Men vs. Women
Personal Essays
Do Men Play Hard to Get?

Rebecca Jane Stokes asked a bunch of guys, “Do men play hard to get?” Some of their answers will surprise you. When I first started dating I ached to be one of those girls who could play hard to get.  I couldn’t believe how cool and collected and seemingly not-interested the popular girls were in the […]

Pop Culture
Movie Critic Debbie Edelstein’s Review of This Summer’s New “Spider-Man”

What a critique of a summer superhero blockbuster might look like in a matriarchal world (inspired by David Edelstein’s sexist review of Wonder Woman): The only grace note in the generally clunky Spider-Man: Homecoming is its star, the five-foot-eight-inch, barely legal, English actor and dancer Tom Holland, who is the perfect blend of teenage day-dreaminess and balls. The 21-year-old […]

Personal Essays
Confession: Saying “Yes”and Finally Meaning It

KERRY NEVILLE — author of the award-winning short story collection, Necessary Lies, and the forthcoming collection, Remember To Forget Me — writes of the long road toward true consent.   Natalie and I played boyfriend and girlfriend: She was “Michael” and I was “Rebecca.”  We would walk around the block holding hands and when we reached […]

Pop Culture
Movie Review: Fifty Shades Blah-er

Fifty Shades Darker, the second movie in the trilogy based on the best-selling erotica series by E.L. James, certainly looks darker — the shadows are blacker, the skies are grayer, the rain is heavier. Every day in this movie feels like Sunday. But if you’re looking for an exploration of the more unnerving and dismaying aspects of […]

Research
What’s More Important to People: LOVE or LUST? (Survey Results)

Our friends over at LELO surveyed 1000 people from all around the world asking what was more important to them: love or lust? Here are the results! Overall, love is more important than lust for both women and men, except when they’re in open relationships: No matter people’s age, love still trumps lust, but surprisingly, […]

Comment of the Week
5 Ways to Avoid a Lifetime of Sad, Unsatisfying, Marital Sex

This comment by MEK in response to the post “My Husband Won’t Even Try to Give Me an Orgasm” is truly depressing. It’s a layered onion of bummer that makes us want to cry. This 21-year marriage has it all: Physical pain? Check. Miscommunication (or total lack of communication)? Check. Selfishness? Check. Resentment? Check. Bitterness? Check! […]

Your Call
Your Call: Does Love Mean the End of Sex with Other People?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call on the letter below by leaving your advice in the comments section.  When a guy really loves you, how often […]

Confessions
The Great Strap-On Debate: Can a Woman Pressure Her Boyfriend to Get Pegged?

Every few months, a new debate pops up in the comments section of one of our most popular, evergreen posts — “Confession: I Want to Do My Boyfriend with a Strap-On” — written by an anonymous female contributor a few years ago. The standard fare is usually something tired about how “it’s gay and feminizing […]

How To
12 Bedroom DON’Ts Men & Women Are STILL Committing

We’re not big fans of exiling men and women to their own separate planets — Mars and Venus, respectively — with nary a shuttle between them. There’s a lot more that we have in common than we don’t. That said, when you grow up in a culture committed to putting everyone into two neat gender boxes […]

Confessions
The Negative Power of Porn

Porn is a tricky thing. On the one hand, you can’t legislate people’s fantasies, especially when pornography may be the one sexual outlet they have.  As sexual liberator, educator or tension reliever, it can be a positive thing. But, it can also be a destructive thing: ruining relationships, setting up unrealistic expectations, perpetuating misogyny. Certainly some porn […]

Dream Interpretation
I Dreamt I Had a Burnt Penis, Then a Flaming Vulva!

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. If you’ve got a good one, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg just might tell you what it means! Click here to submit yours (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri: I had the strangest dream last night. I cannot remember all of the parts, but […]

How To
Guys Dish on What Makes a Woman Good in Bed (Their Answers Might Surprise You!)

by Rebecca Jane Stokes for YourTango We asked a group of men to tell us what makes a woman good in bed. Is someone’s sex skill level a thing you can clock? Aside from a big ol’ orgasm, what to surprises and delights you in bed with the right partner? These guys were maybe far too happy […]

Advice
7 Things You NEED to Know About Guys Who Beat Up Their Partners

by Bonnie Fuller for YourTango Men who batter rarely do it once, even if they are rich and famous. So if you’re in a relationship with a guy who has pushed, hit or slapped you once, take it as a warning sign. You can expect him to do it again and again. Here’s everything you need to […]

Confessions
A Straight Man’s Take on Rape Culture

As usual, Johnny had something thoughtful to say. This past week it was about rape culture, thanks to the Stanford rape case in the news: You know… as a straight man you think “rape culture” is bullshit when you learn about it. You believe that a tiny percentage of men are rapists, and since they’re sociopaths, there’s no […]

How To
One Straight Man’s Strong Case for the MFM Threeway

Doctor SexyThing for YourTango There are two kinds of threesomes, and don’t you dare get them confused. There’s “the good kind,” an FMF threesome, and there’s a “Devil’s Threesome” AKA a MFM threesome. MFM is the one guys are worried their girl really means when she says, “Sure, I’d be up for a threesome sometime.” (Please note: I’m not […]

How To
Straight Ladies, Here Are the 3 Biggest Things That Bug Men in Bed

byJordan Gray for YourTango Listen up, ladies. Sex is where we literally and metaphorically get naked together. It’s vulnerable. And, for some men, it can sometimes feel like walking on a minefield. Sex can be a stressful topic for everyone, but in my coaching practice where I work with a lot of men on sexual issues, the […]