photo by robbie_jim
A few days ago, we got this comment in response to the Wise Guy piece “Do Men Care What Labia Look Like?” and all its comments:
Amy Lee Says:
May 19th, 2012 at 4:57 am e
Well,I have large labia and I was hoping to get some assurance from all these men that have commented and I gotta say,I’m even more self concious. I feel as if I will end up alone because of it and I don’t want to have surgery. The only comment that has made me feel a little better was ” If a man loves you,he shouldn’t be put off why what your labia looks like. If he is,he’s obviously not worth your time.” On here it’s all about the ‘perfect’ porn star labias. Which I don’t have,unfortunately…
Say what? Did we miss something? We know our Wise Guys didn’t post anything demoralizing, because we don’t have any Wise Guys who are assholes. Did we somehow miss a slew of comments by a bunch of juvenille trolls? Because the readers of this site are usually pretty cool, like take-home-to-meet-your-parents cool.
So we decided to reread the post and read through all 50 comments for anything we might have missed. The Wise Guys totally checked out — we review everything that goes up on this site before it goes up and are still as content with the content now as we were on the day it went up. The honest, straightforward consensus of the three guys is basically that porn might be creating an impossible “beauty” standard that only a small minority of idiots who can’t decipher fantasy from reality ignorantly choose to buy into, but that the vast majority of straight men are interested in clean, excited labia attached to hopefully body-confident women who are interested in them.
And out of all the 50 comments, only 2 were offensive, rude and stupid. At least one of them if not both of them should have been deleted, since we expect (and usually get) a certain amount of civility from our commenters — these unfortunately just slipped through the cracks (“The Bachelor” must have been on or something when they came in).
But even so, we’re perplexed as to why anyone would focus on the petty little comments of a few sad, sorry, hateful people when more than 40 others responded with reassurance and sensitivity. There will always be a few sociopathic douchbags in this world who enjoy anonymously shitting on strangers from the comfort of their parents’ basement couch. But we’d encourage Amy and everyone else to refrain from dignifying their online vomiting by giving them any emotional power over you and instead focus on the outpouring of positivity from the massive majority. Here’s a sample:
If a guy is with someone he wants to be with for who she is as a complete person, how her labia look doesn’t really matter — he’s just thrilled to get to be intimate with her, and all her parts.
As long as they work, it doesn’t much matter what they look like.
I think all labias are beautiful.
Genitals are not meant to look pretty, but to be functional and feel good. When everyone is happy and excited they will not worry about genital fashions or fads.
If you are naked in front of a guy, and he sees you have longer inner labia hes not going to say “ew, get dressed and leave. RIGHT NOW” No. He’s going to be glad your naked and hoping you’re not thinking about his extra stomach hair or the way one of his balls is bigger than the other. Big deal. No one cares.
Real women don’t have airbrushed labia.
Ladies, rest assured that the variations of that beautiful flower you’re sporting are not a subject for scrutiny with any but the most inexperienced and juvenile men.
The guys are saying that labias that are clean, fresh, warm, wet, ready and willing to be touched, tasted, celebrated, explored and enjoyed that belong to a welcoming secure, self confident and sexy woman who is right there with them are all beautiful.
As long as they do what they are meant to do, Who Cares!
Confidence and sex drive are far more important to a guy’s positive experience with you than the specifics of whether or not you look like some kind of idealized porn “norm”.
Men love real women and real vaginas. They’re so happy that theyre getting laid and so happy that you are into them, they could care less about the size of your labia.
Labia, smabia. All looks are intriguing to connoisseurs of sensuality.
We could go on.