11/16/11
Your Call: Why Do Men Cheat Down?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your response in the comments section below.

Why do guys cheat down? Meaning, picking a woman less attractive. My husband cheated on me with a woman twice my size. He said he found her unattractive but couldn’t help himself. Another friend of mine (she is a model) had her husband cheat on her. It was while he was out of town and all the women were less attractive. Of course these are just two examples. I was always under the impression that if you are going to cheat, at least make it worth it.

What do you think? Do you agree that men “cheat down”? Why or why not?

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49 Comments on "Your Call: Why Do Men Cheat Down?"

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Kristi
I’m an attractive woman… always have been. I’ve always been in shape, never “let myself go” (even after 3 kids), I’m 38, but often, regularly mistaken for much younger. I’m what most would call “beautiful” “youthful” and I don’t consider myself the typical married with kids housewife. I like sex, I enjoy it. My husband and I have sex very, very regularly and always have (we’ve been together 6 years, married almost 4) and yet he cheated. (We had sex 2 days before he cheated) and nonetheless, with some ratchet looking “Tuesday night special” (I say that because it happened… Read more »
GIA

Becausen he’s plain it lost respect for you. What you look like is irrelevant

Chad
I’m currently in a relationship and fantasizing about other women. My girlfriend is beautiful, easily the most attractive girl I’ve ever dated. The reason I found this article is because I wanted to know why I was fantasizing about other, uglier women. Why did I have a desire to cheat down? I can’t fully answer the question but I can tell you it’s purely sexual for me. One comment I read was that you could just use and abuse the other for sex with no commitment. This is true and part of why cheating sounds tempting. It’s the freedom to… Read more »
Denise
I think it goes definitely beyond sex. Some men are stronger than others when it comes to temptation. Maybe the reality is that if a wife/s.o. becomes emotionally unavailable, or a nag! and another (less pretty, sophisticated or smart) woman REALLY listens to him, praises him, makes him feel good about himself…he becomes interested, even obsessed with her. This new, less than beautiful (even homely) creature makes him feel good about himself. She is full of admiration for him. She’s his friend who does not criticize him – and only notices his good side. She comments on his virtues and… Read more »
bobo

IT’S SIMPLE,AND MOST WILL NOT LIKE WHAT I WILL SAY…BUT YOU ALWAYS CHEAT DOWN CUS THE WOMEN ARE MORE WILLING TO BE WITH YOU WITHOUT EXPECTING MORE AND YOU ARE A CATCH TO THEM.

Layla
Just reading through the BS from some on here. Cheating down is not always only about looks (or whatever the standard of beauty is). It is about intellect, sense of humor, personality…the entire package. I was recently cheated on. The woman i was cheated on with was someone who was a complete psycho, nut job. She is stupid and ignorant on top of being physically ugly (by societies standards). The woman had nothin going on. Why? Why did he do it I asked? Why with her? The answer was that he knew he couldn’t continue a relationship with her because… Read more »
Shelly

Lol I take it you are not attractive lol

Unknown
Well im a plus size young woman who has many options but was intrigued by a nice looking military man. I met himand he chased me for MONTHS no dating just texts n calls here n there. Im a busy single woman with no kids. So i have a life but he checked on me and every other day asking about meeting me again. I gave him his chance and we dated for months he was at my home almost everyday then one day I decide to get on my fb acct. And look for his name so we can… Read more »
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