Comment of the Week: Genitals Don’t Wear Out Like Sneakers

This week’s Comment of the Week was in response to the following comment on the post “Wise Guys: Do Men Care What Labia Look Like?”:

So my boyfriend of three years just informed me that my lips looked like they have been used frequently. I am not quite sure how to take this. I have been with my fair share of people in my life, but I am almost 40. And exposed to more than my fair share of abuse. I knew they were darker and longer than some photos I have seen. He did precede the statement by saying he loved my body and he didn’t want me to take it wrong, but honestly I am not sure how to take it. We live a fair distance apart because of work and children but have known each other for more than 20 years so we do send a lot of photos and videos. We see each other on weekends but I now am more self conscious and don’t know what my options are. This makes me sad and fear that he doesn’t feel the same about me.

“F” immediately responded with the following:

Denise, tell him not to take it badly, but that his cock looks like it’s been overused.

Gosh, would you believe for a second that genitals can look overused? Unless you have bruises and have just given birth, I don’t see how. And in that case, bruises or baby, he should be supporting you, not making you feel insecure about how you look. The only reason he can say that is because he KNOWS you, so he knows how many people you’ve been with, and he can’t deal with that.

I strongly suggest you back off, and find someone who actually loves you and isn’t going to invent twisted ways to insult you rather than talk to you when he’s feeling insecure. Perhaps you can remain friends with that douche, but I’d suggest [you] stay away from him.

(A good counter-example to the crap he told you is this : consider female pornstars. How can they remain popular after banging so many people if their vaginas “started looking used up”, since you mainly get close-ups of their crotchs in their films?)

Is it the most articulate argument? No. Does F stoop to name-calling? Yes. But you gotta love a reader who swoops in to lift someone up after they’ve just been knocked down.

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