Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. If you’ve got a good one, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg just might tell you what it means! Click here to submit yours (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:
I really need some understanding about this dream I had. I couldn’t go back to sleep because I wanted to know what it meant so bad.
My boyfriend and I recently had a baby girl in November of 2015. We fight all the time for various reasons, but now it’s been getting physical. Yesterday we had a big fight because someone called my phone late at night and he didn’t like it; it got outta control and I kicked him.
Later that night I had a dream that he was on the phone with some girl who said he had gotten her pregnant in November (she was also having a girl). She said he has an extra key to her apartment and that he showed up there. We fought. I took all the money out his pockets and left crying, hurt, and then I just woke up!
Please tell me, what does this mean? I’m feeling like I don’t care after the fight, but it did bother me.
Lauri: Please do not kick your boyfriend and father of your child. No matter how rotten and selfish you think he is being, resorting to violence only makes a bad situation exponentially worse. Remember, you are also showing your daughter that hitting and kicking is an acceptable way to communicate. The same goes for your boyfriend.
Okay, now that I am off my soapbox, let’s figure out this dream. Other than the dream, do you have a reason to suspect he may be cheating? Even if you do, I think the dream goes even deeper than that. The dream starts out where he is on the phone. That tells us right away that this dream is commenting on the communication between the two of you. He is talking to a girl that he got pregnant in November… when YOUR baby was born. That tells us that this girl represents your relationship and the pregnancy symbolizes how the relationship has grown and developed since the birth of your real child. The extra key means he has an additional way to open up and connect with you now that you have a child BUT you guys fight in the dream because you fight in real life. You also take all his money which indicates an imbalance in the emotional and psychological value you have in the relationship. There is no sharing… only taking.
I want you to reflect on this very deeply: Do you feel you have to force him to place value on your relationship and child, or are you the one not seeing his value? Dreams give us the opportunity to look at our current issues from a different and fresher and HONEST perspective. Perhaps you two can discuss this together, like adults, WITHOUT VIOLENCE, and come to a point where you can better understand the other’s point of view… again without violence please.