Humor
Pop Culture
EXCLUSIVE: The Proposed TOC of GOOP’s 2nd Forthcoming “Sex Issue”

This week, Gwyneth Paltrow launched the first ever Sex Issue on her “much-discussed” lifestyle blog, GOOP.com.  It’s been a long-time coming from the homeopathic, macrobiotic, down-to-earth gazillionaire who introduced the world to the much-needed infrared and mugwort uterine cleanse. Gwynie’s saucy issue did not disappoint, with such such sage advice as investing in a $15,000 dildo and […]

Pop Culture
Funny Sex Photos That Are Safe (Enough) for Work

  SEX is one big cosmic joke. Just consider the placement of the genitals in regards to the exit of the digestive system! Desire often turns us into pathetic, desperate, vulnerable bonobos making funny noises and weird faces, bonking heads with elbows and other often imperfect and occasionally faulty body parts. If you don’t laugh, […]

Research
12 Fascinating Facts About the Vagina (At Least 1 of Which Will Give You Nightmares)

by Emily Blackwood for YourTango   1. The word vagina comes from the Latin root meaning “sheath for a sword.” Not surprisingly, the word “gladius,” meaning “sword,” was a common term for the penis. WeHeartIt 2. In 2014, a doctor removed a potato that started sprouting vines inside patient’s vagina. The patient’s mother had told her it would prevent pregnancy. 3. It’s impossible […]

Pop Culture
Happy Spring: Fuck Like Bunnies!

March 20th: the first day of Spring! A time of chocolates, pastels, niggling urges, and adorable rabbits fucking like bunnies. As Mark Twain said, “It’s spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you’ve got it, you want – oh, you don’t quite know what it is you do want, but […]

Videos
VIDEO: An Abridged History of Modern Merkins

At the 2016 Oscars, when presenting the award for Best Makeup and Hairstyling, hair-god Jared Leto sung the stylists’ praises to all 34 million viewers: [T]hey deserve an award just for putting up with us actors, not to mention the prosthetics, the wigs, the occasional merkin. If you happen to be laughing, please explain it to the […]

Pop Culture
An Abridged History of Modern Merkin Styles

At the 2016 Oscars, when presenting the award for Best Makeup and Hairstyling, hair-god Jared Leto sung the stylists’ praises to all 34 million viewers: [T]hey deserve an award just for putting up with us actors, not to mention the prosthetics, the wigs, the occasional merkin. If you happen to be laughing, please explain it to the […]

Pop Culture
The 8 Guys You’ll Find on Tinder (And the One You Won’t)

Whether you’re brand new to Tinder or you’ve downloaded the app, used it, deleted it, and re-downloaded 100 more times, chances are you’ve come across these common straight male characters on the popular dating (read: hook-up) app: 1. The “Nice Guy” A typical Tinder description is “I’m a nice guy” or “I’ve been told I’m a […]

Toys
Fashion for Your Penis: LELO’s Tux

No joke! Okay, it’s a joke — but it’s an incredibly well-made, high quality, totally wearable, and definitely purchasable joke. We would expect nothing less from our friends at LELO, who’ve proven once again that elegance and humor are not mutually exclusive when it comes to great sex. Just in time for Valentine’s Day, they’ve […]

How To
5 Fixes for Saying the Wrong Name in Bed

Dear Em & Lo,  I like this man so much. But I called him my ex’s name when he was going down on me and I wasn’t even thinking of my ex or anything! I was with my ex for 2 years and this guy 3 months. I’m done with my ex but the new […]

Horoscopes
Your Weekly Horoscopes: Dec 14th, 2015

aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th) If your mind’s in the gutter but your ass is on the La-Z-Boy, chances are the only person you’re going to be talking dirty to is your teddy bear. If you’re looking for a more interactive experience, as it were, you’re going to have to get out of the house every […]

Sex Poetry
P-Pushkin Real Good: A Bawdy Poem from the Czar of Russian Lit

Last week, we gave you a taste of Pushkin the Romantic’s more romantic side. This week, we’re giving you a peak at his more playful side. (Stay tuned for a look at his truly trashy stuff, coming soon.) The following is Pushkin’s early-1800s “Advancing from the Rear”, translated by A.Z. Foreman from his blog Poems Found […]

Pop Culture
Turkey Porn: Hot, Naked Birds

Aw, yeah. It’s that time of year again, when the dirty birds come out to play and anything’s possible: a full-body basting, a good stuffing up to the elbow, even succulent vegan experimenting! You know you want it. So dig in! #168642243 / gettyimages.com   #107239948 / gettyimages.com   #143038720 / gettyimages.com   #171295707 / […]

Say Amything
The Addictiveness of Reproduction

The following is the FINAL installment (#14) of the hilarious series by author and squirrel hunter Amy Bronwen Zemser called “How to Thaw Your Unborn Child.” Give yourself a treat and start at the beginning here. Or jump in below: all you need to know is that after divorcing her husband and having a tumultuous gay love affair, Amy eventually fell in love with Lynn, got married, and had three children with her […]

Say Amything
How to Convince Your New Partner to Have a Baby with You Right Away 

The following is the second to last installment (#13) of the hilarious series by author and squirrel hunter Amy Bronwen Zemser called “How to Thaw Your Unborn Child.” Give yourself a treat and start at the beginning here. Or jump in below: all you need to know is that after divorcing her husband and having a tumultuous gay love affair, Amy started dating Lynn…  When Lynn and I first got together, we had […]

How To
How to Have Sex with a Vampire

1. Get your blood work done beforehand and make sure you bring condoms: while the undead can’t give you any STDs, infections you might have (especially blood-borne infections) can make for an unpleasant experience for your vampire.* 2. Don’t eat any garlic for at least 72 hours beforehand. 3. Don’t give blood for at least […]

How To
How These 8 Preschool Skills Can Improve Your Love Life

A recent article in the Times explained why the social and sharing skills that you learn in preschool help you succeed in the workplace — and probably more so than any of the test-taking skills you learn later on in your school life. Reading that piece, we realized that the exact same thing could be […]