Dear Dr. Kate,
Why am I not wet sometimes, even when I am turned on?
Sometimes your body hasn’t caught up to your brain. Sometimes a medication causes decreased lubrication (antihistamines are a big culprit), or it’s a reaction to the condoms or spermicide. It might be stress or anxiety, or even smoking or drinking before sex. And pain with sex can certainly make you dry. But in most cases, you simply need more focused foreplay before intercourse — and it’s okay to expect it. You wouldn’t expect him to enter you before he’s erect, right? If you’re stilling feeling dryer than you’d like after that kind of attention, there’s no shame in adding a high-quality, water-based lubricant to the mix.
— Dr. Kate
Dr. Kate is an OB/GYN at one of the largest teaching hospitals in New York City. She also lectures nationally on women’s health issues and conducts research on reproductive health. She generously shares her medical wisdom with EM & LO readers every few weeks. Check out more of her advice and ask her a question at Gynotalk.com.