits, ending in a Little Mermaid-inspired seashell/thong number. She’s just fucking with us at this point, right? 2. Miley Cyrus’s self-demotion to porny arm candy during her Blurred Lines “duet” with Robin Thicke (or was it the simulated rimming during […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelorette (The Finale)

Rebound sex, or even a rebound relationship is understandable after a bad breakup. But a rebound engagement? Probably not a good idea (especially if you can’t stop crying throughout the entire process). Having equally weird families (overly aggro brothers, overly handsy dads, etc) can really bond a couple, because each can understand and empathize with […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelorette (The Breakup Edition)

Ouch. We find Des to be a bit of a matzah bachelorette (flat and bland), but even we felt really, really bad for her last night. Getting dumped is hard, but it’s at least twenty-five times harder when it’s televised nationally. And what are the odds: you’ve got 25 potential suitors and you fall for […]

TV
Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelorette (The Men Tell All)

It’s hard to come up with five decent love lessons each week when the show isn’t that exciting this season. The bloopers reel wasn’t even that good! (And such small portions, too!) A sure a signifier of just how ho-hum this cast was. So don’t expect much enlightenment from “The Men Tell All.” Fingers crossed […]

TV
Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from the Bachelorette (S 9, Ep 8)

photo via ABC.com Dating don’ts: Showing up shirtless. Showing up in an animal mascot suit. Showing up in earnest. Don’t ever, EVER, let your Dad touch your date more than you’ve touched your date. Similarly: If you ever want to have sex again, do NOT, under any circumstances, get a nasal adjustment on national television. […]

TV
Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from The Bachelorette (S 9, Ep 7)

photo via ABC.com If someone asks you (Catherine) about the love of your life (Sean) and you respond “We’re best friends”…? Hello, red flag?! When you (Michael) are trying to make someone (Des) fall in love with you, don’t talk about all the negatives in your life: exes, health problems, daddy issues, freakin’ tombstones, etc. […]

TV
Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from The Bachelorette (S 9, Ep 6)

photo via ABC.com There are no imperfect places to fall in love in the entire resort world. None. Yes, yes, do take your date by the hand in the middle of some boring event, run out into a nearby secluded corridor, press them up against the wall and kiss them passionately, please, yes, do that. […]

TV
Top 5 Love Lessons Learned from Season 9 Ep 5 of The Bachelorette

photo via ABC.com If you (Bryden) are going to dump someone (Des), do NOT take great pains to do it publicly at an inconvenient time for the dumpee. Flying across an ocean to tell someone who you’re not even really dating that you don’t like them is a little “look at me! look at me!” […]