Comment of the Week: Dug-Up Dirt Is Inadmissible Evidence

Sometimes our comments of the week are really funny, sometimes they’re extremely informative. This week, we thought this one would be good fodder for debate:

Bit of a broad question… it’s like asking “Do men cheat?” Some men do, some men don’t, some women do, some women don’t. I dumped my GF hard and fast for snooping on me a few months back. Two words: inadmissible evidence. I will not even discuss whatever a woman may find if she snoops on me. I immediately shut the discussion down and break up. Even if she makes her way back into my life, she will never, ever get closure from me regarding what what she saw. That’s my default policy on snooping: inadmissible evidence. You don’t even have the right to mention it to me.

Johnny, commenting on “Wise Guys: Do Men Snoop on Their Partners?” Please to discuss:

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11 Comments on "Comment of the Week: Dug-Up Dirt Is Inadmissible Evidence"

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You are dead wrong, lovely87. Some people are curious, nosy, suspicious… there will always be snoops. But let me differentiate between a snoop and a raid. Snooping is unwarranted. No evidence, or only circumstatial evidence, to suggest fault. In a raid, you’re quite convinced something’s wrong, and YOU INTEND TO BREAK IT OFF when you find proof. See, too many women think they can dig up stuff that’s really none of their business (like the aforementioned porn mags), and give you shit about it indefinitely. Or demand that you change. Richard’s got the right idea. You looked for trouble, and… Read more »

If people didn’t lie and give other people reason to doubt then snooping wouldn’t happen… period


I, out of sheer intuition,opened a drawer of my BF and found evidence he cheated on me, this was extremely painful and as yet I have not decided what to do. Yes I snooped but found the truth,I would rather this happen now than find out a few more years down the line….Cheating is wrong….snooping, I think , means the person being cheated on already knows something is wrong…


If you are in the wrong, then you have done wrong. No matter who finds out certain information and in whatever manner.. the person who cheats is bad… plain and simple.

Well, a couple of things. My personal creed is that if you go looking for trouble and find it, that’s your problem. So, if you snoop on a BF or GF and find something, you need to take a step back and figure out how serious the relationship is and then make a decision at that time. I know age is no delimiter, but young people tend to be more, well, experimental, than older or more settled people typically are. At least that was true in my case. No matter what my situation was, if the opportunity presented itself, even… Read more »

So if a woman finds out that on your internet history, or under your bed you have spank mags of guys dicking each other, she has no right to say anything to you? Sounds like it gives you carte blanche to be a grade A A-hole.

I would hope if a woman discovered that or something similiar…she wouldn’t care what your policy is and leave your sorry duplicitous ass where she last saw you!

Johnny, don’t take it so hard. I get where you’re coming from (and I’m not being ironic this time). I just had to say something for all of those people out there without your circumstances and personal priorities (everyone wants something different in a relationship), who would take your comment and use it for evil. There are guys and girls who would sleep around, and see the snooping as the only wrong. I, personally, think just -talking- to someone, if it’s a strong relationship, is the best way to go; if you feel you have to snoop, it’s a sure… Read more »