Your Call: Can You Fall in Love Through Video Chats?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below. 

Dear Em & Lo,

I met a great man through an online dating service. We haven’t met, but he wants me to be his girlfriend. He is in Europe and is returning for a business trip in October. Is it possible for a man to fall in love or be infatuated with a woman through video chats?  Does that even happen anymore?

— Virtual Girlfriend

What should V.G. do? Let her know in the comments below…


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9 Comments on "Your Call: Can You Fall in Love Through Video Chats?"

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For Demisexuals such as I, it’s very likely. I’ve fallen in love with three different people. Dated two(one current). For Demis it’s about the emotional connection you get from getting to know someone. Knowing this, yeah even for the other sexualities apart from asexuality. It’d be easy if you’re not shallow.

My husband and I certainly went a long way down the road to love through video chats for about 8 months before we could meet in person. I certainly wouldn’t want to make any commitments before you actually meet in person- no matter how honest you are with each other, you learn things in person that you just can’t find out online. How they smell, whether they do actually pick up their socks, how physically comfortable you are with each other, how you interact with each other’s friends/families etc. There’s a lot about having an online relationship that’s a bit… Read more »
I met a woman online who lives 8,000 miles from me. We talk approx 3 to 4 hours each day for the past 3 years. We have been exclusive from very early on in our relationship based on our conversations. I believe that we have talked to each other more than some husbands and wives have talked their entire marriage. We met in person 3 months ago and all went well in person and I proposed to her and she accepted. We are very happy with our arrangement till her divorce and visa are completed and look forward to the… Read more »
Promised B
I met someone who lives also thousands of miles away..i have video called and spent hours talking to him..he is smart,funny,caring,very humble i am certainly crazy for him, first physically he is my type 100 percent, second inside he is amazing from the abundance of the heart men speak so he is full of love..third ..yes i have lust for him but i am mostly IN LOVE with him because i cannot stop thinking about him..i will drop everything just to talk to him and listen to his voice..and i have never felt same for ANY man i have ever… Read more »
DJ Osiris
It’s very easy to become infatuated with someone through video chats, but to actually fall in love with someone you have yet to meet who lives thousands of miles away??? I don’t know about that. In heated chats some people will say just about anything and that feeling of lust is very powerful, but at the end of the chat, you have to look at it for what it is and seriously ask yourself this question– Is it love or lust? You have to be weary. Developing a strong relationship takes a lot of time and effort in most cases… Read more »

Basically, what I see here, is a situation where you two are agreeing to not see other people and put yourselves on hold until October. If you are both content not dating other people, then I think it is perfectly fine for you to be exclusive until you have the chance to meet in real life. BUT, if I were you, I wouldn’t consider this “love” or a serious relationship until you see what kind of real life dynamic you guys have. In other words, don’t get to invested.

Of course it’s possible! It’s entirely plausible that you are two people who have been lucky enough to meet each other, get along marvellously and couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Of course it’s also entirely plausible that he’s a bit lonely in Europe and is diving in perhaps a little too deeply with the first person he’s clicked with online, despite that fact he’s never actually physically met you, because of this. Personally, I certainly wouldn’t have him call me his girlfriend if I were you. That smacks a little of some desperate attempt to make him ‘yours’ even… Read more »

Fall in lust, yes.
Fall in love, no.
To fall in love, you need a full experience with someone. Being around them, knowing them, compromising, realizing that with love comes being there for your partner during the good and the bad.
You are in the infatuation/lust stage. It feels great, but its not very deep.