Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo
Terrified of Going to the Gyno? 8 Ways to Relax Enough to Make Your Appointment

Hey Em and Lo, I know how important it is to see a gyno, but honestly, I am terrified to go.  I’ve actually made several appointments since I lost my virginity about nine months ago, but every time the date approaches, I find myself canceling last minute.  I’ve tried positive thinking, ignoring thoughts of the […]

Dear Em & Lo
Should I Be Concerned About My Rape Fantasies?

Dear Em & Lo, I’m writing to ask you about your opinion of rape fantasies. I’ve been in a serious and loving relationship with my boyfriend for almost four years now. It’s a very egalitarian, loving, supportive and comfortable relationship. Yet both my boyfriend and I immensely enjoy acting out rape fantasies. We enjoy having […]

Dear Em & Lo
Help! I Can’t Orgasm with My Boyfriend

Dear Em & Lo, I’m a woman and have been dating my boyfriend for five months and we have a great relationship…well, almost great. When we have sex, I have a hard time crossing the finish line. We’ve tried many positions and everything feels great. I just can’t orgasm with my boyfriend. It’s at the point […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo, Is “Cunt” an Appropriate Word for Dirty Talk?

Dear Em & Lo, Hello there. This morning for the first time, my new boyfriend and I fucked. It was going okay until he came out with the word “cunt.”  I froze. Maybe it’s just me, but, I always blush at this word. Now, he wants me to use it when, or rather if, we […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: Were We Ever Really in Love?

Dear Em & Lo, Four months ago my girlfriend of three years ended our relationship. She gave me generic reasons: “It’s not you, it’s me; we’re too young for such a serious relationship; we have a lot to experience.” Finally this week I got her to drop her guard and open up to me. Her […]

Dear Em & Lo
My New Boyfriend Has a Small Penis…At Least, It’s Small to Me

Dear Em & Lo, About six months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 18 months and have recently met someone new. The other day the new boy and I were engaging in some hands-on action which led me to discover that he nowhere near measured up to my ex. The new boy was […]

Dear Em & Lo
My Boyfriend Masturbates to Facebook Friends — Is That Normal?

Dear Em & Lo, My ex and I were in a relationship for just over 2 years. We broke up recently as he preferred to masturbate to his friends Facebook photos than have sex with me. I had known about it all throughout the relationship and tried to get him to stop. It really killed […]

Dear Em & Lo
10 Ways to Increase Your Chances of Female Orgasm WITH a Partner

One of the most common questions we receive from heterosexual women is, “How can I orgasm in bed with my partner?” The really demanding ones want to know how to orgasm simultaneously, during penetration, every time. If this is you, then sorry, you’re out of luck; if we knew the answer to that question, we’d […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo, Can I Get Trichomoniasis From Masturbation?

Dear Em & Lo, If I masturbate 3 times a day 7 days a week and haven’t had a real sex partner in over a year, can I get trichomoniasis? — Red Handed Dear RH, Trichomoniasis is a sexually transmitted infection caused by a protozoan parasite called Trichomonas vaginalis, most commonly passed from genitals to genitals. […]

Dear Em & Lo
10 Reasons Your “Ugly Vagina” Is Normal and Gorgeous

There’s no such thing as an “ugly vagina.” Here’s why… Dear Em & Lo, A male acquaintance recently started a conversation about “ugly” vaginas with my friends and me. He said that some vaginas resemble “kebabs” and that a lot of guys are really put off sex when they get a hot girl naked and […]

Dear Em & Lo
My Ex Is Over Me, But I’m Not Over My Ex — Help!

Dear Em and Lo, My ex boyfriend and I were together for a little over 4 years (I’m in my 20s). For the first three years I loved him so much. I put in so much effort. He was the most beautiful, funny and wonderful man. But then things got a little rocky. I felt […]

Dear Em & Lo
My Husband, a Selfish Lover, Won’t Even Try to Give Me an Orgasm

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. This time, a woman finds herself married to a selfish lover. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below.  […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo, How Can I Get Back at My Boyfriend for Dumping Me So Cruelly?

Dear Em & Lo, I thought my boyfriend and I had a good relationship: we lived together, I took care of him, I took care of everything.  He said no one took care of him like I did, even though he’d had plenty of women before me. I thought we were happy. But he found […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo, What Books Are a Good Intro to Open Relationships?

Dear Em & Lo, I would like to find literature that I can give to my wife,  on encouraging her to pursue non-monogamous relationships, as this could be good for our relationship. We are a mature couple and I think she and we could benefit from this. Thanks kindly, Open-Minded Dear O.M., First, are you […]