Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: “My guy says getting a BJ is one of the best feeling things I can do for him, but it still takes forever to get him off. That seems like a total paradox….?“
Straight Single Guy (Chris): That may be exactly why he likes it so much. I would argue that guys that are worried about finishing too quickly during sex are worried mainly because your pleasure is directly tied to his. The idea of getting a blowjob where he’s not worried about how long it takes is insanely pleasurable, relaxing, and occasionally mindblowing. When oral sex is done correctly, a woman can bring a man close to the edge and back off several times before allowing him to finish. All of this adds up to incredible enjoyment for him, but none of it means that the actual sensation on the penis is more intense than intercourse. In many cases it is a much more controlled and gentle experience. Then again, I’ve known a lady or two who can sort me out before the first commercial is over. Remember, you’re in control (I’ve been told this is the best part for the woman) and, with practice, you can create an experience as long and drawn out, or short and intense as you like.
Straight Committed Guy (Johnny): In my experience, that’s not a paradox. Almost any woman can make a BJ feel good, but only some have finishing skills. Combine that with my natural marathon-man stamina (circumcision-induced lack of sensitivity? Topic for other threads on this site…), and it’s just not that easy to make me come from BJ’s. But I always love them. Almost. Unless she’s got a crappy attitude about it, or there’s teeth. Ask your dude if there’s any particular technique that’d work for him. And gauge his overall sexual reaction to you — does he love having sex with you, and usually climax? Yes? Then don’t get hung up on the BJ thing. Focus on your strengths.
Gay Single Guy (Angelo Nikolopoulos): A guy who enjoys a long BJ and takes forever to get off is as much a paradox as helping yourself to seconds and thirds and fourths at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Unless there’s a pesky time limit hovering over you like a gnat, why rush a good thing? Perhaps the question’s not whether your guy enjoys getting his knob slobbed on but whether you, ants-in-your-pants Patsy, enjoy doing the slobbing. In this case, you should do nothing by halves. Practice a two groins, one stone approach instead, where you can both test your limits of endurance and nimbleness, like two athletes elbow-braced and racing toward one gloriously sweaty end.