photo by chris_natt

• Angelina Jolie and Johnny Depp are the two top rated celebrities on the “sex pass” list…you know, the celebrities that your significant other supposedly gives you permission to sleep with. We’re guessing that “I have a sex pass to sleep with you” is bottom on the list of pickup lines that would work with either of them.
• Speaking of Angelina, something tells us that John Mayer is probably regretting the time he said that she was the ultimate fantasy woman. (Though we have to say, much as we love to mock the Mayer, his joke about Brad Pitt having it so, so rough because he’s got no one left to fantasize about is pretty damn funny.)
• People are shocked — shocked! — that it’s not just lesbians who find Rachel Maddow sexy. We are not shocked at all.
• 50 Cent just launched his own condom line, bless his cotton socks.
• Lady Gaga wants you to think she’s naked on the streets of Paris. Either that or she wants you to know that she’s really, really into leotards.
• Apparently in China it’s totally legal to overdub a celebrity’s image with words they never said. Which means that David Beckham, Keanu Reeves, and Sean Connery are now unwitting spokesmen for erectile dysfunction pills.
• Want to smell like a pornstar? Yeah, us neither.