Top 10 Most Overrated Sex Acts

photo by hyku

After more than a decade in the sex writing biz, we have seen our share of sexual gimmicks come and go, many of them vastly overrated. Below are the top ten sexual acts that, while they may be more substantial than gimmicks, continue to get more accolades than they deserve. Also, check out the Top 10 Most Underrated Sexual Acts — a.k.a. under-doggie-style — that we’ll feature tomorrow.

  1. Threeways. Too many elbows, too few orgasms. Also, there’s the jealousy, the insecurity, and the awkward post-coital cuddling and/or brunch. ‘Nuff said?
  2. The 69 position. Kind of like communism: great in theory, not in practice.
  3. Simultaneous orgasms. What is that saying, the great is the enemy of the good? Sure, the simultaneous O is awesome when it happens, but individual orgasms are pretty dandy, too. And sometimes, an alternating spotlight is a good idea — especially if that thing that pushes your partner over the edge requires a certain degree of concentration and/or skill.
  4. Female ejaculation & the G-spot. Somewhere along the line, this kind of female climax became valued above all others. Sure, for some women it’s the holy grail, but for others, G-spot attention is just plain annoying, or even painful.
  5. Fast-pumping intercourse. Do we really have to explain this one?
  6. Deep-throating. Because nothing says hot like a woman person throwing up a little on your penis.
  7. Sharing ALL your sexual fantasies with your partner. Some things are best saved for your me-time seshes.
  8. Text sex. There just aren’t that many nerve-endings in our thumbs.
  9. Sending naked photos. Oh, posterity. Oh, discretion. Oh, angry ex with a trigger-happy finger on the forward button.
  10. Two tongue kissing. One at a time is underrated, that’s all we’d like to say.

Honorable mention: Using flavored lube; putting on a condom with your mouth

This post is a part of Sundance Channel’s Naked Love Blog
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  1. Oh thank god, *someone* finally says g-spots can be painful. The fwb I had until recently would always go for my g-spot, conveniently forgetting each time that I nearly threw up the time before. Nothing like the sensation of being kicked hard in the groin to bring sex to a crashing standstill… His reasoning was women like having their g-spots touched and there was something “wrong” with me. 😛

  2. This article is HILARIOUS! ALL of the list is true, and the sarcastic comments just top it off. It’s usually tool bags that find 6 or more of these things the most amazing acts in the world. I’d like to think of them as warning signs… What a great read.

  3. i agree that number 3 is overrated, but it’s great when achieved every once in a while. my current partner and i have been together for a year and a half and it’s happened once. it was pretty great, but like anything else, i’m don’t think it would feel quite as special if we tried to do it all the time!
    plus, it’s no fun to be worry about the ending the whole time you’re having sex….you’ll miss all the fun!

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