Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: Do guys ever turn down casual sex? To ask the guys your own question, click here.
Straight Married Guy (Jamie): My own experience with casual sex is a bit limited. I was always a “girlfriend guy” and it was only between relationships that I occasionally had the chance to get freaky with someone I wasn’t dating. I’m sure there are plenty of reasons why a guy might choose to go home to his Xbox over a no-strings-attached BJ, but in my case it was almost always because the girl was way too drunk. Call me old-fashioned, but there’s just nothing sexy to me about that slack-jawed, half-lidded stare from some girl in a bar who spills most of her drink wobbling over to you to invite you home. The couple of times I did go home with someone who was far less than sober, the sex was always overly urgent and awkward and (shocker!) I usually regretted it.
Straight Single Guy (Chris): Yes guys do, contrary to popular belief, turn down casual sex on occasion. The number one reason given, “That bitch was crazy!” It’s really simple. Guys love casual sex when it is actually casual. If the chances of the girl going sideways and stalking, calling every day thereafter, or crying hysterically is too high, the risk to reward ratio is simply not good enough to take the chance. In all likelihood, any guy who is trolling for casual sex has a handful of booty-call numbers in his phone anyway, and isn’t scared to use them.
Gay Married Guy (Jon Ross): Gay guys turning down casual sex is like Tara Reid turning down a drink, but it does happen from time to time. The reasons can include just about anything from “I’m too drunk” to “you’re too ugly,” to “I’m going shopping with my mom,” but I find the most common reason guys turn down casual sex is because they’re in or starting a more serious relationship. And straight guys? I don’t think they’re any different from gay guys in this respect (except for, perhaps, the shopping thing). To a lesser extent, guys abstain from doing it no-strings to avoid passing on any temporary if nasty bugs. Gotta be clean!
Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross and our Straight Single Guy is Chris DiClerico. To ask the guys your own question, click here.