Personal Essays
The Hard Work of STAYING in Love

by Emily Lingenfelser Love is saying I see you, all of you, exactly how you are — and I still choose you. Falling in love isn’t a choice; it’s an irrational chain of events that simply cannot be stopped. It can happen slowly, over time, or quickly in a matter of moments. One glance. One touch. […]

Say Amything
Why You Love Who You Love

The following is the 6th installment of a hilarious ongoing series by author and squirrel hunter Amy Bronwen Zemser called “How to Thaw Your Unborn Child.” Start at the beginning here or just jump right in below: All you need to know is that she was married to a man, realized she was gay, got divorced, fell for a woman named Moira (who dumped her after Moira had […]

Say Amything
How Do Lesbians Get Pregnant? Let Me Count the Ways

The following is the 3rd installment of a hilarious ongoing series by author and squirrel hunter (seriously) Amy Bronwen Zemser called “How to Thaw Your Unborn Child,” about sperm donation and artificial insemination when you’ve got an acute case of lesbianism. Each essay stands alone, but if you prefer, you can start with Part 1 here: There are a million ways to get pregnant.  The heterosexual model […]

Personal Essays
We Fell in Love Thanks to Rocky Horror

A few years ago, we ran an Adorable Couple Contest, in which we asked readers to tell us their meet cute stories for the chance to win an ADORE ME SET from LELO (a stylish red lipstick vibe, a red silk blindfold, red silk and suede wrist restraints, and a satin storage pouch, aw yeah). Since this week marks […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from “The Bachelorette” (Kaitlyn’s Finale)

We always get a little case of the post-Bachelor/ette blues when a season comes to an end. Over the course of 3 months, we’ve learned so much about love and lust, what to do, what not to do, who to do, who not to do… At least we have less than a week until “Bachelor […]

Your Call
I Love My Fiance and Still Think He’s Hot. So Where Did My Libido Go?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below.  Dear Em & Lo, I am a 23 year old woman and […]

Your Call
Should You Throw Away Old Love Letters?

Recently, Em sang the praises of The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, the New York Times bestseller by Japanese decluttering goddess, Marie Kondo. I didn’t think Em’s house could be any tidier, but after adopting the KonMari Method of domestic organization, it’s even more annoyingly impressive! So now I’m reading it, hoping some of this joy for […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from “The Bachelorette” (Killarney)

1. Get your hands out of your face. When you’re talking about your romantic feelings to the object of your affection, don’t constantly touch your face and cover your mouth and slur — it makes it seem like you’re hiding something…like you’re a liar and this is your tell (Nick).   2. Have some dignity when […]

How To
10 Things to Say to Your Partner Instead of “I Love You”

Saying “I love you” can become a form of punctuation in a long-term relationship. People say it at the end of a phone call, or on their way out the door, or as they’re falling asleep at night. And there’s nothing wrong with this. Expressing love often is a good thing! And it’s a nice way to check […]

Top 5 Love Lessons from “The Bachelorette” (Dublin)

  If you constantly have to talk about how smart/cool/deep you are to your date, then you are none of those things. As your 9th grade English teacher at Deerfield should have taught you: show, don’t tell.   PDA should have some limits. Yes, you’re out and about on an amazing date in a cool […]