The following advice has been updated: Get yourself a therapist. If you do nothing else, do this. You’ve got some issues that you need to work through — trying to resolve them on internet forums won’t work. If you’re insurance covers therapy, then you’ve got no excuse — carve out the time and commit to this. […]
I’m a teenager who was kinda pressured to give a guy oral (he’s my age) and though it was only for 3 minutes tops, I don’t know anything about his medical history except that he has had sex before. I myself had never done that before, nor have I had sex (I am a virgin) and didn’t even […]
Dr. Kate is an OB/GYN at one of the largest teaching hospitals in Boston who lectures nationally on women’s health issues and conducts research on reproductive health. She regularly (and generously!) answers your health questions here on EMandLO.com. To ask her your own, click here. Dear Dr. Kate, About 2 months ago my boyfriend and I had sex for the first […]
Hey Em & Lo! I’m in a tricky situation and don’t know where to look. I’ve been dating this guy for about a month and found out that he’s a virgin. I’m not. By far. I’m looking for tips and tricks on how to train him and introduce him to this in a good way […]
Update the language, and John Donne’s “To His Mistress Going to Bed” could be an R&B sex song on the radio today. All about trying to get his lady buck nekkid, this late 16th/early 17th-century British elegy employs hilarious metaphors and euphemisms for body parts and bodily functions (e.g. his soldier is tired of standing, […]
We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call on the letter below by leaving your advice in the comments section. I am a 26-year old black female who […]
You’re a straight guy who’s had intercourse. You’re dating a woman who hasn’t. But it’s looking like you’ll be her first. Here’s how to do it right in 19 key steps: Engage in lots of foreplay. This is not the time for 2 minutes of kissing followed by 1 minute of boob grabbing before you get […]
We often get advice questions from virgins (usually straight and female) asking how long they can make a guy wait, if it’s realistic to hold out for the right person, and whether or not there are straight non-virgin guys out there who are willing to wait. To them, we offer these 10 inquisitive ruminations on virginity […]
The new web series from director Michael Sasso called “Swipe Click Bang” is about the mating habits of Millennials in the age of Tinder. Each webisode focuses on one couple who’ve just met through a hookup app and are either about to do it, are doing it, and/or just did it. According to Sasso, the […]
photo via WeHeartIt Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri: I’ve been having the same recurring […]
“How To Lose Your Virginity” Trailer from Trixie Films on Vimeo. Two years ago, we asked you to give some Kickstarter lovin’ to the fledgling documentary, “How to Lose Your Virginity”, being made by Theresa Shecter and the gals at Trixie Films. You must have come through, because it’s now a full-length doc, all growed up! The […]
Dear Em & Lo, It’s recently come to my attention that women can have orgasms while asleep, similarly to how men can have wet dreams. I was wondering: is it possible to have them before you’ve had an orgasm? As a 19-year old, I sometimes get turned on, but don’t do anything about it for fear of […]
In Kate Monro’s new book, “Losing It: How We Popped Our Cherry Over the Past 80 Years,” she picks up where Nancy Friday left off, letting a wide range of people tell their stories of how they lost their virginity, smartly bookending each with historical and cultural context. It’s a fascinating book that shows, to […]
Author Kate Monro has managed to make us jealous of her job: searching the world for first-time tales that don’t often get told. In her new book, “Losing It: How We Popped Our Cherry Over the Past 80 Years,” she picks up where Nancy Friday left off, letting a wide range of people — from a 90-year-old […]
Reader Jane said the following in response to our post, “Your Call: What’s the Best Way to Tell a Guy I’m a Virgin?” If a girl is a virgin at a certain age, 20, 25, 30 etc… and she is with a guy, in a new relationship, and WANTS to have sex with him… why […]
photo by Balakov Hey Em & Lo, I’m currently 26 and, yep, a virgin. I haven’t been “saving myself” and have no reason for this phenomenon other than I’ve never had the opportunity! (I had low self-esteem in high school, I was involved with theatre in college and all my crushes were gay in college, […]