In addition to being a cheerleader for lube, our contributor Jewely Hoxie also studies Human Sexuality at the University of California Santa Cruz (read her blog here):
One of my favorite movie quotes of all time is from My Big Fat Greek Wedding: “My dad believed in two things: That Greeks should educate non-Greeks about being Greek, and every ailment from psoriasis to poison ivy can be cured with Windex.” This is because it kind of sums up how I feel about lubrication when it comes to sex: Lube makes it all better. And as almost any lube enthusiast will tell you, too much lube is almost enough.
1. Lube prevents cuts and pain
Lubrication is the first step in relieving pain from sex. The first time someone told me to use lubricant was when I was getting a check-up at Planned Parenthood. I had some abrasions from the night before, so they tossed me a bag full of lubricant samples. I never looked back.
2. Lube wards off over-sensitivity
Both men and women can suffer from over-sensitivity during manual sex — what was feeling awesome one minute can feel like rug burn the next minute. Lube can help you enjoy longer and more varied stimulation, which can be especially helpful for a woman’s orgasm.
3. Lube enhances sensations
I mean this in two ways: The first being actual pleasure-enhancing lubricants. Lubes that warm upon touch or cause a tingly sensation can be fun to experiment with, but remember to communicate with your partner, because some people can experience more pain (and I don’t mean good pain) than pleasure from these kind of lubes. The second way lube can enhance sensation is taste: Flavored lubricant can be a nice perk for those who prefer the scent of, say, strawberry-banana to their partner’s genitals. Just know that a lot of flavored or otherwise gimmicky lubricants contain glycerin, which can be irritating to sensitive vaginas, so be sure to reading the packaging first.
4. Lube provides variety
Water-based, silicone, warming, cooling, flavored, etc. — there’s a whole variety of lubricants to try. Each one can physically change your sexual experience. Get more adventurous.
5. Lube gives you rhythm
Any kind of penetration can be difficult when you or your partner are experiencing dryness. Silky smooth penetration makes it easier for the penetrator to keep up an even rhythm and to be able to control when to slow down and speed up. A smooth entry means you can try different positions more easily, too.
6. Spit is not enough
When getting hot and heavy, it’s common to get dehydrated, so the go-to oral sex spitting technique is not necessarily at the plenty (nor may it be the exact vibe you’re going for!). Lube offers a gliding, moisturizing feeling that can reduce the discomfort of friction. Lubricant is quite the helping hand during oral sex, especially on a man. I hate to use Sex and the City for sex ed, but Samantha’s blowjob quotation explains it well: “Teeth placement and jaw stress and suction and gag reflex. And all the while bobbing up and down, moaning, and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy? Honey, they don’t call it a ‘job’ for nothing.” (And this from a woman who actually enjoyed going down!) Basically, lubricant makes the “job” a little easier for the giver as well as more pleasurable for the receiver.
Coming next week: My Top 6 Favorite Lubricants
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