Wise Guys: What Do Men Think of Cougars?

cougarphoto by Harlequeen

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “What do men in general think about cougars?”

Gay Single Guy (Jay Dyckman):

“I am Cougar, hear me roar,
In years too big to ignore…”

If it isn’t already, this should be the anthem for the beloved cougar.  Prowl on, ladies! Honestly, what’s the big deal?  OK, so maybe it is a sexual desire fueled largely out of a denial that one is rapidly aging off this mortal coil. We’re all headed there anyway, aren’t we?  Why not grab a little nubile ass on the way out? What the cougar phenomenon tells us is that (1) we like coming up with weird monikers for sexually-active women (see MILF); and (2) this country still has a problem with casual sex as it relates to women.

Straight Single Guy (Tyler Barnett): The cougar is a bit of an anomaly to me. On the one hand, cougars have experience, confidence and generally pleasing physical attributes, all of which are very attractive characteristics. On the flip side, they can be difficult to please and tend to try too hard. Personally, I find confidence attractive, but a truly attractive woman doesn’t have to try so hard to be sexy. So cougars aren’t generally my thing. But every now and again I’ll run into that mature woman who looks me in the eyes like she’s ready to pounce…and I hope she does. I think the trick to the sexy cougar is subtlety. If you can pull off a look 20 years below your age without appearing like it took you 20 years in the mirror to accomplish, you have  mastered cougar purrfection. Grrr baby, very grrr.

Straight Married Guy (Jim): It seems like a largely positive stereotype and I’m all for it.  However, the importance of not dressing like you just chalked your first ID can not be overstated.  That makes me sad.

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Jim from New York, our Gay Guy is Jay Dyckman, an LA copywriter, and our Single Straight Guy is Tyler Barnett, owner of the LA PR firm Barnett Ellman. To ask the guys your own question, click here.

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24 Comments on "Wise Guys: What Do Men Think of Cougars?"

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As long as they pray on single younger men I guess its alright, although I still find it creepy…just like I find men praying on much younger women creepy. I just don’t understand how a woman can be attracted to a boy who can practically be her son…or a man dating a woman who can be her daughter. I think one of the possible main reasons is to be in control. Being more experienced gives them the edge to run things…and they feed their egos with that power and their lust with younger meat. It’s easy. I love being with… Read more »

Yeah, I love the sweating, nervous males at the “watering hole”…!

Madamoiselle L

Hilarious, ss. I didn’t get all the references, like the stores and locations, (I’m not from NZ) but the “documentary” was really funny.



Copy and paste, you know the drill…

Worthwhile YouTube documentary on the issue of “cougars…” 😉

Madamoiselle L
I don’t particularly like the term “Cougar.” I’m a little older than some of the posters here, but My Man is older than I am, so I am not Cougar material. But, I have NO problem with a mature woman dating a younger man, if they are both interested in each other. I also have no problem with an older man dating a younger women, if they are both interested in each other. Saying someone who gets “paid in pleasure” from sex is a “prostitute” is silly. Judy, YOU don’t get pleasure from sex? Most people do. That doesn’t make… Read more »

Oh! Genius, if ironic, suggestion from Kym! Sexually successful older men should be called bald eagles.


Cougars, bald eagles… these are POWER animals. Why did anyone decide that these terms are denigrating? Particularly when your alternatives are “desperate old lady” and “perv”. Come on! Lighten up!

@ Judy: Younger guys, sexually attracted to you? How DARE they, right? Trying to give you pleasure as “payment,” and making a “prostitute” of you. Screw that! Gross! Some women have the self-respect to grow old alone and free from the yoke of sexual attraction. And they’re the ones who are RIGHT. In case you can’t tell I’m being sarcastic. @ Frank: It all evens out Frank. “Perv” is what we call SEXUALLY UNSUCCESSFUL older guys – guys who go around creeping younger women out. We have names for sexually unsuccessful people of all ages and genders. A sexually unsuccessful… Read more »