Reader Lila wrote the following in response to the recent article “Confession: I’m a BDSM Beginner” on our site:

I love this post! That was MY life a few years ago. While I found my kink differently than you, I am still a professional woman with an education and a life. I just needed to figure out how to get the BIG WHAMMY… I want to tell you two things:

1) I found it and it is AWESOME! My sweet pet lets me be MYSELF, kinky, loving, rough,sweet, bitchy, tender and he loves it all!

2) It IS possible to have a relationship that is kinky and filthy as hell, and “normal” loving, working, having lives and appearing to be entirely vanilla! If you saw us on the street, you would not see anything other than two professional people holding hands. The families do not know, the friends do not know (ok the friends in kink know, but that’s another story!), and we just have a great life! It is possible, I am living and loving it now!