How To
When Anger Is Helpful in a Relationship…And When It’s Not

Count to ten before you speak, we’re often told, especially when fighting with a partner. Take a deep breath and remember you’re talking to someone you love, the advice goes. Being angry means you’ve lost control, the theory goes. But is there ever a time when you shouldn’t count to ten — when a little anger […]

How To
How NOT to Spice Up Your Relationship

We’ve been in the magazine business for more than fifteen years, and we are still suckers for those stupid headlines like “537 Ways to Improve Your Sex Life TONIGHT!” We just can’t help flipping to that article while we’re stuck in the check-out line. What if just one of those “guaranteed” 537 tips is neither ridiculous […]

How To
How to Combat the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse… in Bed

You’ve probably heard of “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse” — these are the four types of behavior that, when they occur on a regular basis in a relationship, are a good predictor of divorce, according to psychology professor and bestselling author John Gottman, Ph.D. According to the Gottman Relationship Blog, “The Four Horsemen typically […]

How To
5 Ways to Show Your Appreciation to Your Partner

Last week we published an article by YourTango explaining how to resuscitate your relationship after a bout of infidelity. The solution? You have to truly — and verbally — appreciate your partner. Like, a lot. But why wait for an affair to do this? In fact, appreciating your partner on a daily basis is a […]

How To
10 Things to Say to Your Partner Instead of “I Love You”

Saying “I love you” can become a form of punctuation in a long-term relationship. People say it at the end of a phone call, or on their way out the door, or as they’re falling asleep at night. And there’s nothing wrong with this. Expressing love often is a good thing! And it’s a nice way to check […]

Wise Guys
Men Are Not Hardwired for Cheating — Just for Sex

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week we ask, “Are men hardwired to cheat? More than women?“ Straight Married Guy (Ben): When it comes to sex, sexuality and attraction, men ARE hardwired for many things. We are hardwired to notice — men, women, whatever your sexual preference. We are hardwired to assess — […]

Pop Culture
5 Reasons Why You Should Read “I Take You” by Eliza Kennedy

Have you met Lily Wilder? You should. She’s the seriously funny, seriously sex-driven, and seriously flawed protagonist of the novel I Take You by Eliza Kennedy, which is on sale starting today. Here are five reasons why you should pick up a copy right now… 1. I Take You is a straightforward look at female […]

How To
Why Marriage Vows Should Include Sex

photo via flickr Traditional marriage vows cover better… and worse; sickness… and health; riches…. and poverty; forsaking all others… but not its opposite. What is the opposite of forsaking all others, anyway? Well, if forsaking all others is about the absence of sex (with other people), then its opposite, in our opinion, is the presence […]

Pop Culture
An Open Marriage Can’t Fix Something That’s Already Broken

A new memoir called The Wild Oats Project: One Woman’s Midlife Quest for Passion At Any Cost is giving a lot of committed monogamists the chance to say “I told you so!” about open marriage. Here’s the book in a nutshell: San Francisco-based magazine editor Robin Rinaldi felt like her marriage was in a rut, […]

How To
10 Questions to Ask Each Other Before Getting Married

We’re not talking here about the kinds of questions everyone should ask each other before deciding to get married — things that could be actual deal-breakers, like, Do you want kids? And, Are you a member of the Republican party? No, these ten questions are things you should ask each other in order to have […]