Men vs. Women
News
The Incel Rebellion

Longtime EMandLO.com reader Dave on the Incel Rebellion: On April 23rd, 2018, a lone male drove a delivery style van down a crowded Toronto sidewalk, killing 10 people and seriously injuring dozens of others. First thoughts from the media and the general public were that this might have been a terrorist attack, based (sadly) upon […]

TV
Sex Is Life-Affirming Freedom in “The Handmaid’s Tale” 

[spoiler alert!] When the state controls your body, sex is rape. The “ceremony” scenes in Season 1 of “The Handmaid’s Tale” on Hulu (based on the 1985 seemingly evergreen novel of the same name by Margaret Atwood) made that clear: when a fertile handmaid’s male “master” penetrates her in the presence of his infertile wife, there […]

What's Up Doc?
Dear Dr. Kate, Should I Have a FEMALE Gynecologist?

You wish  Dr. Kate were your gynecologist.  She’s an OB/GYN at one of the largest teaching hospitals in Boston who lectures nationally on women’s health issues and conducts research on reproductive health.  She regularly (and generously!) answers your health questions here on EMandLO.com. Today she responds to the question of whether women should have a female obgyn.  To ask her your own […]

Confessions
5 Reasons Why 20-Something Women Should Be (and Stay) Single

Edie Freedman is a student at New York University studying social and cultural analysis, politics and psychology. There she is a writer and editor for The Tab NYU. As a 21-year-old, soon-to-be college graduate, there are a couple standard questions I invariably get from extended family members: How did your mid-terms/finals go? What are your plans after […]

Personal Essays
4 Dating Myths We’re STILL Stuck With

Edie Freedman is a student at New York University studying social and cultural analysis, politics and psychology. There she is a writer and editor for The Tab NYU. There is no question that the dating game for young people has changed dramatically in the last decade or so, thanks to social media and quick, instant-decision […]

Confessions
What Pickup Artistry Can Teach Us About Consent and Better Sex

I studied and practiced “The Game”-style pickup artistry back in the day. This may sound far-fetched, but it’s actually shaped my attitude on the subject of sexual communication and consent for the better. One of the biggest teaching points of many PUAs (pick-up artists) relates directly to the topic in the news of late: sensitivity […]

Wise Guys
Why Do Men Masturbate When They’re in a Relationship?

Advice from three of our guy friends. This time they answer the following: “Why do men masturbate in relationships, even when the sex is good and regular?” Straight Married Guy (Ben): Every guy has a regular masturbation frequency (RMF) that is more or less unchangeable (though over the long-term, factors which usually have nothing to […]

Dream Interpretation
I Dreamt I Happily Married a Mystery Groom

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex & relationships. If you’ve got a good one, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg just might tell you what it means! Click here to submit yours (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri about a mystery groom in her dream: I had a weird dream where […]

Pop Culture
Your New Favorite Book: “The Power” by Naomi Alderman

The Power by Naomi Alderman, which won the Baileys Women’s Prize for Fiction earlier this year in England, has already been hailed as “our era’s ‘Handmaid’s Tale,’” it’s that good.  The novel imagines women suddenly having the ability, thanks to environmental pollutants, to emit from their hands electrical charges of varying degrees — from prickly […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week: When Abuse of Power Is Your Fetish

Leave it to MVP Johnny to get inside the male mind and see that the abuse of power is the turn on for some: The common denominator I see in all these men – whether they’re rapists like Weinstein or just inappropriate jerks like C.K. – is that they like to venture outside the bounds […]

Pop Culture
When Your Son Wants to Wear Nail Polish…

Show him this! Em’s six year old is a cool, creative kid who occasionally likes to wear nail polish and hair dye. He also happens to be a boy. This — surprise, surprise! — means he’s been teased multiple times at school for it with the refrain “Only girls do that!” It’s a narrow world-view […]

Pop Culture
The Myth of Women’s Sacredness

We don’t want special treatment, just equality and justice. On October 19th, 2017, Chief of Staff John Kelly gave a fiercely personal defense of President Trump’s failed attempt at a sympathetic call to the grieving widow of one of the four soldiers recently killed in the Niger ambush. Having lost his own son to combat, […]

How To
Em & Lo’s Glossary of Female Sexual Anatomy

There’s a lot more than meets the eye when it comes to female sexual anatomy: the waters of that pleasure system run way deep. These parts are not inferior, miniature versions of the male sexual anatomy, but rather equitable, albeit more internal, sexual structures that enjoy stimulation just as much. They simply need the right […]

Wise Guys
Wise Guys: Why Do Men Get in Touch with Past Flames?

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “Why do guys get back in touch with old flames? Booty call? Rekindle the romance? To prove they’re over the woman? Just to say hi? Just got dumped and need an ego boost?” Straight Married Guy (James Glazebrook): At the risk of […]

Personal Essays
Here’s What Happened When I Confronted Men Who Catcall

Danielle Page decided to try to confront men who catcall. She asked them why they do it. Their answers will surprise you. I don’t remember the first time I was catcalled. Maybe it’s because I’m jaded from living and working in NYC, the catcalling capital of the world. Perhaps it’s due to the fact that catcalling becomes […]

Toys
Men’s Sex Toys Leave a Lot to Be Desired

A word of warning: Some links are definitely NSFW. Women’s sex toys can be things of beauty. Just look at Em & Lo’s BFF, LELO: They offer pleasure objects that make me wish I had lady bits just so I could try them…that make me want to play with people who do have lady bits […]