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Win a Mother’s Day Feel-Good Package from Tess & James!

April 24, 2014


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Tess & James is a new, small batch production company specializing in feel good products made from ingredients that are gentle on the skin, nice to your nose, and free of artificial colors, artificial flavors and preservatives. They believe that taking time to care for yourself enables you to give lovingly to others. So Tess & James has put together a Mother’s Day Feel Good Package especially for EMandLO.com readers — all you have to do by EOD EST Tuesday, April 29th, 2014 to enter to win the random drawing is:

This fabulous Em & Lo gift box will include:

  • Salty Bath Detox: An aromatherapy salt soak (in a 16 ounce jar) formulated to release toxins and extract impurities. Its carefully selected minerals and all-natural ingredients work together to balance the mind and body while soothing your skin.
  • Salty Bath Invigorate: A refreshing aromatherapy salt soak created to soothe tired and aching muscles. Its select minerals and all-natural ingredients will revitalize the senses and nurture your body while extracting impurities from the skin.
  • Tess & James Bath Porridge (16 ounces): This blend of organic oats, elderflowers and calendula mixed with other skin-nurturing botanics serves as a delightful alternative to harsh cleansers to help relieve the discomfort of dry, irritated skin. Simply mix one capful (or one ounce) of Bath Porridge directly into warm bath water, stir, add loved one and enjoy! Comes with a reusable bath sachet to keep your tub pristine.
  • Day Lip Shimmer: Roll out of bed and dress up your lips with Day, Tess & James’s nude lip tint and shimmer. This light, creamy, subtly sweet balm will nourish your lips and add a sparkle to your smile.
  • Night Lip Balm: This sexy black tube is loaded up with the most restorative, replenishing ingredients available. Night is infused with a light and refreshing peppermint scent. This natural, untinted, unshimmered balm  is the perfect night-stand accessory.

One lucky winner will be chosen and contacted via Facebook on Wednesday, April 30th in order to be sent the package in time for Mother’s Day (just be sure you check your Facebook account on Wednesday in case you win, so you can get Tess & James the right mailing address in time for May 11th!). Good luck!

11 Sensual Gifts for May 11th (Mother’s Day)

April 17, 2014


Flowers are okay. But moms like other stuff too: soft stuff, scented stuff, stress-relieving stuff, sexy stuff. Okay, so maybe you don’t want to get your Mom (or the mother of your children) a big ol’ dildo for Mother’s Day. But let’s try to think outside the vase. Below are some great gifts (for any budget) that she’ll really appreciate as a living, breathing human being (not a “domestic goddess”). Whatever you do, don’t get her another Edible Arrangement!



“Relax Me” Fizzy Bath Balls

$4 each









These individually wrapped balls turn a bath into a bubbly cocktail of aromas and soothing salts. A calming mixture of luscious oils, baking soda, and intoxicating fragrance, Relax Me is the perfect ending to Mom’s extra-long day (and they’re all extra-long). Choose from English Lavender, Pear Vanilla, Pomegranate Mint, or Morning Dew. They’re body-safe and animal-product free, contain natural ingredients, and are made in the USA.



Soft Sleeping Mask











Help Mom get a better night’s rest with soft and comfortable mask. The elastic band allows for a snug fit without putting undue pressure on the eyes. And, hey, if she can find another use for it — wink, wink, kink, kink — good for her!



Luna Beads









Know a new mom? Or maybe an older one with sneeze-pee issues? Help them out with the best selling Kegel exercisers in the world: Luna Beads are designed to strengthen and tone pelvic floor muscles to improve pelvic health (which will probably intensify orgasms, but you don’t have to tell Mom that if you don’t want to). Made from body-safe materials and easy to clean, Luna Beads can be worn one or two at a time for a custom workout.



Contour Ceramic Massage Stones









Who needs massage therapy more than moms? This award-winning, body-friendly, double-fired porcelain massager by JimmyJane is hygienic, non-porous, and easy to clean. These versatile massagers can be warmed up or cooled down for added sensation and their shapes allow for limitless possibilities for sensual or deep-tissue massage techniques (dome face down for long, smooth strokes, or flipped over for pressure point stimulation with the rounded corners).



Flickering Touch Massage Candle










Made from all natural soy wax, Shea butter and apricot kernel oil, Lelo’s Flickering Touch Massage Candle melts into a pool of luxurious massage oil designed to nourish and moisturize skin with natural vitamin E. These Lelo candles have a burn-time of up to 35-hours and come in three light scents: Black pepper & pomegranate; snow pear and cedarwood; vanilla and creme de cacao.



What Makes a Baby










It’s not exactly a sensual gift, but almost any mom will feel warm and fuzzy reading this awesomely inclusive book of reproductive love to their kids. Visually engaging, informative, and supportive, “What Makes a Baby” explains to kids from any kind of family where they came from. It’s a great jumping-off point for more discussion with kids about bodies and families by a certified sexuality educator (Cory Silverberg) and an award-winning artist/illustrator (Fiona Smyth). For preschool-age 8.



Kimono Robe










Lelo’s vintage kimono robe is made from the finest heavy weight silk crepe satin. With tulip sleeves and soft contouring, this opulent, short-length kimono features contrast facing and piping, a silk crepe satin tie up sash, and a discreet interior tie for extra hold. A nice alternative to the old terrycloth number she’s probably wearing out.



Burberry for Women Eau de Parfum


Steer clear of the trashy celebrity perfumes by the likes of Paris Hilton and Britney, and go for pure, classic class: Burberry for Women Eau de Parfum is a fresh and sensual fragrance with fruity top notes of blackcurrant, fresh green apple and bright bergamot. Heart notes of cedar wood, jasmine, and moss are intensified with warm notes of sandalwood for a rich and sensual tone. Warm notes of musk and vanilla smooth the base. Presented in a glass, 100ml bottle. Made in France, natch.



Yoga for Beginners Boxed Set


If Mom isn’t into yoga yet, it’s just a matter of time. Help her pull the yoga trigger with this popular 3-DVD box set that contains Yoga for Stress Relief, AM-PM Yoga for Beginners, and Essential Yoga for Inflexible People (and you know what flexibility is good for). Forty different routines focus on different physical and mental aspects of yoga, such as building strength, improving flexibility, reducing stress, etc.



Molton Brown Seamoss Stress-Relieving Hydrosoak


Is Mom in need of a deep-sea de-stress? Of course she is! She can dive into the blue waters of Molton Brown’s oceanic bath salts, made with marine extracts, Dead Sea salts and horse chestnut. The scent is energizing and the scrub clarifying.



Original Magic Wand











Okay, okay, we know. But seriously, this is an awesome stress-melting back massager. Really. Whatever else Mom might figure out to do with it in the privacy of her own bedroom is her business — you don’t need to know about it.



Lelo’s Golden Kegel Balls Are Fifty Shades of Luxury

April 10, 2014


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The latest luxury product from our friends at LELO — and this one is no joke! — is a high-end version of their bestselling Luna Beads. Worn one or two at a time, Luna Beads Luxe are offered in either stainless steel or 20-karat gold, and their price points are pure Christian Grey (stainless steel retails for $2090; gold for $3090). Which makes them (a) the most exclusive pleasure beads in the world and (b) most likely out of your price range! But, hey, every vagina likes to splurge every now and then.

Like LELO’s original Luna Beads ($47) — and their stylish counterpart, Luna Beads Noir ($34) — these golden kegel balls (seriously, isn’t it worth the investment just to say you own a pair of golden kegel balls?!) respond to a woman’s movements while she wears them, subtly vibrating internally. And if they’re worn regularly over time, they lead to longer and stronger orgasms. (Hello? Priceless!)

Christian Grey famously told Anastasia that he would like to dictate her gym schedule, in order to keep her in shape for marathon kinky sex sessions. We’re pretty sure he would have assigned her a kegel workout with Luna Beads Luxe, too, had they been available at the time. Possible plot twist for the movie, perhaps? Also, can we all please now agree to show up to the cinema for the Fifty Shades of Grey movie actually wearing our kegel balls? That way we’re guaranteed some pleasure from the experience, no matter how bad the dialogue turns out to be.

In LELO’s own words,  Luna Beads Luxe ”offer a daring and tantalizing look into a world that knows no limits. A world where innermost desires are created, pursued and ultimately achieved. Worn one or two at a time, the 20-karat gold beads vibrate in harmony with the wearer’s movements, rewarding her choice to indulge this secret fantasy. As the most luxurious addition to foreplay, this beautiful set is the ultimate expression of one’s innermost fantasies.” The set is part of LELO’s Luxe Collection, which also includes the $15,000 Inez, the most exclusive vibrator ever made. (Guaranteed to make your other sex toys feel shabby and insignificant!)

Here’s what you get for your money with the Luna Beads Luxe:

• A Discreet Taste of Luxury for Sensational Couples’ Play
• Limitless Versatility for Fun Inside and Outside the Bedroom
• 2 x 47g Beads with Soft Silicone Girdle
• 2-year Warranty and 10-year Guarantee

Not to mention the brag value of being able to drop the following line into casual conversation: I have a vagina of steel.

Read more about Luna Beads Luxe at LELO.com


Is LELO’s 1st Ever Right-Handed Vibrator For Reals?

April 2, 2014



It was just another in a long line of clever Internet April Fool’s jokes yesterday. Last year, our favorite pleasure object creators — LELO — “put out” the world’s first Ikea-style sex toy called GÄSM; and this year they “invented” a squeezable vibrating object called DEXTRÜS that was supposed to allow right-handed people to tap into the as-yet-unrealized creativity, intelligence, and pleasure the left-handed have enjoyed since the dawn of mankind. Hey, it sounded cool to us! And even their fake banners looked beautiful and sophisticated (see below).

Even though there is no DEXTRÜS, there is still a grand prize: a $200 gift certificate to use at LELO.com! So a big CONGRATULATIONS to our winner drawn at random: Amanda B! And thanks to everyone else who entered our LELO contest — you came really close!

So pay attention to all our future LELO contests: even when they’re not real, you can still win big!



Win the World’s First Ever Right-Handed Vibrator

March 27, 2014


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Are you left or right-handed? You probably already knew that your answer affects your creativity, intelligence, and odds of becoming President — but did you know it can also affect how much you enjoy sex? New research out of Sweden shows that left-handed people are up to 86% more sexually satisfied than their right-handed counterparts. This finding prompted LELO to launch DEXTRÜS, the world’s first ever right-handed vibrator. And we’re offering you the exclusive chance to win this brand new toy! (Scroll down for contest details.)

Custom-created for right-handed people, DEXTRÜS is LELO’s most groundbreaking project yet, with applications in both the bedroom and the workplace, allowing more than 90% of the world’s population to tap into the as-yet-unrealized creativity, intelligence, and pleasure that the left-handed have enjoyed since the dawn of mankind.

How DEXTRÜS Works:

  • FOR LEFT-HANDED ORGASMS: With new Right-Squeeze™ technology, right-handed users continually squeeze DEXTRÜS with their left-hand during lovemaking. Every squeeze causes DEXTRÜS to emit a series of randomized vibration patterns that allow the user to enter a left-handed and right-brained state of mind and double the intensity of their orgasm.
  • FOR A LEG-UP IN YOUR CAREER: DEXTRÜS is the first ever sex toy to penetrate the modern workplace, as users squeeze the silicone shell during meetings and brainstorming sessions to enhance their natural spontaneity. The whisper-quiet vibrations travel up the left arm as users squeeze DEXTRÜS to stimulate the right side of the brain, blocking out other distractions and encouraging more creative thought.

DEXTRÜS will cost $399 and will be available soon at LELO.com and other high-end retail outlets. But one lucky EMandLO.com reader will be first to try it out! Here’s how to enter our DEXTRÜS contest:

  • Mention and link to the world’s first right-handed pleasure object on Facebook and/or Twitter.
  • Let us know you’ve done so by mailing us a screenshot of each FB post/Tweet (on a Mac, Command+Shiftshift+4 lets you drag and capture an area of the screen; click here for instructions on taking screenshots on either a PC or a Mac).
  • The more you share, the greater your chances of winning! Deadline for entries is midnight on Tuesday, April 1st, Pacific Time.
  • We’ll announce the winner of the new $399 LELO toy soon thereafter!


Baby It’s Cold Outside: 5 Toys to Warm You Up

March 6, 2014


Summer lovin’ is all about al fresco sex and stripping down. Polar vortex sex, on the other hand, means hibernating with a loved one (or your own sweet self) and keeping things warm… or, better yet, hot. Here are five ways to do just that.

1. Blossom Organics Warming Lube ($15)
Warming lubricants often contain chemicals or artificial flavorings that can irritate sensitive lady parts (not to mention taste awful). This lube, on the other hand, is pH-balanced to mimic a woman’s natural chemistry, and contains no harsh parabens, petrochemicals, silicones, glycerin, alcohol, hormones, pesticides, artificial dyes, flavorings or fragrances. Phew! Organic botanical ingredients create the warmth in this lube that’s water-based and latex-friendly.



2. Ambiance Luxury Massage Candles ($24)
These scented soy wax candles can be drizzled over bare skin (be sure to blow out the flame first!) for a warm, sensual massage… or some saucy temperature play. Conveniently, the melting point of soy wax is too low to cause burns, but high enough to heat things up — and when it’s rubbed into the skin, it acts as a massage oil. Available in four cozy fragrances: Pear Vanilla, Warm Amber, Fresh Bouquet, and Juniper Lime.



3. Inferno Glass Dildo ($180)
This hand-crafted hard glass dildo — don’t worry, it’s made of sodalime glass, so it won’t shatter like a wine glass! — is colored to look like a flame, with textured tones of red and yellow — we’re warming up just looking at it. And the best thing about a glass dildo like this is that it can be warmed (or cooled, though we don’t recommend that in a Polar Vortex!) for sensation play — just run it under warm (not boiling) water. This dildo has a bulbous head, contoured concave shaft, and two bubble-like ridges at the opposite end for varying sensations. Not recommended for use in a harness.


4. Verspanken WaterWieners ($22.50)
This is an accessory for the Verspanken Masturbator for men ($40), which is a self-love toy that offers a guy varying pressures and textures. And now, with this accessory, the Verspanken can provide varying temperatures, too! The two liquid-filled inserts can be warmed in warm water (or cooled in the freezer if you’re a polar bear) to add a touch of temperature play to the guy’s masturbation experience.



5. Contour Ceramic Massage Stones ($25)
These massage stones by Jimmyjane are made of body-friendly porcelain, which means they can be warmed up (or cooled down, in summer) for added sensation. Better yet, you can pour warm massage oil into the dome, transforming the massager into a spout that lets you drizzle the oil onto your partner. The creative shape allows for both long, smooth strokes and also deep-tissue massage techniques and pressure point stimulation. Plus, the ceramic is non-porous, meaning these stones are super easy to clean.


3 Ways to Win 3 Different Lelo’s This International Women’s Day

March 4, 2014


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In honor of International Women’s Day this Saturday, March 8th, LELO is giving away premium pleasure items for free, as a sort of ‘thank you’ for all the incredible gains, triumphs and advances in female empowerment that have made LELO possible.

If you’re a user of Pinterest, Twitter or Facebook (or all three), then you’ve got a great chance of winning an amazing new LELO for yourself. Each social media platform gives you a chance to win a different LELO, with every 100 entries seeing us giving away another prize – take part in all three and increase your chances of winning! See the details for each entry method below.

You can also take advantage of great savings at LELO.com with discount code EMLO14, good for 20% OFF until Monday, March 10th.



Win Hula Beads on Pinterest

Pin one – or all three – of the images in the Pinterest section of this LELO page, and for every one hundred pins LELO will give away one set of HULA Beads™, their rotating and vibrating pleasure beads. Simply place your cursor over the image you want and click ‘Pin it’, and keep it hashtagged #LELOVEWOMEN so LELO can find your Pin!




Win Ora on twitter

Win the amazing new ORA™ personal massager by retweeting the tweet you see below. Again, for every 100 retweets, LELO adds another ORA™ to the prize pool, so tell all the members of your TwitFam!




win IDA on facebook

Entries on Facebook are eligible to win LELO’s revolutionary couples’ massager IDA™, which rotates and vibrates to make lovemaking even more fantastic for both him and her.

So tell LELO in the Facebook comments at the bottom of this LELO page: who’s the most inspiring woman you look up to? Every 100 replies means another winner – feel free to tell your friends!



And don’t forget to take advantage of great savings at LELO.com with discount code EMLO14, good for 20% OFF until Monday, March 10th!


Fifty Shades of… Vanilla?

February 13, 2014


photo via flickr | sponsored post

Back in January we wrote about new research from LELO showing that the kinky sex revolution is waning: Sales of toys such as whips and teasers reached a plateau in the last quarter of 2013, compared with a 50% increase over the same period in 2012. Meanwhile, sales of premium couples massagers and vibrating couples’ rings worn during intercourse increased by 82%, compared with the same period last year.

Anyway, we promised at the time that even more research was forthcoming from LELO, with some initial findings from their 2014 Global Sex Survey. One of our favorite stats so far: One in five women has been involved in a threesome — double that of 2012’s findings — but a whopping 80% of women said that making their fantasies real didn’t live up to their expectations. One to grow on, folks.

In case you were worried that this trend toward “vanilla” sex means we’ll all end up lying back and thinking of England, fear not! This is fifty shades of vanilla (with a cherry on top), which includes everything from threeways to love rings to clitoral vibrators. In other words, this might not be Christian Grey territory, but it’s certainly not your parents’ vanilla sex life, either.

The survey is open for the rest of the 2014 — click here to take part yourself (and you’ll get 20% off your next LELO purchase!). In the meantime, check out the infographic below for even more stats from the LELO sex survey so far…


The Best Naughty Valentine’s Day Gift Sets

February 10, 2014




For the Massage Junkie:










Rub Me The Right Way Kit, $39

  • 1 Ambiance Massage Candle Pear Vanilla
  • 1 Lust Dust Honey Vanilla
  • 1 Rub Me Massage Bar Morning Dew
  • 1 Devour Me Lickable Body Oil Pina Colada
  • 1 Relax Me Fizzy Ball French Vanilla


For the Fifty Shades Fan:










Dare Me Pleasure Set, $119

  • Luna Beads Noir
  • Sensua Suede Whip black
  • Etherea Silk Cuffs Black


For the Traveling Business Man:










Members Only Kit, $19

  • 1 Please Stroke Cream 1/2 oz.
  • 1 Tenga Egg Masturbation Sleeve
  • 1 RingO Rangler Stretchy Penis Ring
  • 1 Please Liquid Lube 5mL sample
  • 1 Please Cream Lube 5mL sample
  • 1 Please Gel Lube 5mL sample


For the Lazy Lover:










Adore Me Pleasure Set, $139

  • Mia 2 Rechargeable USB Vibrator in Red
  • Intima Silk Blindfold in Red
  • Sutra Chain Link Cuffs in Red


For the Backdoor-Curious:










Prostate Pleasure Kit, $75

  • The Ultimate Guide To Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration For Men And Their Partners
  • Aneros MGX
  • Please Gel Lubricant 2oz



For the Uninitiated:










Hearts on Fire Kit, $18

  • 1 Waterproof Mini Bullet Vibrator
  • 1 Ignite Me Massage Candle 1 oz
  • 1 Mini Rub Me Massage Bar 1 oz
  • 1 Please Warming Lubricant Sample 5 ml

And the LELO for Best Oral Sex Haiku Goes To…

February 4, 2014

1 Comment

Thank you for your many, many entries into our LELO Oral Sex Haiku Contest! You guys sure do like oral (or oral sex simulators… or LELO pleasure objects of any kind). And thank you especially for heeding to our wishes to leave the explicit stuff on the cutting room floor. Instead, you used beautiful images (from petals unfurling to hummingbirds descending), clever metaphors (from the tide’s arrival to a good book), and a sense of humor (blatant pandering, “FaceTime”) — and one of you even submitted a haiku in Japanese, with an English translation. Now that’s the way we like to haiku about oral sex!

We were incredibly torn when it came to picking a winner, but in the end it came down to Monica A., because she submitted so many wonderful haikus — thirty-seven in total, and any one of them could have been a winner. Congratulations to Monica, she wins a LELO Ora! (And not just because she managed to get “Em and Lo dot com” and “Ora” in a single haiku!) Monica, we hope you receive many years of pleasure — and not a single broken heart or complaint about “high-maintenance demands” — from  your oral sex simulator.

Below Monica’s winning entry, you’ll find our Thirty-Three Honorable Mentions. Yes, thirty-frickin’-three: You guys rocked this one!


Mouth on my pistil
I feel like a loaded gun
Lick lick, bang bang boom
– Monica A.

TOP 33 HONORABLE MENTIONS (in no particular order):

How about you go
first and then do me…ok
fine, we’ll sixty-nine.
– Colleen

Pages of my book
Read in detail by your tongue
The perfect bookmark
– Erin D.

Em and lo dot com,
Oral pleasure makes me smile
Ora should be mine!
– Monica A.

I am the quiver
Of sixty thousand starlings
Pulsing as they soar.
– Karah

Kimi no uta,
Yume no kaze desu,
Subarashi yo.

Your music,
The wind in my dream,
It’s wonderful.
– Heather

Who cares about size
Does your tongue work properly?
If so, we’ll be fine
– Monica A.

Peering through the moss
You discover, of all things,
A pearl to be kissed
– Inness

iPhones make me smirk;
“FaceTime” just means something else –
Him pleasuring me
– Monica A.

Eager, lustful wolf
Approaches my flowing stream
Longingly takes sips
– Anna Nicole

What do you mean you
don’t do that? Seriously,
you’re kidding right? Next!
– Colleen

A love note for you –
Spreading you across my desk,
My tongue is the pen…
– Monica A.

ocean waves seduce
lapping at forbidden shores
high tide is coming
– Chris

You’re taller than I,
So it’s a unique pleasure,
Gripping your thick hair
– Inness

Waves lap swollen shores
Until the levee explodes,
Chasing back the sea.
– Karah

wave washed stones, polished
and smooth, as a love song from
the lovelorn ocean.
– Colleen

My lover descends:
A velvet-tongued hummingbird,
Earning my nectar.
– Karah

flickering so fast
flickering woodpecker, oh
wood dont stand a chance
– Tawana

glistening pink rose
peel back each lovely petal,
slowly, rise with sun
– Amy

drowning in a sea
first a ripple, a wave, crash
then floating in bliss
– Amy

A ring of Saturn
Continues to spin nonstop
beautiful colors
– Tawana

Explore the ocean
Search for the man in the boat
Ahoy! you found him
– Tawana

Just a few quick flicks
And I’m where I need to be
Just Ora and me
– Monica A.

Fire passes through me
Underneath love’s canopy
Eat, live, be happy.
– Monica A.

Two is a party
Ready to rock my body
Just Ora and me
– Monica A.

Tongue play is heaven
She touched me once and I learned
Girls do it better
– Monica A.

I have a secret
It’s locked up inside of me
Your tongue is the key
– Monica A.

Her petals unfurl
Under gray dawn’s humid kiss.
The dew drops quiver.
– Karah

Your tongue like an oar
Row my boat faster, harder
Make me come ashore
– Monica A.

A haiku or two
To get me off without you –
Don’t mind if I do.
– Karah

I moan, “Oh my God,”
Bless my body with your tongue
I am no angel.
– Monica A.

Taste my galaxy…
Celestial chaos builds,
Eyes closed… stars explode
– Monica A.

With closed eyes I see
The shimmer of distant suns
Lit by my pleasure.
– Karah

I’m a slip’n’slide,
But don’t slip inside. That’s right –
Stay down there and lick!
– Karah

Read more about the Ora by LELO here