Kinky
How To
A Spanking Fetish Without the Cliche Emotional Baggage

photo via flickr We don’t often read the “Modern Love” column in the New York Times Sunday Styles section these days — when you’ve been in the biz as long as we have, it’s easy to get cynical and feel like you’ve heard every story about love and sex there is to tell. But  this […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week: Love Can’t Conquer Kinky Differences

Reader Xena said the following in response to our post “He’s Kinky, She’s Vanilla — Is the Relationship Doomed?” The LESS likely scenario is that the vanilla partner will have bsdm needs awoken in them with time. But I would not bet on that scenario. The other very important thing to note is that even […]

Toys
50 Shades of Play: A Guide to the Toys in “Fifty Shades of Grey”

Say what you will about the literary merit of E.L. James’s Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, but you can’t deny the sexual curiosity they’ve ignited, the sexual knowledge they’ve imparted and the sexual delight they’ve given, where most readers are concerned. The result has been a boon for the sex toy industry, thanks to all […]

Dear Em & Lo
Your Call: We Got Kinky Then She Dumped Me – Now What?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below. Dear Em & Lo, I had […]

How To
5 Ways to Keep Sex Fresh and New — No, Seriously

photo by John Brawley If you want to feel like it’s the very first time, then it’s important to keep sex surprising and try new things regularly. You can’t get lazy. So give the following steps a try every now and then. You might feel silly being “experimental,” but the occasional awkward moment is a […]

How To
The 10 Rules of Wrist Restraint

Lelo cuffs Today we are going to talk about “sensual bondage.” This is a kinder, gentler BDSM that just focuses on the simple wrist restraint of a partner who gives you their permission to do so first. Anything more complicated and you’ll need to school yourself thoroughly in the safety aspects of bondage, either with […]

How To
Headphones: A New Twist on Sensory Deprivation

photo by SS.ma You know the basic idea of sensory deprivation, right? You limit one or more senses, and the others gets stronger. Limit everything but touch, and your orgasm will feel like the center of the universe. You may have done this without even knowing you were enjoying sensory deprivation — when you blindfold […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: My Wife Asked Me to Slap Her

photo by Mickey Sick Dear Em & Lo, My wife and I have been together just over five years. The other night while having sex, she asked me to slap her in the face. Repeatedly. I was raised not to lay a hand down on a woman, and now I am being asked to. We […]

How To
Top 10 Items to Pack for Summer Vacation (We’re Not Talking Sunscreen)

Don’t waste precious suitcase space on sunscreen this summer vacation—you can buy that when you arrive. But here are 10 items that you probably won’t be able to find at the resort, so pack them for guaranteed high temperatures, no matter what the weather is like. You might want to put them in your checked […]

Confessions
Comments of the Week: Friendship vs. Sex in LTRs

photo by prakhar The following two comments were in response to “Your Call: He’s Kinky, She’s Vanilla — Is the Relationship Doomed?” It’s Doomed, Says Amanda: I have a guy friend in this situation. He is kinky, she is not. His experience makes me think you are probably a bit doomed. I asked him as a […]

Dear Em & Lo
Your Call: He’s Kinky, She’s Vanilla, Is the Relationship Doomed?

Share your advice for this reader in the comments section below… Dear Em & Lo, I recently started dating a wonderful man. He’s smart, and interesting, and handsome and the sex has been delightful. But not outstanding. But we’ve been working a fairly brisk learning curve and we can’t seem to get enough of each […]

How To
8 Suggestions for Making a Sex Tape

photo by sskennel Thinking of playing a little very candid camera with your other half? Engaging in your own sexual shoot, whether as the star or the director or both, can automatically make things more dramatic and theatrical, even if you end up keeping most of your clothes on or refuse to make any cliched “orgasm faces.” But, […]

Polls
Poll: Do You Use Vibes with Your Partner?

What’s your opinion on using battery-operated sex toys with a partner?online surveys Can’t see the poll? Click here to take it.

How To
How to Turn Your Headphones Into a Bedside Accessory

photo by carolyn.will You know the basic idea of sensory deprivation, right? You limit one or more senses, and the others get stronger. Limit everything but touch, and your orgasm will feel like the center of the universe. You may have done this without even knowing you were practicing sensory deprivation — with a blindfold, […]

Your Call
Your Call on Spank Tuesday: How Do I Get My Guy to Spank Me?

photo via Rachel_Kramer_Bussel “Spank Tuesday” continues with this question from a reader: Dear Em & Lo, How do I ask my husband to spank me? It is many years since I was spanked. Do I just ask him or buy a paddle as a Valentine’s gift or what? — Red-Cheeked Wannabe What should Red-Cheeked Wannabe […]

How To
How to Share a Fantasy in 3 Easy(ish) Steps

Sharing a fantasy with a partner can be a cheap and easy way to foster intimacy, build trust, and kink things up. But it takes a lot of courage to do. What if you think yours is too mundane to put into words (remember Meg Ryan’s faceless stranger fantasy in When Harry Met Sally?). Or […]