8/15/17
Do It Tonight! Get Speakers for Your Sex Life

No, we’re not talking about broadcasting the dying-cow sound of your orgasm for all your neighbors to hear. We’re talking about getting some decent speakers for your sex life, i.e. to put in your bedroom so you can do it to decent-sounding music.

Tunes can really help set a mood. (There’s a good reason why movies always set the sex scene to surround-sound music.) But having those tunes come out of a tinny little alarm-clock radio or your wafer thin iPhone on your night-stand can work against that mood when you’re acting out your own sex scene.

You don’t have to go big or pricey. Get something like Cyber Acoustics 2.1 Computer Speaker with Subwoofer: put a speaker on either side of the bed (for balanced sound) and — now this is essential — put the subwoofer under the middle of your bed by the headboard. Then just plug your smartphone or mp3 player into the system and you’re good to go. If you don’t have a gift for making cool or appropriate playlists, try Pandora.com or Spotify, two of the greatest inventions of the 21st century: you create your own “station” by plugging in a song or artist you like into their database, and they automatically and immediately create an endless playlist of similar stuff — all for freakin’ free (though it’s worth paying to avoid the distracting and mood-killing commercials)!

For perennially good dramatic sex music, try entering “Massive Attack” (but only if it’s dark out and you’ve lit some candles). Fucking a Fifty Shades fan? Plug in the soundtrack. You can also try some emo love songs for your inner angsty teen. And, of course, you can’t go wrong with Prince’s sexiest songs.

This post has been updated.

Get the full experience:
6 Ways to Stimulate Your Senses During Sex

3 Comments

  1. Thanks! When I was setting up the sound system in my living room I was told to put the woofer against a wall facing out, so I assumed there was some sort of directional component. At this point I just have to find one that will fit under my bed. The one you recommended had some less than stellar reviews so I’m doing a little research to see if there’s a comparably sized/priced system with a little more durability.

  2. According to our tech god friend, sub woofers aren’t directional — the sound radiates out in all directions — so just put it on the ground the way that it looks like you should. For example, with the brand we recommend, it’s got four little legs you stand it on, and although it LOOKS like the speaker part of it is on the bottom, again, the bass just radiates out. But if you’re still not convinced, just try turning it in different ways to see if that has any effect, good or bad. (We just wouldn’t place it in such a way that it’s cords are getting squished.)

  3. One question, should you set up the sub woofer normally, meaning facing forward under the bed with it’s back against the headboard/wall?

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