3/8/12
Top 20 Celebrities with Awesome Porn Names

A recent article in Salon about trends in porn names (disturbingly, there is apparently a “direct correlation between trendy baby names and porn stars’ names”) got us thinking about celebrities whose names are perfectly designed for a post-career-slump porno. Here are our top 10 favorite male and female celebrities with porn names:

  1. Tiffani-Amber Thiessen (she even spells Tiffani with an i!)
  2. Tiffani Thiessen (sorry, Tiff, but your new “grownup” moniker is barely less porny than the original)
  3. Britney Spears
  4. Scarlett Johansson
  5. Megan Fox
  6. Demi Moore (the “classy” porn star name)
  7. Lisa Bonet
  8. Evangeline Lilly (the “sophisticated” porn star name)
  9. Angelina Jolie
  10. Courteney Cox

And now for the gents…

  1. Don Johnson (a classic old school porn name)
  2.  Lance Armstrong
  3. Jon Hamm
  4. Jamie Foxx (the extra X is for sexy, we take it?)
  5. Peter Dinklage
  6. Antonio Banderas (just saying that name out loud sounds like dirty talk)
  7. Vin Diesel (we wouldn’t be surprised if he actually chose this name in preparation for a future move to porn)
  8. Sylvester Stallone
  9. Arnold Schwarzenegger (isn’t Schwarzenegger German for penis?)
  10. Rick Santorum (niche porn is all the rage, Ricky)

13 Comments

  1. How could we have forgotten these?

    DL Hugely (in this case, the “g” would not be silent)

    The Bush Twins

    Magic Johnson (of course)

  2. It works for men too:

    obvious:
    Dick Armey
    Vin Diesel
    Andy Dick
    Lance Armstrong

    2-syllable:
    Brad Pitt
    Tom Cruise
    Jack Black

    and pretty much the entire ’88 Bears, namely:
    Dick Butkus

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