Comment of the Week: Self Doubt Ain’t Sexy

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Short term, you could probably get away with [covering your breasts during sex]. Long term, no way – and you shouldn’t try.

Look, I don’t know what your boobs are like, but any (decent) guy who might be disappointed by them will be more disappointed by your crippling self-doubt. You don’t have to “learn to love them,” but you do have to learn to accept that none of us have perfect bodies – not even supermodels. Grown-up guys (aka “men”) don’t expect perfection. And if they love you for you, they’ll love your boobs, however imperfect they may be (and I neither confirm nor deny that they’re imperfect!).

All that said, you have no obligation to lead with them on night one; and when the time comes take a moment to have a talk with your lover first and tell him you’re insecure about your breasts. A good one will pull through.

Finally, being in a secure relationship is all about being vulnerable. My partner knows all my warts, even the ones that I can barely admit to myself. It feels good when you get there – trust me.

E.M., responding to the post “Your Call: Can She Keep Her Boobs Covered Up During Sex?”

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2 Comments on "Comment of the Week: Self Doubt Ain’t Sexy"

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LJ Maggie

It is so important to find a guy who loves every inch of your body, no matter what you think it looks like. He will love your imperfections. I am a curvy girl and found a guy who told me before we even went out that he likes curvy girls. I was insecure around him at first but he made me feel comfortable the first time we were intimate with each other by touching every inch of me.


Hey, find a guy like me. Breast do not matter.Heck. How shallow can guys be. I don’t have a huge *&^%. But, what I like is going down on a women and giving her multiples. If you leave it natural I am happier. But, it is your body. Move on from the guys who want this or that. They are not worth the time. A real man will accept you and respect you for being who you are and accepting his, the same way. Good Luck Goddess. Your turning heads for the better, SMILE.