6/6/16
Should She Dump Her Boyfriend Over Trump?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call on the letter below by leaving your advice in the comments section. 

I’m a staunch democrat, my boyfriend is a fiscal conservative but socially liberal. And he’s seriously considering voting for Donald Trump in November because he hates Hillary Clinton, and it’s breaking my heart. He thinks Donald Trump is, deep down, a democrat, who’s just saying absolutely anything to get conservative votes; he thinks Trump wouldn’t really do all the things he’s said he will if he actually gets in office; and he won’t even consider the third party Libertarian candidate — even though Gary Johnson’s much more aligned with his own values — because he thinks that would just be handing Clinton the White House.

As a woman, a feminist, and a caring human being, it really disturbs me that someone I love and care about would throw his vote away on a person I believe is truly dangerous to this country — dangerous to reproductive rights, LGBTQ rights, religious freedom, freedom of the press, immigrants & foreigners, foreign relations….the list goes on.

The problem is, my boyfriend and I have a wonderful relationship. We love each other, we get along great, the sex is fabulous, and we share the same interests except in this one area. I’m so, so confused by this. If it weren’t for our political differences, I’d probably consider marrying this guy down the road. But I’m just not sure I can be with someone who supports a politician who’s personality and policies I find so morally reprehensible. I feel like it should be a deal breaker. Am I overreacting?

— “Mary Matalin”

What Should M.M. do?
Let her know in the comments below:

 

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11 Comments on "Should She Dump Her Boyfriend Over Trump?"

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Kanawah

First tell your boyfriend that Trump is not a conservative, he is some where between an oligarch and a fascist. He also changes his position on almost everything faster then the weather in the Ohio valley changes

On the “social liberal”, Trump is in no way a social liberal. He only cares about “social” things that affect the rich.

If he insist on voting for Trump, you may want to seriously consider finding a new boy friend, because if that is his perspective (which makes no sense)he will be nothing but trouble.

Dave
I think this is an easy answer. If you can’t respect the person you are with, you are probably with the wrong person. I don’t agree with a lot of the things my wife believes but when I talk to her about them I can see why she believes them and I can respect her position even if I think it isn’t quite right. (Note: she has also swayed my opinion on some issues after these conversations). So if your boyfriends support for Trump means you can’t respect him anymore then you should probably move on. In general, I don’t… Read more »
Ralphie
It is really a question you have to address yourself. Is your boyfriend’s political views a deal breaker. Relationships between political opposites can work. One of the best known examples is James Carville and Mary Matalin. Carville helped get Bill Clinton into the White House. Matalin worked in key positions for George H.W. Bush, both in his election and re-election campaigns. They were involved during the 1992 election and married in 1993. While you may find your boyfriend’s support for Trump repugnant, it does not mean that you cannot work around your differences. However, whether or not you want to… Read more »
Johnny

Here’s something to think about before you go all, “caring human beings vote for Hilary,” though: Hilary Clinton – and this is what I’ll never forgive her for – voted in favor of the probably illegal, definitely immoral, and definitely DEFINITELY unjustified invasion of Iraq. Thousands upon thousands of Iraqi civilians – and some terrorists, probably, but lots and lots of civilians – died beneath American shells. Hilary Clinton voted for that.

Glenn Johnson

Actual all the senators voted for was to give the President the authorization to invade I raq. That’s not the same as voting to go to war. The DMV gives me the authorization to drive my car. If I choose to drive my car into a crowd of people and kill them is the DMV responsible?

Johnny

If the DMV knew that your intention was to drive that car into a crowd as soon as you got your license, yes, I would say that the DMV is partially responsible.

Glenn Johnson

If they knew. She had no way of knowing what Bush was going to do. Plus this was just after 9/11 and the mood of the country was far different than it is now or even a year or two after.

Kanawah

Johnny,
On your comment about Hillary voting to go into Iraq, she, like many others in congress, was lied to by G W Bush and his cabal of idiots. So, you cannot really blame Hillary for her vot3e on this subject.

Johnny
… and there’s my long-held personal grudge against Clinton. When I was in college my PolSci professor asked if I’d volunteer for the then-senatorial candidate’s campaign when she came to campus. I agreed. I was neither for or against Clinton at that point, just helping out a teacher I got along with. We were supposed to meet Hilary at the end of the event. We only met her assistant, who was an absolute dickhole to we unimportant, unpaid peons. I thought it kind of sucked that Clinton couldn’t spare ten minutes to thank people who had done a lot of… Read more »
Johnny

I do blame her. I knew Bush was lying. It was completely apparent. I suspect Clinton knew too, but went along with what was a politically popular move at the time. Or maybe she didn’t know better, making her less fit for office than, well… me.

Whatever though, I don’t want to start a political argument here. Don’t worry, I won’t vote for Trump, I promise that.

Johnny
“he’s seriously considering voting for Donald Trump in November because he hates Hillary Clinton” I said the same thing for like ten seconds, but I was just having a tantrum. I swore I’d never vote for Hilary Clinton. I think she’s odious and incompetent. But here I am, ready to vote for her, for the exact same reasons your BF is voting for Trump. And I’m not voting for Sanders for the same reasons your BF won’t vote for Johnson. It’s a choice between terrible and even worse, however you see it. I don’t know. All bets are off on… Read more »
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