While we were thrilled our latest book 150 SHADES OF PLAY: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink won the silver medal in the sex & relationships category at the Independent Publishers Book Awards this year, we’ll admit we were a little disappointed it wasn’t the gold. That honor went to Mark A. Michaels and Patricia Johnson for their Great Sex Made Simple: Tantric Tips to Deepen Intimacy & Heighten Pleasure. To prove to ourselves that we’re not sore losers (damn you, Tantra!), we asked the couple for an excerpt from their book. They kindly delivered, and now you’ll never be able to take a yoga class with a straight face again!
Become a Human Vibrator
Hummer is one term we left out during our discussion of oral sex related slang. Unlike many of the others, it doesn’t carry a negative implication. Although we haven’t been able to ascertain the origin of the term, we’d like to believe it relates to this technique and refers to a particularly effective way of performing oral sex, a way of turning your mouth into a vibrator. It seems that the term hummer is usually applied to fellatio, but it’s just as valid for cunnilingus, stimulating the clitoris and vulva with the mouth and tongue; in fact, the method we prefer is easier to practice during cunnilingus. For fellatio, intention is more important than pronunciation.
Being vocal during sex is a powerful aphrodisiac. It is also very valuable to make sounds while going down on your lover, and by making sounds, we don’t mean faking orgasmic moans. In general terms, it is best to find sounds that are a genuine expression of your enjoyment. It can be easy to be so focused on giving pleasure that you neglect what can be a powerfully erotic enhancer.
When the person giving oral sex makes humming sounds, the vibrations are transmitted directly into the body of the receiver. These vibrations influence both the receiver, who feels them in the genitals, and the giver, who feels them in the skull. This technique is in some ways similar to using a vibrator, but a human being is producing the sounds and vibrations, and that human being is intent on sharing pleasure. Thus, the effect can be considerably more subtle and complex.
These vibrations may not be as intense as mechanically generated ones, but an energetic exchange is taking place, something that can lead to a very different kind of experience. Not only is the giver focused on giving pleasure, the receiver’s response and the cues it provides through several sensory avenues create a feedback loop that will, ideally, take you both into very high states of arousal.
We have discussed chanting Om and given you a direct experience of its power in the context of exploring the sense of hearing (Part 5, Chapter 29.) Chanting this syllable during oral sex has a similar but directly sexual impact. If you are performing fellatio, you probably won’t be able (and shouldn’t try) to make the ‘O’ sound, so just focus on the ‘mmm’, while repeating the ‘O’ part of the mantra mentally.
We’d like to examine in more detail the significance of this seemingly meaningless syllable about which so much has been said and written. The symbol for Om predates writtenSanskrit, and the syllable is often referred to as the primordial sound – the vibration that emerged at the birth of the universe and that persists as the pulse of creation. Tantric sexual rituals involve reenacting this ongoing process of creation. The symbol itself is suggestive of sexual union.
The part of the symbol that resembles the number three evokes the yoni, or feminine aspect, while the curvy line that also resembles a tail, symbolizes the lingam or masculine aspect. By chanting the syllable, you are symbolically uniting your own inner masculine and feminine aspects, in addition to producing the physiological impacts we discussed in the section on hearing.
Om is actually comprised of three distinct sounds compressed into one syllable, and it is sometimes transliterated AUM (Ah – Oo – Mm). The first two sounds combine to produce the ‘O’. These three letters have profound symbolic significance. They represent past, present, and future, and thus evoke the timeless states that can be experienced during lovemaking.
They also symbolize the Hindu trinity: Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva – who represent respectively generation, operation and destruction, GOD (although we prefer to say generation, operation and transformation.) From this perspective, God need not be imagined as an anthropomorphic being but instead as the process of existence. This kind of theism strikes us as being far more sensible than believing that God is a creator who is not a part of creation. Om also symbolizes the life cycle, which is of course dependent on sexuality. At a minimum, these are useful metaphors, and even if the metaphors don’t work for you, the physiological effects of chanting the syllable are real.
Remember that, when chanting Om, you should divide it up so that the ‘O’ sound comprises the first third of the chant and the ‘mmm’ the second two thirds. We have already discussed how chanting in this manner affects the pituitary gland and resonates through the skull. We should add that it also vibrates the oral G-spot. The crescent and dot that appear above the symbol indicate the extended ‘mmm’ sound. The dot is called anuswara, which also means little heaven in Sanskrit. By chanting Om correctly, you are creating a heaven in your own cranium; chanting it during oral sex, will take both of you there.
Mark A. Michaels and Patricia Johnson are a devoted married couple who have been teaching Tantra together since 1999. Their work has been featured in Redbook, Cosmopolitan, and The Village Voice. Michaels is a graduate of NYU School of Law, a member of the Bar in New York State, and holds master’s degrees from NYU and Yale. Johnson is a professional operatic soprano, who tours throughout the US, Europe, and South America. They are the authors of Tantra for Erotic Empowerment, which was a ForeWord Book of the Year Finalist, and The Essence of Tantric Sexuality. They live in New York City. Visit them online at TantraPM.com.
